SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

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-   -   Reality check please! (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/339801-reality-check-please.html)

21Hope 07-22-2014 08:53 PM

Reality check please!
 
I'm taking the risk and putting myself out here. I finally have had a true reality check being part of this group. I have always compared myself to what a real alcoholic looks like. A real alcoholic is the person that drinks the moment they wake up until they go to bed. They are losers without a job or a real family. They get the shakes if they don't drink. And they usually drink Vodka!! Reality check... Umm No!!! I am an alcoholic. I have a great family, I have a good job, ( I'm a teacher) shocking that a teacher could be an alcoholic!! I don't drink during the day, only after 5. And ONLY a bottle of white and a few beers. I have never been called out by others, my hubby only, but hide the evidence even he doesn't know the truth. I'm 43 and I do not go to bars or clubs, I do not make a scene. But I do drink too much wine, text, Facebook weird crap and wake up with a headache and that sinking feeling ... What did I post???Bottom line is... I feel like crap. It is very empowering to read about people just like me! I'm an addicted to booze. That's reality !!

21Hope 07-22-2014 09:00 PM


Originally Posted by 21Hope (Post 4796306)
I'm taking the risk and putting myself out here. I finally have had a true reality check being part of this group. I have always compared myself to what a real alcoholic looks like. A real alcoholic is the person that drinks the moment they wake up until they go to bed. They are losers without a job or a real family. They get the shakes if they don't drink. And they usually drink Vodka!! Reality check... Umm No!!! I am an alcoholic. I have a great family, I have a good job, ( I'm a teacher) shocking that a teacher could be an alcoholic!! I don't drink during the day, only after 5. And ONLY a bottle of white and a few beers. I have never been called out by others, my hubby only, but hide the evidence even he doesn't know the truth. I'm 43 and I do not go to bars or clubs, I do not make a scene. But I do drink too much wine, text, Facebook weird crap and wake up with a headache and that sinking feeling ... What did I post???Bottom line is... I feel like crap. It is very empowering to read about people just like me! I'm an addicted to booze. That's reality !!

My number one reason for becoming sober is for health, my family, and my vanity!!! Lol! I'm being honest,.... Alcoholics are ugly and old looking. I want to stay cute , blonde and young looking. I'm 43 and I KNOW my looks are going down hill sooner than later while I'm on this path!!!

21Hope 07-22-2014 09:03 PM

That sounds soo lame!! I know,but looks matter in our society! I feel prettier 8 days sober... ( probably not ) but I see a glow!

ForMyGirls 07-22-2014 09:13 PM

You and me have a lot in common! I have a great job (Partner with large CPA firm), wonderful wife (who's a teacher), three beautiful children, and never drank during the day (at least not during the work week)... No "clubbing", no trouble with the law, and no one ever calling me out aside from my wife... In fact, the last night of drinking I had was the night that my wife caught me sneaking out to my truck and taking a swig off of the vodka that I had hidden in a water bottle there (so I guess I did the vodka thing?)... That was kind of embarrassing...

Sillyboy 07-22-2014 09:19 PM

Oh lord, the texts and FB messages when I was drunk, completely embarrassed me. I did it to myself, and feel like a slug...slow, non thinking and unapproachable. I too believed I had it under control with just some wine. That wine turned into vodka straight. I wish you all the hope in the world, we all need it, and this forum will present it.

21Hope 07-22-2014 09:23 PM

@formygirls I get it! vodka, wine,beer, whiskey ... It's All booze and it kills our insides and makes us act weird!!! At least it does that to me...j can't stop at 2 ... :( btw- thanks for replying. I'm new and don't post just to post! It means a lot!

21Hope 07-22-2014 09:24 PM

You get it Siilyboy!! That is so great! :)

instant 07-22-2014 09:43 PM

Great you are here and have made a choice to be a healthier you. It has long been the case that alcohol does not favour any strata of society. The stuff is addictive and eats the souls of those who drink enough of it. i have a professional occupation and everything looked Ok superficially. Now i am sober over three years and life is so much better in ways i did not imagine.

21Hope 07-22-2014 09:55 PM

@instant, you are my role model! I'm stoked on hitting two weeks sober!

Heartfan82 07-22-2014 10:37 PM

Aw, it's great that you found this forum; you're right, there are so many others just like you here. Hope you keep reading and posting, there's so much helpful info and encouragement, and inspiring stories. It has been a lifeline to me, even through some pretty rough stuff happening in my family....

