i'm new here, i dont know what i'm doing
 

i'm afraid these pills are gonna kill me. i cry in the shower so noone can hear me. i'm not the person i want to be.......

Hi and Welcome,

You've found a great place. We do understand you are not alone.

thankyou

i'm not sure where to go from here

Well, you might take a look around and do some reading and maybe respond to some posts - whatever you feel comfortable with.

I'm sure you will get more replies as there is lots of support here.

Hi and welcome to SR trying to be :). You didn't say what kind of pills. Maybe someone could help more if we knew? My problem was alcohol but I know how tough it is.

Have you spoken to your doctor about quitting the pills? That might be one place to start.

Keep reading and post anything you feel like posting and people will provide a lot of support. I am pretty new here too and it's been very helpful...the people are great.

Go to the two weeks and under thread to find more people who are feeling like you so you won't feel so alone. Also read through all the other threads. Post here often. Befriend people here so you know they'll be expecting you - it gives you more reason to keep from using. Take it one day at a time - one minute at a time if you have to. It's HARD, I know. This is the place to be. I'm glad you found your way here.

Here's a link to the two week and under forum.

I'll try again, here's a link?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-part-2-a.html

Hi and welcome - you are no longer alone. If you wish to get clean and sober you've found a wonderful and supportive community.

i'm sorry, it took me a few minutes to figure this thing out, i didn't realize anyone was even talking to me.there are so many that depend on me. i desperately dont want anyone to know that i take loritab in the morning just to get up n going, then towards afternoon i need more loritab and some valium to go with it. By the end of the day i need a bar xanax or two with a glass of wine just to sleep. thats not even helping anymore, it seems i always need more.

Well, that's the way it is with addiction. Whatever we have is never enough and we are always looking for more. It's exhausting.

Have you talked to your dr about stopping taking the drugs?

its not my doctor that i get them from, i couldn't possibly get enough there

But, your dr might give you advice on how to stop?

Have you tried to stop taking the drugs?

Welcome, "trying to be" You've found a great place with people who will read what your writing and nod their heads in agreement as if saying,"Been there, done that, feel/felt the same way"

I'm back on this sight after computer issues kept me away since the end of Oct. I sure have missed having people just as sick as me available 24/7. You've taken the first step, figuratively and literally,admitting you have a problem. You will find as you read different posts, go to meetings or in any communications with other addicts/alcoholics that you are not alone. Early in my Recovey in July of 2005, I thought I was the only person out there who did the things I did, had the thoughts I had and kept the secrets that I kept. It's comforting to me knowing that there are millions of other people, just like me out there. Remember, you're only as sick as the secrets that you keep. You may not be ready to admit that you have a problem to the many people you mentioned that depend on you. But you will find alot of encouragement here sharing with people who understand what you're feeling. For starters, I do.

Keep coming back, it DOES work!

right now every penny i've got is going to get my daughter set up on her own in a new state with her new job. i can't even think about using money that my babygirl might need to go to the doctor, yet i still find the extra to get my stash. it disgusts me. i'm ashamed of myself

You know shame and guilt are such a huge part of addiction.

I hope you can try to get past those feelings and begin your recovery.

i want more than anything.....................
 

i'm so sick and i know it, i stopped once a couple of months ago. my goodness, how sick i got. i shook and puked n cried for almost a week, didn't sleep a wink. thought it was ok then, if i could just kick the covers 4 a week, then what was the harm. i'd been doing it for years, so what would a couple of pills n a glass of wine hurt? and here i sit

Have you seen this section of the forum trying to be ?

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/substance-abuse/

You might find some info there. I'm not saying to leave this section though. You can post anywhere you like. :)

I'm not sure, but I think to get off loritab you should not try to do it alone. It could be dangerous. Others in here would know better. But I think you would need medical supervision to do that. I know you said that at the moment you are using your money to help your daughter, but in the long term, your health and well-being will probably be much more valuable to your daughter than anything. I hope you will try to get help. Good luck!!

Be strong. You say you want this, but how bad do you really want it? I am an opiate addict. Once and addict always an addict. But I decided to give it up after five years of use, in November. I'm not gonna lie, November sucked really bad. But December and January have been amazing. Life is completely different and for once in my life I care about myself. I went to my family doctor and was prescribed a blood pressure medication (I had already tried methadone and suboxone before, to addictive also) and I take over the counter sleeping medication called sleepinal. I was physically ill for the first week, typically withdrawls from opiates and narcotic pain killers only last for a few days, after that it is just getting use to the way your body is suppose to feel. However, if you are using xanax's and valium, benzos are a little more difficult to get off of, ecspecially the sleeping issue. However, your doctor could prescribe you with a non-narcotic, non-habit forming sleeping aid. But like I said, you have to want this, you can't make excuses or justifications to use, I have been there. And if you don't make that honest decision then it really doesn't matter how much outside help you recieve you will continue to go back to using.