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-   -   What are your thoughts on drinking at weekends only (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/293190-what-your-thoughts-drinking-weekends-only.html)

Gottalife 04-30-2013 03:09 PM

If you were a real alcoholic and reading the AA Big Book, it would suggest that, as you have to avoid drinking situations, you still have an alcoholic mind. It would suggest also that as you are entertaining the idea that someday you may be able to drink like other people, you haven't yet entirely taken the first step - the delusion that you are like other people or presently maybe, has not been smashed. It would also suggest that maybe it would be worth a good case of the jitters to get a full knowledge of your condition.

On the other hand, if you were a hard drinker who just ran into some problems, you may find that you can moderate. In my book 4 or 5 cans over a weekend (assuming these cans are not the size of kegs) is very moderate indeed, but as an alcoholic, completely beyond my ability.

sugarbear1 04-30-2013 04:30 PM

It's not how much or how often we drink....

I'm an all or nothing person. Funny thing is, drinking was only a symptom.

Give yourself more time without drinking, in the big picture, 10 months isn't really very long and really not that sober.

I wish you an exciting sober summer!

Hevyn 04-30-2013 05:07 PM

Hi cardealer. Oh, how I wanted to be able to just have a few once in awhile. I can't remember one time that my plan to moderate ever worked, though. I caused myself so much grief and pain only to find out it could never be. I know you'd like a more positive answer, but I also know you want our honestly.

terribob 04-30-2013 06:50 PM

I tried just for 1 night. That led to weeks of drinking again. I can't do it. I know a lot of others who can't do it. If you had a problem before it's likely you'll have a problem again.

Tippingpoint 04-30-2013 07:10 PM

You could try it and maybe you could manage it but you should also consider the real possibility that it will be far worse than not drinking...having to shut it down every time you're just starting to feel good. Having to do it again the next day. Having to wait 5 more days before you can tease your addiction one more time. Then your wife will be away and you'll let loose...just the once...what's the harm? And then stopping after 5 is cruel and unusual and on and on and on.

For me, I don't see the point in moderating.

Mizzuno 04-30-2013 09:04 PM

It's probably not a good idea .The weekends would only lead me into the week. From there I would find myself horribly sick and drunk all the time. I may get arrested or something worse. I have too much to lose.I think ill stick with what I'm doing. I have hangover free mornings and evenings that I remember.

Happier 04-30-2013 09:42 PM

I thought I could go back to drinking normal but I was very wrong......twice. Slow learner I guess. It eventually started to bother me that I thought things would be dull if I were to never drink again. Alcohol obviously had a strong and controlling power over my life if I needed it to make life interesting. In my case, I instead decided that i wanted to relearn to appreciate and enjoy life as it truly is...in its natural state without some chemically induced falsehood. I knew I had been able to do that before I started drinking so it must be somehow possible.

I am happy to report significant progress in this effort. I continue to learn and am grateful to be growing and actually enjoying the journey towards a healthier place.

Wishing you well on whatever you decide.

YouRmySunshine 04-30-2013 10:51 PM

:c001:
Not an option for an alcoholic, Period.

nogard 04-30-2013 11:02 PM

I know I cant, cant have one that is, never have been able to.

How long you been sober? Why not give it another 90 days and see how you go. All the booze will still be there waiting for you. You got nothing to lose and maybe a lot to gain.

Coming up to 8 years for me and my life is full of love work creativity joy and sure problems but I am always ok never thought I could say that without something in my blood to make me feel ok or lay me out.

90 days and then see eh?

LadyinBC 04-30-2013 11:56 PM

You are at 10 months and it is not uncommon for people at this point to have thoughts that they can drink "only" on the weekends or drink "normally". After awhile we sometimes become complacent and forget what we struggled with at the beginning or why we quit.

The fact that you are even asking this question should be a red flag for you. It will only be a dull and unrewarding summer without the booze if you make it one.

