Hello everyone. I am new here )
 

Hello everyone, I am new here and am looking forward to talking to many people, gaining help, and giving help.

I thought I hit bottom a bit ago with an arrest after my wife and I got into it...apparently not.

Currently, I am not Sober, 3 weeks later.

I have no defense, and make no arguments as to what happened the night i was hauled off and put in the drunk tank for the first time in my life, and honestly, I don't remember any of it, any of the courses of my action that led me here...I blacked out.....I had bottomed....until I got out.

As I write this I realize this is a rather long story, please bear with me, Ill shorten it =))....

Most recently I have been in marriage counseling with my wife (failed imo, I chewed our counselor out after she engaged me instead of listening) and have visited several local AA meetings until one fateful night that I came to conclude that it was....IMO...a "church group".

While I don't have any issue with anyone who goes to church, I personally am not one that is willing to be taught how to think and as such, church is not my way to go. I am a free thinker, more along the lines of budhism, spiritualism and overall whatever I want my religion to be. Going into AA, I had a set mindset as to what it was, and never realized that 6 / 12 steps involved god, and with my beliefs it just didn't work together. Needless to say when our marriage counselor engaged me on this fact, her and I got into it, and I left our session, never to return again. We continue to find another one.

I since have scheduled a meeting with an outpatient service for an "assessment" next week.

I begin the detox segment at least 3x a week as I try to pass through. I have detoxed by my self alone 5 times before (before ever realizing I was detoxing as it coincided with a 'biggest losser' contest at work and I attributed the symptoms to lack of calories....a mistake that earned me the nickname 'twitch' to which I couldn't explain at the time, but know better now.

My last attempt to stop was a 3 day stretch...Thur, Fri, Sat. by Saturday I couldn't drive, and with my wife 9 month's pregnant, she felt she couldn't drive and I pulled into a safeway and bought some bananas, and two 24oz beers, which I guzzled promptly when I got home w/o her knowledge, because as I thought it....she cannot drive, and I can drive much better w/o detox going on and the usual "oh I can stop anytime gig"...which I have several times in the past year, and come out on the other side fine, not realizing then it was a detox period. To me at this point my brain says I can stop...and drops the craving....but my body says ...oh no you don't!!! In the past, my mind has won out, but now my physical ailments has suffered my brain, and I continue on with a little bit.

Sorry all for the longness...apparetnly I have a lot to say, and a lot of ground to cover. If you have any questions, I feel comfortable here...as opposed to some AA meeting I have frequented over the last 2 months. I will try and post a daily update, as I am already feeling it's benefits...but where do I post it?

=me )) Thanks for reading my novel ))) :c032:

Hi ThePath2Sober and welcome. I have spent a lot of time viewing this site and posted when I felt led. I thank all who post here...It has helped and encouraged me beyond my expectations.

welcome!!!

Keep coming back, you'll find a lot of support here.

Hello, and welcome to SR
congratulations on your sobertime!
you have found a great place full of information and wonderfully supportive people.
glad you found us - keep posting:)

Hi and Welcome,

You can continue to post your updates on this thread if you like, or you can start a new thread anytime you like.

You will find lots of support here!

Well I am impressed by the amounts of posts already. I feel rather at ease here, as opposed to a face to face meeting where I feel a bit more self conscious. Thank you all. ))

ANGELINA243...I would be interested in PM'ing our story.... TY

Welcome to SR.

Glad you joined us!

Welcome! This is a great place to be.

Welcome! I've only been lurking/posting here for about a week, and it has helped so much, to share and to listen to others share. When I feel weak or tempted, I log in and read through a few posts, and whether a little or a lot, it always helps. A great resource for people with a desire to get or stay sober.

Welcome to SR, the support here is amazing.

Ditto to the above...

Keep posting...:c033:

Welcome to SR, one thing I have found in sobriety is that my opinions of MANY things have changed when looking through sober eyes. Stay honest, keep an open mind, and be willing to do what ever it takes to get and stay sober.

I did an awful lot of things to stay sober that my drunken mind told me was messed up that turned out to be key to me staying sober. If I had kept my mind closed and been unwilling to do things I was uncomfortable with I would still be drunk today.

:c009: Welcome to SR, I'm glad you signed up!

