Wastinglife

I was recently looking at photos that were in an old file on my *****. They go back to before I was alcoholic. I noticed that as they became more recent from around 2007 onward, I went from a normal weight, fresh faced young man to a bloated, sweaty, almost obese shell of a man.

I can't believe I let myself get like that. At the time, I was drinking alcoholically, and I had no idea I was that fat. How did I not see that?

I brought this up with my therapist today and she mentioned that addicts often go through disassociation. They detach themselves from their immediate surroundings and physical/emotional experience. I gained 50 pounds but didn't seem to realize it even as I looked in the mirror and saw a beer belly and as my clothes didn't fit.

Anyone else get like this during their worst drinking period?

Waterfalls2014

I've went through that too. I noticed I've gained weight recently. But it's like 30 lbs. I can't believe I didn't notice either. Interesting about the detachment.

Mabel4

I have a driver's license photo that unfortunately I will have for several years of me at my worst (everyday) drinking period. My face look fat and bloated and I was 15 pounds overweight. At the time, I tried to convince myself that going up almost two jean sizes wasn't a big deal.

I look at that photo now and hate how I looked. I also hate showing my ID with that picture on it, but don't have a choice. Thankfully, I don't drink everyday anymore and lost the weight. I am still struggling with staying completely stopped, but one day at a time, I hope to get there.

PurpleKnight

Yeah changes just crept up on me, but when I was drinking everyday, anything could have been happening in the world, never mind with regards myself and I wouldn't have noticed it!! . . . Sobriety has thankfully improved my outward appearance again!!

junk33

I get a red fat face , splotchy , gross blueish /red bags under my eyes,about 20 lbs overweight..i wont be on the" Bachelor" any time in the near future

Serenidad

Yes! I relate!

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DoubleBarrel

I have some HORRENDOUS photos, some that should be nice pics of me with my children, but I am red faced and shiny. Quite scary.

I have lost about thirty pounds, and still am not to where I once was. I had no idea I had slipped so far.

Pipping

When I was drinking heavily I actually thought I looked really nice. I knew I had gained weight but solved this by tilting my full length mirror on a flattering angle so that I appeared much slimmer. I gained at least 30 pounds in two years and deluded myself that I was still slim. While cleaning out some drawers I came across some old photos taken during my heavy drinking period and I was shocked. Pudgy red shiny face and I look so old, hair bleached within an inch of its life. I had fat rolls on my neck if you can picture that. I looked a bit like a man. I actually thought I was hot. Holy hell.

ESD907

since I was a closet drinker, my 1st real hit came when my mom said, you may need to go on a diet, you look blousy. THAT about killed me. Blousy. Took me 2 more years and her death to finally quit.

Notmyrealname

I got up to 270 lbs, just drank and ate myself to jowls and a double chin. Now I am 196 lbs, still a work in progress but it's a lot better life.

When I was at 270, I couldn't kneel down for anything without my knees just killing me from supporting my weight, that always struck me as strange. Now I need to go to one knee for whatever reason (glove save in goal? dunno) it's clear sailing. Can manage 7.5 minute miles, still working on that but I'm in shouting distance of a 6:xx mile, pretty crazy.

HockeyGuy

For myself, when I drink I neglect everything, including eating, working out, etc., so I end up losing weight. I get a tired, strung out look on my face.

SoberryHappy

I can look at old pictures of myself and immediately tell whether or not I had been drinking in them.. my eyes are a total giveaway. My eyes get really lazy when I'm drinking and kind of drift around... it's really creepy looking at myself in those pictures now. I also hate that I can look through an entire album and think to mysef "I was drunk in that pic, I was drinking in that pic, I was wasted in that pic, had a few in that one, there I am with a glass of wine......" During our last family photo session I had a few glasses of wine to just relax, and I can see it in my eyes when I look at them... and they are hanging up everywhere. It's shameful. I still cringe when I think about how much time I've wasted drinking. But thankfully in all of my pictures now I'm bright eyed and my skin is glowing and I'm genuinely happy

jezza

Don't like looking at pics of me at the best of times!!!!

ccam1973

I can totally relate. Heavy drinking in my 20's and early 30's didn't really have an effect on my weight. Late 30's and year 40 i had gained 40 pounds. I knew my clothes didn't fit anymore, i was uncomfortable in my body, etc, but was somehow ok with it as long as i was able to drink, drink, drink! Guess i didn't realize how big i was until my kids started calling me "chubby daddy"; in joking of course they were only 4 and 7 at the time.

I was so red faced that people always thought i was sun burnt and I was a sweaty mess 24/7.

I look at my past pictures and can't believe i let it go on for so long.

So glad not to be drinking anymore!

Croissant

I had a great metabolism and screwed it through drinking.

LBrain

Fortunately for me I didn't have a digital camera that showed me 'drinking'. All of my drinking pics are 'filed' into boxes. But there is a noticeable difference between my drivers license photo and me now.

UnixBer

No thanks. But the message is clear. The difference is quite vast.
It is still traumatic to look at those pictures. The question is: how did that happen?

cusper

Last year at this time I knew I looked bad. I saw and old boyfriend from highschool on the train and I hid behind a book because he looked fantastic and I looked terrible. I had gained 30lbs, my face looked so haggared and blotchy. Whenever i ran into people i knew they would tell me that I looked tired. Plus my hair was falling out and had no shine. I refused to let people take pictures.