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Originally Posted by OnceNice Good luck on the job hunting, NTBESober. I know I should be thankful, but most of the time I'm not. Hence the name OnceNice. I was smarter when I was a kid. Growing up is a drag, wish we could have started old and got young. |
Wow, Rose, I love that concept...just think, the things sagging would get firm, the wrinkles would diminish on their own, the gray hair would get dark, we'd be oh so much wiser at the age of 25...hmmm. I think I'll ponder that one a little further! |
DID I SEE SOME NUDITY ON HERE...LOL I CANT SEE NOW...LOL ROSE.....What a lovely name to give a child.....when you were born you must have resembled such beauty that ur folks could only name u ROSE. : ) You know when u go to the store and see lots of flowers to choose from? Altho there are many to choose from...the rose is by far the most beautiful...and for what it represents...LOVE....when we give a rose to someone ..whether its a special occassion, birthday, anniversary, birth, mothers Day...and the wide variety of colors that are available.... PINK, RED, YELLOW, PURPLE, GREEN....AND ALL THE MIXED COLORS... Each colored rose stands for something....like Yellow mean peace, red and pink for love and u know the rest.... An you imagine all that resprents ur name...ROSE.....PEACE, LOVE, CALMNESS, AND SOOO MUCH MORE..... You, Rose are a joy to this recovery community here in SR....Don't ever think of urself less than or that u r not worth it, because u r.... I wish for you continued growth and happiness in ur recovery as each day comes to you. : ) Love and peace sent to u all the way from Houston. |
Gee Sharon, I'm blushing. My face is as red as a Rose. Okay everyone That's my middle name. My first name is Debra. Yes Debra Rose. Now dancing on table three, doing the Balloon dance is DEBRA ROSE. Well, A girl can dream. I don't think I'd be getting many dollars. Just a couple of free coupons to a fitness center and maybe some diet plans placed in my G-String. Okay, I'm getting off track. |
He ..he..he...you crack me up |
First off congrats on the 35 days!!! I can relate to your frustration of gathering some time and sobriety and then the insanity of going back out, again and again. I'm sure many of us here can... I'm just grateful that we have a place like this to come to and vent, and also get support etc. I can tend to be blunt and sarcastic at times, I guess it's a side-effect from so many years of working with "at risk youth". Today is day 53 for me, and I have made the conscience decision and commitment that I don't want to drink nor use. I know I can do that today, and I'll worry about tomorrow when it gets here. Hang loose, Doc. |
What's up Doc? Well like I said. Sometimes touch love works. I'm just such a nervous person. I tend to navigate toward negative statements. You know likes the ones taht say: "maybe you should study more and continue to drink" Stuff like that makes me feel bad inside. Maybe that is what its suppose to do. But I never think that I belong. I don't know all I can say is to be honest. I want to drink, I liked drinking. I didn't get into trouble and I really didn't have too physical withdrawals. Its like anything else in the world. You tell me no, I want it. Like a diet or a job. I just drink alone. And having some mental issues with it is always a drag too. I think way too much, and I try to help people way too much and put them first. Then go home and want to forget. My shrink says I'm an alcholol abuser. When I tried to do myself in and they put me in the nut house. I had no withdrawal symptoms. Even they questioned it. Buy my physician told me that depression and alcholol is a big DRAG and can be very very dangerous. So, I'm trying. But I'd love a beer. which makes me kinda mad. I never ever did anything in moderation. I work too much. Then I goof off too much. I eat too much, then I starve too much. I drink too much, then I can stop and not drink at all. I'll procrastinate too much and then I'll be obssessive. Right now, my stomach hurts because I"m constantly eating vegetables and fruit. Sounds good huh, Well, I eat a bag of carrots in a day an entire stalk of celery, one green pepper four apples, one grapefruit and three oranges, No other food unless its starburst or skittles. Not good. I went from beer to a billion cups of coffee. I believe Im addicted to my mind and my thinking but I don't know. As some would say I haven't committed to being powerless over alchohol, but I truly think I'm powerless over everything. Its all a chore to me. That was depressing. Sorry. |
Originally Posted by OnceNice I like everyone. Ha. I never like anyone. But today I'm nice. Hmm. Debra Rose is nice!:ValA006: Lets hear it for the girl on table 3, whoooo hooooo:dance1: : :ValA014: |
OnceNice, nothing to appologize for! I can soooo relate to what you are saying... It really pisses me off that I can't party and drink! I love to party and drink, but I too can't seem to do things in moderation. When I drink especially it's like someone flipped a switch in my brain and I become my ugly, evil twin... One is too many and 24 isn't enough. I really wish I could have a brewski or two like a "normy"... It's sad, but I resent the fact my Wife can have a wine cooler and then stop. But, nobody ever said life is fair huh? She has her challenges in life too. I was sharing with one of my students that has an alcohol problem about this very same thing, and it really made me realize how much it pisses me off that I can't drink normally, but also how grateful I am that I am clean and sober today... Hang loose, Doc. |
