What a great thread. I'm jumping on the minimalist bandwagon (lol) with one word that initially worked for me:

Enough

And the other that helps me to live in recovery every day:

Acceptance

OK, jumping off the minimalist bandwagon for a sec...

My relapses were because I hadn't had enough of drinking - despite the God-awful experiences I was having time and time again, I just didn't want to stop. The day came when I knew I had had enough - I just knew it - there was a such a disgust for alcohol at that point in my life that I had absolutely no use for it anymore.

I didn't go tiptoe'ing through the tulips into la-la land, however. When I began feeling physically and emotionally better, I really accepted that I was an alcoholic. It's not the only label I use to define myself but that acceptance and being ok with being an alcoholic helps me to stay focused on what I need to do every single day to continue living in recovery.

I have some sucky moments and days like everybody. For me, I honestly have to say that having had enough of what alcohol does to me keeps me on the sober trail.

Wishing you well in finding your own path ~

gotta get my 5 post in as I'm new so this seemed like a good place to start. Hi everyone my Name is Tom and I'm an Alcoholic . New to this site i mean, 25 years in the program
of Alcoholics Anonymous. "One day if not minutes at a time. All I could do sometime is just scream and holler to stay out of my head and hang on so the Nerves wouldn't explode. Repeated the darn old serenity Prayer over and over. Got a flash of those signs
hanging on the meeting room walls. Easy does it, This to will pass, Think,think,think.
You all know those signs. Then it was time for a meeting. Gosh another day with out a drink. Walked in and saw every body smiling and telling jokes and hugging. I knew this was way out of what i needed. {Little did i know what in the hell i needed other than a drink of Scotch} I stayed didn't say anything but I pass. Did that for awhile.
Didn't know what an Alcoholic was. So I did this over and over. Someone ask me to go for coffee after the meeting. That's where I heard about drinking. They told me not to trey and figure this stuff out by myself. Get someone to help you who had been there and done it by the program. Someone that can love you and Not Tell you WHAT TO DO
but how they did. It's about you and no one else. We all did it different. Keep showing up. Read How it Works a Million times. Forget every thing you know and come to us as a child. It's a re-start in life. Don't quit. Bro...Peace.

Welcome to SR, Tommyg!

You made it to the 5-post reqm't! lol.

That's quite an AA history you have.

Looking forward to sharing experiences of hope and support with you!

Good to have you with us Tommyg :)

D

Wow, I really got a response. As you will see a varied response, with some passionate opinions. I've had, today, different people with lots of active sobriety tell me that a.) AA doesn't keep you sober, it's more a way to live better, and b.) AA never fails.

I'll repond directly to the post that asked me questions directly:

Alcoholics Anonymous (aka the Big Book) is a book. In order to get value from a book, you must read it and interpret the words. You might call these interpretations opinions. This is one reason there are so many sects of Christianity that claim to be biblical, words yield differing meanings depending on the reader.

Half of the meetings with my sponsor were of the format where we both had our Big Books (or sometimes the 12 and 12) open and we read together and analyzed the words. The other half, he would check my progress on the steps or simply I would talk about how sobriety was treating me.

The 4th step was a beast, with three sections (resentments, fears, sex inventory, and four columns to each section, then there was another part with harm caused to others, which seemed to be a precursor to the 8th step. There were a number of questions I asked myself, but the most important one is, 'am I being thorough'. I didn't want anything left out. So I didn't. Others were who do I resent/fear, why do I resent/fear them, what role do I have in the resentment, what harm did my actions cause, etc.

I don't confidently know a fundamental 2nd step question, but I would say, "do I believe that a power greater than myself could restore me to sanity"? That's what my sponsor asked me last time we met, anyways, since I'm back to step 2.

So your answer is basically, get a Big Book literalist sponsor?

AA's step 2 says it all for me....:yup:

No, Herc, I was just trying to see if you got lazy sponsorship. It sure doesn't sound like it. It doesn't sound like a careless 4th Step.

I'd consider the foundation of Step 1 with your sponsor. I say that only because of your consideration of nutrition and such in your original post. I needed to be convinced that I had no hope of getting it together before I got willing to let a higher power help me see the truth about myself. Fearless and self-searching and all that. You sure sound willing.

Two guys I know well both went on a few day binge right around their 9th Steps. They had been thorough as well. It happens. Both of them got a new connection with powerlessness, thoroughly reviewed what they had done so far and shored up any weak spots, and continued on with the Steps. They both have multiple years sober now.

That sums up my experience. I was sober, in AA, doing steps and service, but still "powerless with a choice." I relapsed over and over until it sunk in that I had lost the power of choice.

I see. Thanks for all of your support, everyone. Hopefully, I can call this last time the last time.

Hang in there!! You can do this!! hugs <3

Hi Herc,

The key for me was accepting that I was a alcoholic and reaching out for help.

There's a lot of common sense involved as well.

Herctrock,
I think the first thing you have to be clear about is whether or not you are actually ready to lay all the junk down...If you kind of want to but you're not completely ready that may be the cause of your relapses...Other than that,if you are completely ready you then have to be willing to accept some days that are less than comfortable in name of reaching a more comfortable place with you r sobriety...good luck

wow, this old thread. nice!

Accept you have a problem and vow to solve it.
A single activity or program is not enough to solve the problem in my opinion.
Re-invent yourself, do new things, new challenges, new foods, new friends, newer goals...rewire that brain completely and keep moving forward positvely.
The past is behind you, all you can look and work out is a bright and positive future.
Good luck

just letting folks know Herc has not been on SR for 18 months.
Hope hes doing well tho :)

D

Hi there, stay with the right people. Stay with long term sober people.

I think that is the best answer. Ive fallen off a couple times... usually what causes me to want a drink is too much caffeine or cigarets . Exercise is key when you have a huge urge

:)

I wrote you this really long response and then erased it. A smile was put in its place. I have heard over the last few days that, it takes what it takes. Sometimes we have to experience the worst of the worst in order for us to fly right. God knows, I never wanted this to happen, but this last relapse has been the worst of my life. If i continue, I will die or go to prison. I will lose everything. Its not good. So, I am ready to listen.
I think that is the key. Listening.