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-   -   I'm new and really scared (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/113640-im-new-really-scared.html)

fivealive 01-21-2007 08:35 PM

I'm new and really scared
 
Hi there, I am new to this and am really scared mainly because today was the day that I realised I had a drinking problem after a drinking binge last night where I got so down and depressed and argumentive with my mother in law, (I think I hurt her feelings really bad) so today is my first sober day. I feel that I will need all the help I can get and reading through all the threads I felt this was the perfect place to get support.

Time2Surrender 01-21-2007 08:37 PM

Welcome to SoberRecovery. You've come to the right place. I know I've gotten a lot out of this site.

fivealive 01-21-2007 08:47 PM

Thanks for that, it's just what I needed to hear.

best 01-21-2007 08:51 PM

Hello Five

Welcome.

As for MILs and hurt feelings, many times they will forgive and if not...time will heal things. When I stopped, I found so many parts of my whole life started to heal.
A wise choice you are making. Good for you.

im2sweet4u1983 01-21-2007 08:52 PM

Well youve alreadt did the hardest part and that is admitting that theres a problem you want to fix. My moms been an alcoholic for more than 20 years and I try to get her to see her problem but because shes a functional alcoholic and holds a job and runs a good home she refuses to see it. Its really simple its either yes im gonna drink or no im not gonna drink and it really takes ONE day at a time. When you think of drinking pick up a book, color in a coloring book (I find that helpful in my recovery from drugs) as a way to release stress and keep your mind off of it. Let go of people,places, songs, foods, everything that makes you think of drinking and youll be ok. Determine your triggers let everyone around you know them and avoid them at all costs and remember its a simple answer either youre gonna drink or youre not gonna drink. But dont be scared be happy you can see what needs to get fixed. AA meetings are good and so are forums just like this. Coming here when you get an urge will take your mind off of doing it and get you onto something else for awhile. Find a lot of hobbies.

fivealive 01-21-2007 08:59 PM

You guys are awesome, it's 6pm my usual time for drinkies but talking to you guys I'm not even craving it, and I like the idea of colouring in to take my mind of it. Thanks

StagebearNJ 01-21-2007 09:02 PM

Sometimes when it feels worse it's getting better..
 
I'm relatively new on this board because I'm dealing with a different type of addiction...this time. But I have been down your road. I am also an alcoholic.
I got sober, alcohol wise, in 2003 and have not touched a drop since. Prescription drugs, which were legit and needed, got me here today, but that's a whole other story...

A few years ago, I started an email attack on an aquaintance, believing (in a drunken rage) he had harmed me. Because I had many friends in his circle, my attack was successful and folks turned on him. Today, that same guy and I are working side-by-side on projects again and are able to laugh ay my drunken tirades (Okay, not laugh...smile). But it took time for him to be aware that the real me was not that hurtful. I imagine, I hope, your MIL may have a shorter turn-around time.
Yeah it gets better. I chose AA for a good while. Should have stayed around there longer...
Don't know your gender and don't want to be inapropriate, but I'm here for you, too.
Stagebear

GlassPrisoner 01-21-2007 09:23 PM

Welcome !

Ah, the remorse !

I remember waking up, looking around......Thinking to myself-Hmmmm, nothings broken, everything seems it's place. Kids don't seem mad....

You don't have to feel that way ever again if you don't want to.

Good Luck and God BLess !

ayla zaire 01-21-2007 09:32 PM

welcome.......you have found an amazing forum......everyone is so kind and supportive, it has changed my life and been a key factor in my recovery.......

i did not drink....vicoden was my doc.......but my mother did........and she had two years sober after 40 years of drinking......if she can do it, anyone can..............good luck to you, you don't need to be afraid anymore, you will find friends here......and they will help you through this......if you need anything, pm me, i'm here often.......


good luck to you, and remember, you have a choice........you CAN choose not to drink......and if it get's hard, choose not to drink for the next hour, and take it a little bit at a time.......try not to think of the days and weeks to come right now......take it a minute at a time if you need to.....and find all of the support you can......the future will take care of it's self......just don't drink today........and today will turn into tomorrow and so on....one day, one hour, one minute at a time....that was the key for me......

hope3 01-22-2007 02:49 AM

1 Attachment(s)
Welcome fivealive, I've beeen sober for a short 56 days, but it seems like a life time ago.

There is a lot of wonderful people here, and this site has been a big part of my recovery. Not just the people but the knowlegeas well. I suggest surfing around the different forums for information, and if your ready start writting a list of all the reasons you want to quit drinking and any time you feel the urge to drink, look at your list, or color.............

Best wishes, hugs hope3.

CarolD 01-22-2007 03:34 AM

Congratulations for seeking answers to your drinking
Welcome to SR!

Anna 01-22-2007 04:32 AM

Welcome and I'm glad you found us!

TamTam 01-22-2007 05:26 AM

Welcome to SR- You will find so much love and support here. That morning after feeling was awful, I know. You don't have to ever feel that again. Just one moment at a time. When it starts to be too much, come here- breathe and post.

Best of luck

parentrecovers 01-22-2007 05:43 AM

welcome, fivealive! k

lostmdboy 01-22-2007 06:04 AM

welcome five alive
 
I am new to recovery my self. This is a great place to come when feeling down. I do not think I could have made it with out this sight

"I remember waking up, looking around......Thinking to myself-Hmmmm, nothings broken, everything seems it's place. Kids don't seem mad...."



Hey Galss prisoner, what you said about waking up wondering really hit home. I usualy would be at work before the famally would get up. So I would sit and wait to see if the wife would IM me, or call. The longer it would go the more worried I would get.Wondering what aI had done the night before. I just do not know how I lived that way.

gettingbetter 01-22-2007 06:12 AM

welcome, you are among friends, view, listen, learn, and keep posting. you will be helping yourself as well as everybody that helps you.

im2sweet4u1983 01-22-2007 07:50 AM

oh and another idea if he urge to drink gets really bad put a poker chip in your mouth and when it melts then you can drink I think thats something they do in AA I met a guy who did it once

Ryan K 01-22-2007 09:14 AM

Congratulations on completing the 1st half of Step 1!!

While it is good you are here, it has been my experience that actual meetings with people you can interact with face to face are most helpful. One thing that helped me allot was getting some phone numbers, and a sponsor, then 2 sponsors.

I know for myself that I do not have to stay sober the rest of my life, but I CAN if I want to. For me, having to do something just makes me fight it. Some days are tough, but I get through it. This Saturday I celebrated my 1 year birthday with my home group. 1 year, or 50, it's all the same, it's that DAY that matters. If I don't make it through the day I'm on, then I'm right back to square one. I must admit, it feels good to measure my sobriety in years, which will be "official" 1/23 God willing.

My point, is we only have to make it through today. Some are rough, others easy, but when it feels like I have to give up, I JUST WORRY ABOUT TODAY, and not become overwhelmed with the prospect of a lifetime without alcohol, or any other drug.

GlassPrisoner 01-22-2007 09:18 AM

Welcome.

Lot's of support here.

And, I second the face to face suggestion.

Good Luck God Bless

fivealive 01-22-2007 11:00 AM

when does the guilt stop?
 
Hey thanks guys for all the support but it's only been one day and I had the worst night sleep of my entire life, or at least that what it felt like. The guilt was so overwhelming and not to mention the sweaty skin. I do have the support of my spouse but that only made me feel like I was such a self pitying, sad person, so when does it get better?


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