I just want to do ANYTHING NORMAL. If you look up abnormal in the dictionary there's a picture of Debra Rose on table three. Ha. Oh well. I just want to do anything, anything normally. Last night my sister and I were talking about everything, religion, politics, war, the country. She said "I wonder what God is thinking up there" I said he's thinking: "What the Heck was I thinking Giving them All Free Will" Ha. |
((( debra rose )))) We all do the best we can.. But you're doing better than you think you can and that's a lot to be proud of. Your recovery has been so interesting to read... not just another roller coaster of emotions... it's such a inspiration for others in early recovery to reach out with what they have to get what they want out of this best of all possible lives. Happy 35 days! Nose pickin or not you are still on your way to side stepping your past and being present on a daily basis for your future. :Val004: ps. I can't get the nose pickin smiley either....:c005: |
:e088: there I got it... |
:C023: :C023: Personally I kinda like that guy it reminds me of my childhood :lmao |
Splendra can pick her nose. Well to be honest Vic, I'm in my 40s' I go diggin' every once in a while. How's that for honest in the program. That's Gross Rose. Too much information. Maybe I should change my name to Digger. Just kidding. All I've never touched my nose since I grew up. Never it all just sits n there.:C023: |
:C023: Remember peeps, you can pick your nose, you can pick your friends, but sadly you can't pick your relatives... Just an idea to dig on for today! Hang loose, Doc. |
Once Nice...I've been reading your various posts here since I first arrived in late July in the throes of alcohol detox. I've got sixty+ days now sober. I have noticed a great change in your attitude since your posts I saw back in July in your pre sobriety days. You don't seem as down on life and yourself anymore..maybe it's still there to an extent but i sure do notice a most definite positive change in your posts. Keep up the good work I also understand as others here have said about not doing things in moderation...I'll brew a pot of espresso in the morning....do I sip it slowly.....nope....I'll pop an ice cube in it to cool it down a bit and slam it like I used to slam beers. same with all the water i drink on a daily basis now....it's guzzle time...........some habits are hard to change. I'm now working up the nerve to give up smoking......I am a pack a day smoker of Camel non filters...there again nothing in moderation. Might as well clean up the whole system!! Kudos on your 35 days. Scott |
Originally Posted by OnceNice Okay, everyone. I've been posting on here since November I think of 2005. Today is like day 35 or something for me. Do I feel like a drink h#ll yeah. Do I wish I could drink h#ll yeah, but I'll tell ya something. Nothing makes me feel better than when I post on here and I get supportive feedback. I can tell those who have empathy for me and remember where I am at at this moment. When others on here can see those who are new (including myself even thought I've been on here for almost a year) and still using and/or driniking and remember and offer support w/o sarcasm. Those who use humour and kindness and ears. What a great way to help. Some of us on here have had some really lousy lives. Parents who hate us, children who disappoint us, partners who verbally abuse and physcially hurt us. All of us have a reason why we ran to our so called medication. Whether it be the bottle, the pills, or the needle. Some have had accidents and took medication only to find themself addicted. Some have had violance only to find that sometimes people just wanted them to "Get Over" so they turned to the only thing they could to forget. I love the fact that their are so many people on here that care. When I first came here, I was very worried about the sarcasm and the tough love, and the "truth that hurts deal with it" syndrome. I believe that works for some and I believe some are searching for some comfort because they never had it and need to be heard. Need to have someone understand. Everyone here, from what I have been told, has the same thing as me-- addiction. Its a great big Byotch. Its on my mind all the time. emotions and opinons come after me faster than flies on the big brown droppings of all species. But all I know is that I have 35 days. Everyday I wonder when I will slip. I have no idea the point I'm trying to make. I think I what I really want to say is. Thank you. I don't really know how to do any special pictures or colors or giant lettering. I can click on the smileys. I'm not that dumb, but that's only cause they are right next to wher I'm typing. Anyway for every post that I received. Ones that ticked me off, ones that made me cry, ones that reached out, I believe were all showing me support in some way, I thank you all. Now I've been wanting to use this smiley because I think its gross and I need to get it out of my system. :C023: :C023: :C023: "Dig It" Everyone. AWESOMEEEEEEEEEE good for you, clean 35 days must give you some feeling of empowerement!!!! yee keep up the good work |
YIPPYKIYIYEAH-mother-ucker.. |
Good Morning Miss Thang...and your 36 days !!!!!! Yay ... |
Good morning, how are you, I can relate to your post about moderation I have the same problem and not just with drinking, I think I do a lot of things in excess especially when obssessed with something, eat too much at times, then I will not eat at all or just enough to get by, and at times I have gotten into the exercise craze and when I exercise I never think I am doing enough or I am not thin enough even though I am probably at an ok weight but in my mind I think I have to lose at least 10 pounds or more, I think I have to be as thin as possible, which I guess has to do with low self esteem. |
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