Bubovski 05-01-2013 12:17 AM

Fine line between pleasure and pain.
Health issues, how you were in the past, out bursts if any.........
If you can stop appropriately, within your values, without feeling cheated, then perhaps yes!---it is entirely up to you and how you perceive your history....

rattus99 05-01-2013 12:22 AM


Originally Posted by cardealer (Post 3943977)
sitting around a fire with close friends at a bikers rally,

I seem to remember that Sonny Barger was known for not drinking - indeed he ended up in fights for not drinking!

graig 05-01-2013 01:45 AM

I have to say feel in the same boat ive only stopped drinking this week and only drink on weekends 99% of the time unless some occasion during the week.most weekends couple of drinks at night or with friends in the pub .but have being having break out s of ridiculous heavy drinking at maybe family occasion s and other things gradually getting worse over the last couple of years and not knowing when to stop.would never get a hang over which probably doesn't help the situation. Came to a conclusion last weekend probably through choice and maybe a talking to by family members that I needed to take a look at my drinking after heavy drinking...I to would like to think I could get a grip on it and go back to social drinking in 3/6/9 months maybe I might never be able to go back or hopfully not want to go back I dont know.like our neighbours in the uk so much revolves around drink in ireland..best of luck what ever you decide and I hope it works out for you.

HellJuice 05-01-2013 02:38 AM

IMO, if you can abstain from drinking to only on the weekends, you are NOT a true alcoholic. Again JMO.
I have tried being a "light drinker" or a weekend drinker.. has never worked.
It's kind of like lays potato chips, once you pop you can't stop!

With that said, a former alcoholic that has overcome the disease MAY be able to someday be a weekend drinker, but to me, if I were ever that person, I wouldn't do it.. just not worth it.. this crap is poison. There is NOTHING good to come out of drinking nothing...

FeelingGreat 05-01-2013 02:48 AM

If you think you'll have trouble stopping once you start again, don't do it. If that's not an issue, you could try it and find out.
I think it would be disastrous for most alcoholics, but everyone's different.

Threshold 05-01-2013 06:11 AM

If we could successfully moderate, we wouldn't have had to quit.

I call this playing chicken.

I used to run across traffic every day. Then I got hit by a bus. It took me 10 months to get over it, now I wonder if it's ok for me to run across traffic...only on the weekends, and I'll only do it a few times.

Well, sure, go ahead. But the chances of getting hit by a bus or truck are still there. If you didn't figure it out that in the ten months sober, you NEVER got hit by a bus....and that your chances of getting hit by a bus only exist if you "play chicken" again...then maybe you need to run out in traffic a few more times and see how it feels.

I tried it. More than once. There are a LOT of buses out there.

HML 05-01-2013 06:29 AM

I quit for 18 months once and then decided I could drink only on the weekends. A few years later I'm up to drinking on every day I'm not hungover. I'm on Day 10, and committed to lifetime sobriety. Thank you very much for reminding me that my AV will be waiting for the day when I again think, "Why can't I just have a couple of glasses of wine on the weekend to unwind?" I'm prepared this time -- the answer is: I can't, period. No. I'm not going there.

Best of luck!

DarkDays 05-01-2013 06:33 AM


Originally Posted by HML (Post 3945052)
I quit for 18 months once and then decided I could drink only on the weekends. A few years later I'm up to drinking on every day I'm not hungover. I'm on Day 10, and committed to lifetime sobriety. Thank you very much for reminding me that my AV will be waiting for the day when I again think, "Why can't I just have a couple of glasses of wine on the weekend to unwind?" I'm prepared this time -- the answer is: I can't, period. No. I'm not going there.

Best of luck!

Thats the spirit ! Grind it out , alcohell is just complete utter BS.

LDT 05-01-2013 06:37 AM

Thoughts on weekend drinking......big fat NO here! :c001:

The Kindling Effect is real, real real!

Living 05-01-2013 06:45 AM

Many good posts on this thread. I also read your past posts and feel you are putting yourself in grave danger. Can't offer much on long-term sobriety, because I am only a little over 3 weeks, but I can tell you the health benefits of not drinking.

Please don't do it.


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