Well, I still don't have everything figured out yet, but I stayed sober last night. That's gotta be the first step, right? Woke up feeling good (although very early!) Still haven't figured everything else out yet, but I've decided to trust that you all know what you're talking about...that I have to take that leap of faith (thanks Dee!!) and trust that by getting and staying sober I will be able to see more clearly. So while I don't know all the details of my plan yet, I do know that. I will trust that being sober and having a clear head is the right thing to do, even if I don't feel worthy yet. I'll try not to feel so scared of happiness and feeling good.
Thanks for the support, everyone. You're so great! :)