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Erin 08-23-2006 07:29 AM

I'm just dropping in to say Good Morning...

I'm on my first cup of coffee, listening to the cat talk, and trying to wake. Had a lousy sleep last night!!! The cat has taken to waking me up every night between 3 and 5. Fun. Fun. Fun.

It's interesting. Feeling lonely was mentioned on another post on this site. I don't feel lonely anymore. Not like I used to while I was drinking. It's weird. Mind you I have more of a life now - I had to drop some friends but I've also gained some great ones in the past months. When I drank I isolated and I'm not doing that anymore. That's maybe why.

I figure when I meet someone I'll meet someone. I've never had trouble meeting someone in the past. In the meantime I want to enjoy my single solitary existence now. I am thinking of trying to get a job down in the States in a couple of years and it would be way harder to do that married w/kids not single w/cat.

That's my thoughts for the day. I'm going back my coffee so I can wake up.

Hope everyone has a great day!!!!

janeeyre 08-23-2006 09:03 AM

Good morning/evening!

How are you all today?

Erin, I'm on my second cup of coffee and am still feeling zombie-ish! I need to get my butt off this chair and take the dogs for a walk. That'll do it!

It looks like we're a well-mixed group of singles & non-singles, young & not-so-young, parents, grandparents, & non-parents. We can sure learn a lot from each other! I think it's human nature to think that life would be "better" if we were in a different situation. Sometimes when family life gets challenging (believe me--it can be downright frightening sometimes), I think about what it would be like if I were still single and childless--it seems like that would be such a carefree existence! But then I either read here, or talk to a single friend and I realize that we all have our "stuff" to deal with no matter what situation we're in.

I just have to "be here now"--live in the present, and be thankful for all I have.

Speaking of what I have, I now have 5 whole brand-new days of sobriety and am starting on the 6th! Made it through last night's annoying cravings with the help of you all and a chocolate milkshake. (I remember doing this the first time I got sober--at that time I absolutely lived on Cadbury chocolate bars.)

Hmmmmm. Now I've gotten to thinking....how should one "be here now" and "live in the present" when in the middle of an alcohol craving? It seems wrong or bizarre to embrace the craving. I think Carol's advice must be the way to go when the cravings happen. That's being proactive while living in the present, isn't it?

Well, time to go get busy with the day--dogs to walk, laundry to wash, garden to weed.....

Have a great day, everyone!

Jane

PS: Dreamz, is that you in your avatar?

c'est la vie 08-23-2006 09:33 AM


we all have our "stuff" to deal with no matter what situation we're in.

I just have to "be here now"--live in the present, and be thankful for all I have.
I don't think you could have said it better. I have to keep reminding myself that "I" would still be wherever I move to, or "I" would still be there if I left my family. What I need to do is accept me and my stuff, learn to love me, and find ways of improving me (and get rid of all the bad stuff). Sound reasonable?

I'm glad to see you're still here Jane!!

miss communicat 08-23-2006 10:00 AM

Hi Jane and C'est,

Love the thread today. When I get a craving, I let it move through me, or, more accurately, I move trhough IT like a wave that I'm bodysurfiung. Sooner or later the wave ends on a sober shore.

Its always been better when I relax into feelings like those than to resist them with all my will. They are shorter in duration that way. (although i have had to white knuckle my way thru a few times ttoo)

Back to the wave/bodysurfing image: If I freak out while bodysurfing, I could gulp in huge amounts of water, get tossed around and even drown.

In a quieter moment its helpful to check in with my emotional state as well as my spiritual state of mind. Usually i get cravings if I am in the middle of a situation that makes me anxious. And, actually, my whole life makes me anxious these days, so i am super glad that I have not (knock wood) yet had the urge to drink. My escapes these days are alot milder: chocolate, for sure!!!

