I need to quit now!
 

I'm a 31-year-old male who has come to the realization that he has a problem: a disease called alcoholism. At first, alcohol was fun and games. I have been shy all my life and with alcohol, I found myself to be a fun and confident person. Starting in 2009, however, alcohol started becoming an issue. I cannot recall the number of times I got complete wasted and acted like an idiot.

Fast forward to last Friday. I went out to a rooftop bar after work and had a few drinks. I remember taking a shot with some random girls and that is the last thing I remember. I woke up the next morning in my house (not sure how I got there) covered in vomit. Yes, perhaps the lowest point in my life.

This was a wakeup call for me (I HOPE!) and I’ve made the decision to completely quit alcohol. I’ve tried the “drink in moderation” or “only drink beer,” etc. routines, but none have worked. After I’ve had two drinks, I become a different person – a person I abhor when I’m sober.

I’m opening myself on this forum because you people seem like nice folks. I hope that I can remain strong and beat this addiction.

Thanks for reading!

Welcome lawyer101 :)
You'll find a lot of support and ideas here :)

D

Welcome to SR! :a122:

No need to hope it's your wake-up call... declare that it is and own that :) Congrats on your big decision to make the commitment to quit! That's huge.

Welcome Lawyer101. I am also very shy and that is why I began drinking. I have found that shyness is very common in alcoholics, and many of us mention shyness as the reason of drinking.

I think we have to learn communication abilities, so we dont have to drink alcohol to socialize. A therapist may be very useful for this. AA also works quite well for this.

Alcoholism is a progressive disease: if you continue drinking, it ALWAYS gets worse, never better. The good news are that it can be stopped by not drinking. Sobriety is actually wonderful.

Sorry, english is not my first language. BTW, I am also a lawyer.

:welcome to SR.

Thank goodness you are getting sober...some people do not make it. One day at a time we recover together...SR has been a great resource for me as well as AA. Glad you are here.

Hi and Welcome!

Yes, I also became a completely different person and someone that I hated. And, blackouts are so very scary.

I'm glad that you recognize that you need to stop drinking and are motivated. Do you have a plan? I hope that you continue to read and post here at SR.

We are nice folks, just like you, and you can beat your addiction, just like us. Well Come.

Thanks for the encouraging words, all! I really like the point that I should not "hope" that I will get sober, but make and own the decision of getting sober! Thanks again!

BTW, Mariano, your english is just fine! I've noticed that our profession in general has problems with alcohol. Even in my case, I did not even touch alcohol until I became an attorney :-(

[QUOTE=Anna;3054420]
Do you have a plan? QUOTE]

No plans yet. Just hoping to take it one day at a time and remain positive. I drink after work on weekdays (I walk to work and on my way home, there are 10-20 bars conveniently located to meet to needs of an alcoholic like me). So, I know that this week is going to be quite challenging. I'm hoping though that if I can tough it out for two weeks, it'll get a bit easier. :a108:

Lawyer - Welcome!

Welcome to SR :)

Is there another route you could take home instead?

Try a different route home even if it longer.

1 day at a time is how it works

Unfortunately, no. I live in a big city and there are bars/clubs all over the damn place!

Yeah, i am one of you, too! At one of my meetings, we joke that you can't swing a 9 iron in the room without hitting an attorney. Yes, we have substance abuse issues. Glad you are are seeking help now at 31 rather than waiting 10 more years as i did.

Hiya Lawyer, thanks for joining us in the chat. I was serious about seeing a Doctor, and be totally honest. Of course you'll feel ashamed and embarrassed, but your life depends on it. From what you told us so far, you have a lot going for you and none of that will change if you can recognize the disease and then treat it. That's how you need to think of it, as a disease and not something to be ashamed of. So, no DUI's a practicing attorney, sounds pretty good to me!

If you passed the BAR once, you can do it again!

Good luck

How about taking a bus, cab, or train? Or riding your bike if you have one? Making it inconvenient to 'just stop in for one' may be a deterrent for you until you're stronger?

What about seeing a therapist or psychiatrist? It is highly recommended also to visit a doctor, since detox may be dangerous.

Quitting alcohol may be hard, so it is recommended to get all the help available.

Nice to meet other attorneys on this forum!

I need to do something, but bus, cab, train won't work as I live only two blocks from my work. Perhaps I should just move out of the city -- it sounded like a great idea to live in the middle of everything before I discovered my disease. But now it ain't so much fun. I know that I can control myself very well when I have to drive (don't wanna get a DUI). So, if I know that I have to drive home, that could help me break my habit.

You took the first step admitting you are an alcoholic. That is a great start. Welcome to SR. Lots of support here.

Hi Lawyer, and welcome to SR...

Just a little lawyer story to tell you. I have been involved in litigation for the past six a half years.

The defendants had me so frustrated at one point, that I turned to my lawyer and said, "These people are so lucky that the only pints I crack open these days is a pint of ice cream and not a pint of Jack Daniels". My lawyer cracked up, and shared that he was a friend of Bill W's.

I have to tell you, I will never have a different lawyer if ever I need one again!

He is smart, caring and was really instrumental in getting me through a trying time.

Incidentally, I won the case.

Glad to see you here on SR - sobriety rocks.

Hi lawyer! Be glad you are coming to this realization at 31, not 51. I drank almost my whole life and nearly destroyed myself insisting I could moderate. It never worked, even once. One drink and there was no telling where I would end up - a very dangerous situation. The last time I binged, it was the holidays & I had intended to have 2 egg nogs. Three weeks later I was walking to the liquor store in a blizzard, falling & crying - desperate to get my fix. Lovely! There was only one thing to do in the end, and that was to stop playing with it.

Shyness & self-consciousness only seems to be helped by drinking. I found that it actually held me back from growing and learning to interact normally with others. I hope you'll begin to feel free and happy without your "buffer" - and find that you no longer need it to enjoy life. It sounds like it's not fun or relaxing anymore for you. Let us know how it's going!

Welcome! You're at a good place now.

Maybe consider taking up running? If you change into your running clothes at work and run from there, you are less likely to want to drink after getting a good sweat on. I know joining a gym that's on my way home helped me immensely.

You certainly can beat it, but "hoping" never quite worked for me. You need to decide, without any reservation, what it is that you want to do - and I suggest quitting for good - and then do whatever you need to do to accomplish that.

BTW, you are correct about the legal field - I have seen many attorneys destroy themselves. You don't want to go there.

Welcome Lawyer101. You've landed in a good place-excellent advice and support here. It's really hard to be a professional by day, and a drinker by night. Feels like you do everything "right" all day and everything "wrong" at night. Then the next morning you get to figure out the night before while prepping for important things you can't miss at work. Fun times indeed lol Best of luck in your efforts! You'll have to find activities to replace the after work routine quickly. Gym was a good suggestion, Netflix has helped me...

Took me 25+ years, then I surrendered.

Lots of speakers online. Lots of programs. I use aa. Welcome home you aren't alone!

Welcome Lawyer! So happy you decided to join us and share your story. You will find tons of support and encouragement here.

:welcome

Best Wishes To You!

Welcome to the forum and congratulations for making a great decision. Just reaching out for help is a huge step and a smart one - most of us find that we can't do this on our own.

Take it one day at a time. You can do it. And it does get better!:grouphug:

Another attorney checking in. I can relate, and send you a private message. Wishing you all the best.

Welcome lawyer.