Hating myself
 

I slipped and drank after 10 days. I hate myself right now.

Hate helps no one iwant. If you want to be better, you need to start over and move on. There will be bumps in the road to sobriety...and how you respond makes all the difference in the world.

Take a breath. Beating yourself up won't help you move forward IWant - if a friend had slipped you'd be understanding and supportive - you'd ask 'why' and you'd help them through it. You wouldn't hate them. So, be a friend to yourself. You did 10 days - you can start again.

The best thing you can do is to figure out what made you drink and use that as a learning tool. It doesn't have to happen again.

I'm glad you're back.

Ten days is a good string of green on the calendear . :You_Rock_

What bought you to the point of slipping if you don't mind me asking ? Could you do something differently this time round , get more support ?

I used to come round again and again tripping over the same ruts in the road .. I hope you come to hate the alcohol and what it does to you and not yourself , there is a difference y'know .

Bestwishes, M

woah, woah, woah. do not hate yourself. i've done that too & i'm seeing the results and it's not good.

this is serious issue we deal with, but it seems hating ourselves doesn't fix it.

it's a matter of health for me to fix this. i don't know what will work for you, but hating yourself is not healthy.

hang in there. we've all made these mistakes here.

there's plenty of good people here who have made mistakes.

you can make good mistakes too,

sorry best i can do right now

IWTBB,
That self hate is what got me in that circle of hell and kept me in it for so long. Turn that feeling around and hand it back to the cr*p that made you feel that way. Its not you. You are not a bad person and you deserve a good life.

10 days was not wasted. I did the very same thing after 14 days awhile back. It showed me nothing had changed in that world. It was that experience that gave me the strength to finally do it. That is when I left it and never looked back.

You can do this.

Close your eyes for a few moments. Take a few deep breaths. In through the nose, out through the mouth. Focus on the breathing. The air coming in is cool, fresh and blue. The air going out is hot, stale and red. Get rid of it. It's full of the self-hate that your AV loves. The self-hate your AV will use against you in the future if you keep it in. Blow it out. Be done with that emotion.

It's all of us against the addiction. Get back in the fight. We need you.

Thank you for that guided meditation Nons. I was into it!

Anna has said, and I am not quoting, that sobriety has starts and stops. This really is something that resonated with me. 10 days is still 10 days. Lets move forward without the hate, and lets take the necessary steps to ensure that drinking is not an option. What do you think was the breaking point for you?

I use to hate myself everytime I would relapse and that would just put me back on the pity pot and the cycle would start again.

Hate the addiction not yourself. The addictive side of your brains wants you to hate yourself. Don't give in.

You are not the only who has done it and you won't be the last. The important thing is to concentrate on what kept you going those 10 days. We all make mistakes along the way, the important thing is that we learn from them.

You can do this!

IWant,
Most likely you didn't slip into a drink. You drank a drink. For me, taking responsibility for getting better was my first real step to recovery. If I think about drinking then my next job is to think about why I would want to self destruct.
Why did you decide to drink?

Don't hate yourself. Let it go,you're back here.You had ten days,you can get there again and beyond. Look at what made you slip and avoid next time round. You CAN do this

Well done for coming here and telling us Iwanttobebetter - that's a really good step back to recovery!

Hating yourself is wasted energy, Iwant :)
many of us falter - this recovery stuff is hard....

so you sank - It happens.

this is a good chance to look at your recovery boat and plug those leaks and make her seaworthy again...this time for good :)

what can you do differently this time?
D

You're back and that's all that matters. You can get on track again and do it this time. I'm glad you wanted to talk about what happened. Like the others said, hating yourself serves no purpose and will just hold you down. Please rise above that feeling and continue on your path - we know you can do it.

don't hate YOU...hate the addiction...and then love yourself enough to kick it to the curb. don't let the lure of a substance DEFINE you...you are more than that, better than that. stand tall today...I believe you can!

The important thing is never give up giving up.
It'll stick soon enough, right now you need to start counting again and feel the pride in going ten days.
Fantastic now beat it!
John.

I need this thread in my life right now. Thank you Iwanttobebetter.

I'm of the mind that hating ourselves got us to the bottom of the bottle in the first place. You're here..and that's awesome. This is my 3rd go here at SR...and I did NOT have the courage to come back here after the disaster the first 2 times. Shame kept me away...and kept me drinking. I slipped back into denial and hiding from myself and others.
I'm impressed you came right back. Stronger than I was....I think that's progressive..not failure.

Sobriety is a gift we receive. We only have the present...so just keep loading up on the presents : )