WOW!!!! If this isn't the miracle of the program! Keep up the great work on self! :c011:

I thought the same thing....It's pretty amazing. I love to see that.

Sounds like someone is having a spiritual awakening. I love when that happens. :D

Work on yourself as u say u are and u will become the woman he would want to be with. And then u may even have 100 to choose from! Your young, u have plenty of time. Get well and u may even forget about him, our thoughts can't be trusted in early recovery. I'm there at the moment too and from one day to the next my thoughts and feelings change about the things going on in my life. All the best hun, stay sober, 2 months is great!!! :)

Oops, sorry, just read the whole thread and see u are in rehab and thinking much clearer. There will be someone awesome for u someday the way u are heading. All the best! :)

Did you work 5, 6 & 7? That is where change takes place. We can't see too much ourselves in step 4. It's just put on paper.

Keep staying stopped and focus on you!

Congratulations on the personal breakthrough, erutxet! So happy to hear your rehab and AA is working so well for you. Remember, the door to join our Class of May 2012 is always open for you, too, if you'd like support in a class of regulars. Excellent job. Keep it up. :)

You know that there are many things here that you are not seeing: For one you went out seeking SOBRIETY not a man. And obviously there is something more important to this man than you and that's HIS sobriety. You need to snap and see that your addiction is trying to distract you and think that you are in love with this man. What you are probably in love with is HIS SOBRIETY. What is it - Do you think that he his going to help you get sober? Cause the answer to that question is NO ONE can get you sober BUT YOURSELF. You are not only jeapordizing your sobriety by inviting feelings of rejection but YOU are also jeapordizing HIS sobrietyand your ex sponsors sobriety. The stress of not knowing how to make you see that he is just not interested in you at this time can be a trigger for him. C'mon now think of all the hard work it takes to stay sober. Almost anything can trigger someone. Back off of him and you need to find your sobriety instead of gazing and coveting other peoples sobriety. No one can't do it for you. And the poor sponsor that you had no respect for by even making advances to her ex mate is totally heartless....she tried to help you and you might have just thrown her off the boat. Be considerate of others and their struggle to stay sober. Really you need to read the twelve steps. Good luck.

I hope everyone will make the effort to read the whole thread.

I'm glad you're back erutxet - and very glad it sounds like you're in a better place now :)

D

I have not been able to do step 5 because the person I want to confide in isn't here at rehab with me. I'm glad I have this delay between steps 4 and 5 because my inventory is quite thorough, it has been a very overwhelming process. I can hardly believe I was able to admit all of my liabilities to myself in this way. No amount of psychiatry or medical assessment could point out my defects as well as I have in the last two weeks. I have been brutally honest with myself. It's incredible. I owe it all to the 12 and 12 book. :) I'm very excited to get back home and reconnect with meetings in my area and find a new sponsor. Thanks for the support.

What a great story you will have to help others! Incredible, erutxet. All my best--you are an inspiration to me.

You sound like a different person...I can't get over it. That 5th step is beautiful....As they say in the book...I was delighted...to do it. You're not going to fifth step with your new sponsor?

Welcome back, Texture-spelled-backwards :-). You sure sound like you're beginning a new and beautiful story. Good on ya! Big hug for you and your tremendous progress.

Working on ourselves isn't always easy (or fun), but I believe that challenges like this can help us get to know ourselves and change for the better... I think it's awesome that you seem to be willing to step back and look at this in a new way - getting honest with ourselves can only result in a healthier us!:c011:

Eru

Great to see you doing well in your recovery.

Really good to see that you are doing so well in yur rehab therapy. I send my hugs to you and a big cheer because I too was once in rehab , 4 years ago and it was there that I was brutally honest with myself and what I had done to myself. Its something to feel all the emotions but it feels so good to get it all out and you just feel so renewed. Also with the learning that the 12 steps bring is just added greatfulness. You're a strong person...that's a good thing. Keep up the good work and learn all you can about yourself and recovery. It's all up to you. You're there getting the help you need and I am very happy for you. Taking all the right steps. Hugs and prayers to you.

Eru,

Sounds like you're unwrapping a beautiful gift.

Your honesty and hard work on YOU, is to be commended.

Thanks for the very inspiring update.

I think it was wrong to say that you were not crazy, when someone suggested you needed help from a professional therapist. No one said you were crazy--they said you needed help.

Please look back at what you wrote in this thread. You sent a thousand messages to someone and harassed him to the point that he called the police, yet you still believe you stand a chance with him. If it were someone else who recounted this, what would you say to that person?

Notice, how you solicit feedback and then dismiss the feedback that differs from what you wanted to hear. You even at some points tell people what feedback they should have given instead. At no point that I saw, do you ever entertain a notion that you did not already have when you began. Again, I suggest looking at this as if it were someone else that had written here instead of yourself. What you you say to that person?

I bet you agree with everything you wrote in your original post. What do you think that means?

I really hope you work your 5th step with someone who works the steps of AA and understands the process. This is where you will see how you can change....

You are lucky to have access to the internet in rehab, mine wouldn't even allow cell phones and very little contact with the outside world as our focus was on the rehab process.

See you in chat when you return!
Hugs,

and wait until you make any amends.....speak with your sponsor!!!!!!!!