I have come a long way
 

I was sober for 8 months before I had a 2 day relapse back in July. Now I am over 3 months sober.

I did a lot of my drinking in my bedroom, behind closed doors. I drank to cope with anxiety and to cover up my shyness. Actually, growing up I always felt different to others. I was the shy kid who loved studying and reading books above all else and was perfectly happy left to my own devices. In fact, I preferred it that way.

Somewhere along the way I picked up this idea that I was not as good as everyone else. That everyone else was better than me. And I locked myself away in my bedsit and drank. And nearly destroyed myself.

My therapist had to do a lot of work with me in the early days. He held my hand as I started taking baby steps through life and picking up the pieces. There were days when I was so afraid of everything. One day he said to me "start small. Your task for next week is to get the local paper, select one job, print off a CV, and post it. I don't care what it is and it doesn't matter if you don't get it. Just do it". I can still remember the fear as I printed my CV, found and envelope and headed to the post office. I was shaking with nerves. That was over a year ago.

I had a job interview this morning with a large multinational company...the corporate world has always scared and fascinated me ever since my first trip to London at the age of 18...the train in the morning would be full of bankers in suits, with shiny shoes and slicked back hair with a briefcase and a copy of The Financial Times under their arm.

Anyway, the guy this morning said to me "we had 20 applications for this job, we whittled the CVs down to 5 and you were one of them, so congratulations" He was so casual sitting back in the chair, all that was missing was his feet up on the table. Ah, I envy his easy self assurance.

I looked at myself in the mirror this afternoon as I took off my good suit, and I thought "you have come a long way kid. You should be very proud". They said they would be in touch about the position. Even if I don't get it, there will be others, and I am in a good place now. I am sitting here with a medium cinnamon latte, feeling smiley, happy and healthy. I raise my cup to all of you. I would not be here without you guys. So thank you xx

Well done on 3 months tetra thats fantastic

Thank you :)

The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one - Elbert Hubbard.

What a fantastic post, T.

I am so proud of you sitting in that interview. You have come such a long way. I know you're going to get a job that suits you and your good suit! :)

That's an amazing story. I can relate to alot of it myself...:D

Well done on getting your life back in order. Drinking turned me into someone else..Someone i didn't like and didn't know.

I'm still in the early stages...But am slowly feeling like it's OK to be me again.

Tetra, that is so great! I love this post!!! :You_Rock_

Congratulations on the three months, Tetra--and congratulations for impressing that interviewer so much that you made it to the top 5 applicants! I hope you get the position!

Congrats on three months sober! :scoregood And good job on being one of the final five. :hug:

Awesome!

I can do all things through he who strengthens me

Congratulations on your sober time, and good luck with the job.

Thank you for such a fantastic post, Tetra! Your Story is very uplifting for us all! Congratulations on all your success to date. And good luck with the gig!

Thank You Tetra & Great Job on 3 months.....inspirational post:)

Nice job Tetra! Well done! You got this.:You_Rock_

Good going, Tetra!
Fabulous post!

And you deserve everything good that comes your way, Tetra. I'm so glad you're finally proud of yourself - you've worked so hard for that :hug:

Love this post Tetra! You feel a lot like I felt 12 months ago, I was in the same exact spot! Good for you! Good luck with getting the position, you are really proving to be a great applicant and whoever lands you will be lucky to have you. It must feel great to get this kind of feedback from a prospective employer!

Tetra I am going to congratulate you on your 3 months sober, AND your previous 8 months sober before that.

I notice that whenever you start a thread you bring the 2 day relapse front and center. That is not who you are!

I visualize a very talented, stronger woman (in a nice suit too). pounding the job market, knocking on doors until she gets a great new career. Whoever hires you will be lucky to have you. and you know how to bake!

I am going to borrow one of Hevyn's signatures...."you are so much more than the worst thing you have ever done"

Fantastic stuff Tetra, you have come a long way!! :You_Rock_

Great post! Congrats on your sober time! Best wishes. :)

The Promises will come true when we
work for them. And YOU HAVE and ARE
working for them. Gifts in recovery we
treasure and are forever grateful for. :)