trying to be

i'm afraid these pills are gonna kill me. i cry in the shower so noone can hear me. i'm not the person i want to be.......

Anna

Hi and Welcome,

You've found a great place. We do understand you are not alone.

trying to be

thankyou

trying to be

i'm not sure where to go from here

Anna

Well, you might take a look around and do some reading and maybe respond to some posts - whatever you feel comfortable with.

I'm sure you will get more replies as there is lots of support here.

gypsytears

Hi and welcome to SR trying to be . You didn't say what kind of pills. Maybe someone could help more if we knew? My problem was alcohol but I know how tough it is.

Have you spoken to your doctor about quitting the pills? That might be one place to start.

Goodnfast

Keep reading and post anything you feel like posting and people will provide a lot of support. I am pretty new here too and it's been very helpful...the people are great.

ROFL

Go to the two weeks and under thread to find more people who are feeling like you so you won't feel so alone. Also read through all the other threads. Post here often. Befriend people here so you know they'll be expecting you - it gives you more reason to keep from using. Take it one day at a time - one minute at a time if you have to. It's HARD, I know. This is the place to be. I'm glad you found your way here.

ROFL

Here's a link to the two week and under forum.

ROFL

I'll try again, here's a link?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-part-2-a.html

Rowan

Hi and welcome - you are no longer alone. If you wish to get clean and sober you've found a wonderful and supportive community.

trying to be

i'm sorry, it took me a few minutes to figure this thing out, i didn't realize anyone was even talking to me.there are so many that depend on me. i desperately dont want anyone to know that i take loritab in the morning just to get up n going, then towards afternoon i need more loritab and some valium to go with it. By the end of the day i need a bar xanax or two with a glass of wine just to sleep. thats not even helping anymore, it seems i always need more.

Anna

Well, that's the way it is with addiction. Whatever we have is never enough and we are always looking for more. It's exhausting.

Have you talked to your dr about stopping taking the drugs?

trying to be

its not my doctor that i get them from, i couldn't possibly get enough there

Anna

But, your dr might give you advice on how to stop?

Have you tried to stop taking the drugs?

serenityqueen

Welcome, "trying to be" You've found a great place with people who will read what your writing and nod their heads in agreement as if saying,"Been there, done that, feel/felt the same way"

I'm back on this sight after computer issues kept me away since the end of Oct. I sure have missed having people just as sick as me available 24/7. You've taken the first step, figuratively and literally,admitting you have a problem. You will find as you read different posts, go to meetings or in any communications with other addicts/alcoholics that you are not alone. Early in my Recovey in July of 2005, I thought I was the only person out there who did the things I did, had the thoughts I had and kept the secrets that I kept. It's comforting to me knowing that there are millions of other people, just like me out there. Remember, you're only as sick as the secrets that you keep. You may not be ready to admit that you have a problem to the many people you mentioned that depend on you. But you will find alot of encouragement here sharing with people who understand what you're feeling. For starters, I do.

Keep coming back, it DOES work!

trying to be

right now every penny i've got is going to get my daughter set up on her own in a new state with her new job. i can't even think about using money that my babygirl might need to go to the doctor, yet i still find the extra to get my stash. it disgusts me. i'm ashamed of myself

Anna

You know shame and guilt are such a huge part of addiction.

I hope you can try to get past those feelings and begin your recovery.

trying to be

i'm so sick and i know it, i stopped once a couple of months ago. my goodness, how sick i got. i shook and puked n cried for almost a week, didn't sleep a wink. thought it was ok then, if i could just kick the covers 4 a week, then what was the harm. i'd been doing it for years, so what would a couple of pills n a glass of wine hurt? and here i sit

gypsytears

Have you seen this section of the forum trying to be ?

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/substance-abuse/

You might find some info there. I'm not saying to leave this section though. You can post anywhere you like.