Congrats on two weeks! That IS something to be stoked about....and don't you enjoy the mornings with no hangover, and no wondering what the he!! you said or did last night?

Best wishes on your sober journey! It means a lot that you have admitted that you have a problem with drinking.

Peace,
Heartfan~

DisplacedGRITS 07-23-2014 02:36 AM

I'm coming up on 4 months sober and i get compliments on my skin. I'm 33 and i think this is the age most women start noticing frown lines and the like. Not me! I can't believe how different i feel. I'm sure part of it is not having poison flowing through my veins but another part of it is my skincare regimen. No more falling asleep with makeup on! I wash up and put my lotion on and go to sleep squeaky clean. Feels good!

What i didn't expect was the changes that happened inside. I've had a complete upheaval in my way of thinking and living. Where my heart once held anger, fear and frustration, there now dwells tolerance, understanding, acceptance and forgiveness. It's amazing. I am finally at peace! Welcome to the sober life. It looks good on you. ;)

GracieLou 07-23-2014 02:42 AM


Originally Posted by 21Hope (Post 4796354)
can't stop at 2 ...

This says what you are looking for!

I could not stop either. It was the first drink that got me drunk, every single time!

SoberLeigh 07-23-2014 03:20 AM

Welcome, 21Hope.

So many reasons to get sober; when you are healthy, it shows from the inside-out.

Nowsthetime 07-23-2014 04:30 AM

I relate. Alcoholic is a term to encompass lots of behaviors. I also have an amazing job, great husband, beautiful daughter. I am successful and nobody in my life believes I'm an alcoholic.. I never drank alone or in the am, I could go weeks without drinking but when I did it was a problem.

It took me years to decide but I once I did a little over 4 months ago, it stuck. I haven't been to AA but I read here everyday.

It has really helped. Let's do this together!

Hereandnow2 07-23-2014 04:49 AM

Love your post 21! I too am slightly vain!i am much less bloated and feel and look better because I'm not hung over all the time! I'd like to lose five pounds but at 5"5 and 130 I feel ok right now and I even feel kinder to myself! I used to say lots of neg things to myself about my weight and am now trying to love myself again! Similar story to yours too! School social worker, 35, blonde, 2 boys, great husband ect but alcohol was not improving me or my life in any way!! Pm message me anytime for support!!

21Hope 07-23-2014 07:56 AM

Thanks for the comments and support! I love this site! :)

RolyPoly 07-23-2014 08:08 AM

I'm a single mom, 53, professional achiever. Almost 2 bottles of chardonnay every night. Something had to give. 2 weeks sober now and feeling so much better. We rock!:a122:

PurpleKnight 07-23-2014 10:15 AM

Yeap the definition just needs to extend to is alcohol causing problems in your life? if so then changes are needed!! :)

Mabel4 07-23-2014 10:26 AM

21Hope, so glad you are here with us! Congrats on 8 days sober! That is great!

I too am a professional and have never been in trouble with the law. Only drank after 5 p.m., only drank beer (never the hard stuff ... well, rarely) and have a good life. I honestly don't know if the people I worked with ever suspected I was a drunk. Boy, those mornings going into the office s*cked being all hung over. It is a wonder I even got my job done, but somehow I guess I managed.

I used to think that all day drunks were the only kind of drunk, but that just isn't true. There are lots of us that are alcoholics in other forms and if you keep drinking, the all day drunk, may soon be you (or me, or any of us).

The sooner you nip the problem in the bud, the better it is. I am on Day Two of being sober and I feel better already.

Keep posting! :)

Oh and by the way, I am 44, so we are about the same age. Also, for the vanity thing, check out this thread: http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ere-using.html

alaina742 07-23-2014 11:32 AM

I got sober before texts were a thing...but I did have a cell phone and I cringe at some of the late night calls! The worst was once I called a guy I was casually seeing just to say hiiiiii (I was super excited for some reason) and he literally b----ED me out the next day, because he had to be up early for something important. I was humiliated!!!

Anyway. I never drank every day. But I'm still an alcoholic, because when I did Drink, there was no stopping me. There are all kinds of alcoholics in this world. And yet, there is only one true type: the type who cannot stop at one drink.


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