Welcome, and congrats on the almost here baby!!!!

Hello again everyone, just dropping in again, having the usual detox feelings, sweaty hands, a feeling of pressure in my face and head (not a headache though). It's funny how my detox period starts at different intervals from the last drink I had, some times it is right in the next morning, 8 hours after my last drink, and sometimes it's almost 48 hours. I at least am not shaking...yet, so my productivity at work stays up (do a lot of typing, am an IT person)

My wife is off for the next 5 months with a baby on the way May 12, and I think that will really help as she is around me to watch me and make sure I don't do something stupid, and one can only find so many reasons to leave the house which I am plum out of. There is nothing in my house to drink atm, and by now even if there was my wife knows all of my hiding spots since our house is only 1800sf.

Should pose for an interesting week for me, I hope the insomnia holds off, although..I do get a lot more accomplished with more time in the day without feeling much more tirred than I usually do.

I am currently in a biggest loser contest at work as I mentioned above, 2 weeks to go, I am in the lead far as I can tell....and w/o my alcohol vice...my other vice is food, so I have a double whammy coming up, trying to resist both cravings, my only 2 vices I have...for the next two weeks.

My thoughts for now, thanks for your support ))))

Welcome and congrats on getting another day clean!! http://i66.photobucket.com/albums/h2...milies/yes.gif
Don't forget to go to as many meetings as possible and keep asking for help!!

hope you find love & strength here. There is so much to learn here!

Hey Path. So glad you're here. Keep coming back. This site is great for support and sharing and you'll get tons of feedback after everyone is done "welcoming" you. Hee hee......

Good luck on your journey. :)

Hello again everyone. Chipotle for dinner d'oh...had a craving for one or the other of my vices went with that one..

My detox symptoms are still here but I have added the shaking on top of it. I am really wanting a drink to make these symptoms go away, it's hard shaking the hands of prominent members of our business with such clamy hands, and the subsequent look of 'whoa' on top of the shaking while I write and type in front of anyone, and so it's leaning on me.

My wife and I see a marriage counselor tonight, and the big concern she has is my drinking and my big concern is the reason why I was/am drinking..... should be an interesting time given that I got into it with the last counselor after she started getting on me about my interpretation of the AA meetings I was going to, instead of listening like she is supposed to, she put a bias....but there are many people to see, so on to the next we go.

Safe travels to all )

Sober...ish

You have so many great steps ahead in the next few months! I am excited to hear about the Baby once they are here and how it is to hold them with steady hands and look at them with eyes that won't forget! I am excited for you keep us in the loop!

Hello again everyone. Counseling went well for us I think, both my wife and I really enjoy the person, and is a complete 180 from the first lady. I did however last night slip and had 2 drinks :c020: perhaps I need to ween myself away instead of trying to stop cold turkey, but I am not sure how that helps with a detox process, as I lack all physical symptoms, and don't have any cravings to speak of. Anyone have any thoughts on weening by reducing the amount by half each night?

I went to an outpatient assessment program, and after just a barrage of questions on everything and then some the person I ended up with came to the conclusion that I don't need out patient, and that I would be better off with group sessions (to me read:this forum) to which I agree, and my wife is happy with that outcome.

Safe travels everyone )

Sobered (in reset mode)

Hello again everyone. I have failed again. Couple beers down and my resistance for more is weakened. I am the type that if I have enough...there is no end in sight. I am at that point now...I want more, luckily there is nothing left in the house. I can make it through this... I know I can...wife is home in 10 minutes....that helps ))

My update.

Path

Yea, IMHO that is your AV "Addictive Voice" (that little voice that always tells you that you can have a few and stop this time), your AV will pretty much tell you anything it can to get you to take that first drink. The only thing that works for me is complete abstinence, if I had tried to "ween" myself off (as logical as that sounds), I would end up trashed. I can control not taking the first drink, but if I decided to have just 1, my AV will say "Hell Lynx, if you're gonna drink you might as well have a couple more so you can at least start to feel good". Of course after a couple more the party's on!:a122:

Good luck, :) Lynx

I could never wean myself off of it either, it just never worked for me. I would end up drinking a bunch.
Good luck to you and keep on trying, you can do it!