expenguin 08-23-2006 01:22 PM

Welcome little Teiger.........sounds like you are in the right place with us crazy folk...........But we are not that bad from what I can tell in the moment.....................I sobered up when I was......27 .....Not bad for someone who is now 48.....I have 20 1/2 years under my belt now and am proud to be here.................My kid has not seen me drunk and I don't want that to ever happen.........No fun hanging out with a drunk........Today I take one moment at a time and smell the flowers .................Have a beautiful house, yard to enjoy with lots of flowers and more so.........Just grateful to have everyone in the program to hang on when I need lots of HUGS so as to forget the depression side of me.....................Hello everyone out there and those now sleeping...........Glad you are around and checking in just for today..................Hugs to everyone.....................Talk to ya all later.........................Little Penguin

expenguin 08-23-2006 01:37 PM

You know I feel like an odd ball here and most of you already know me....sort of...............I got into recovery the hard way ....I had to listen to a special friend and counsler tell me off as he didn't want to see me get any worse than I already was................I started going to recovery at age 27 shortly after I left religious life and the Nuns I was with........They were against my getting help for my alcohol problem that I knew was getting out of hand..............from there my program took off with flying colors.......But it was not a smooth road for me as depression still hung around.........................I had lots of ups and downs..................Today 20 1/2 yrs later I am still holding my own...........Depression has not totally left and my life has changed now that I have a wonderful kid and husband..........................I look forward to each day which is more that I did back when I first got into recovery...........This is one reason I'm called "Little Penguin"..........................Now that I spilled my guts out I am off on another walk and need some fresh air............................More later.....as I feel embarrased....................Love ya all .......Little Penguin

Dreamz 08-23-2006 04:38 PM


Originally Posted by janeeyre
PS: Dreamz, is that you in your avatar?

Surely is - Me with my puppy - JINGLE (well she's actually quite old now but she'll always be a puppy to me!)


Originally Posted by ces't la vie
PS Dreamz, how's that for color?

FABULOUS!!!Colour cheers me up.





MORNING HATZers

I had a hard time yesterday afternoon. I was in tears. I had the worst craving I have ever had in my 'bit over 5 months' clean. I was just struggling to get through each second. There was nothing I could do to take my mind off it....until.....I just randomly thought of what would be a good word for today - it was so weird it was like my craving just switched off and it was a killer of a craving. I'm so glad that I made it through, and I'm so glad I can share it all with you.



Word for today is
STRENGTH





Because I think each one of us has a great deal of

STRENGTH

to get through what we're getting through. It isn't easy but we're all hanging in there.
:banana:
:banana:
:banana:

expenguin 08-23-2006 06:02 PM

Hi Dreamz, love that puppy.........I will pray for STREANGTH for you today..........It is 5:59pm here and the sun is going down............What a day it has been here....But as usual I got through everything...........Just wonder about those that promise me things as they never return calls or whatever................Sounds like a push over or something..........................Life goes on as usual and I have my own life.......Today and tomarrow............Recovery is the name of the game and others that promise things don't have the Recovery game in play...................They are missing out as this is where the best friends are................My thoughts are with you all today and tonight.....Whatever time it may be for you.....................Hugs all around the world I pass on to everyone...........................Love ya all.............Little Penguin

Max Oblivia 08-23-2006 07:30 PM

Hey everybody far and wide. Oh that didnt come out right. I mean big and little. Ooops maybe that didnt sound good. We'll rich and poor, happy and sad, far and near. Ok thats good..
I am in such a bad mood...errrr. Just yesterday I was bragging about how things were going so good then whammee. Got a big bombshell today.
Even though I give God credit I am horribly superstitious. Its like a jinx thing.
If I say something about it then its going to happen. I think it started when I said something about never having a broken bone then I broke my arm the next day.
I cant really go into the details I just thought if I told all of you at least I would get it out and feel better.
Yesterday I expressed my amazement about how well everything was going.
Shouldnt have.
Ok enough of the wine----ing. Like a little cheese at least might help.
But I really am going someplace with this (I think).
So what I know is tomorrow is another day and I hope this day will pass.
Whatever challenge I was given today I must accept it and rise to the challenge.
Whatever comes of todays events I must adapt and continue toward my goals.
I look back at the days like this and they seem to fade into time. Although
at the TIME they are totally miserable.
Wouldnt it be fun to be totally rich and have that one thing outa the way.
I thing I will go drown my day in an old stinky cigar.
Max

c'est la vie 08-23-2006 10:40 PM

My HP surely is looking out for me at this moment as I log on to find Dreamz has suggested
STRENGTH
as the the word of the day.
God knows I'm going to need it today. No crisis. Just a bunch of little life bullets pelting me. We had our water heater cleaned yesterday (some annual thing required by our lease) and the guy was asking where something was. I had absolutely NO idea what he was talking about, so we never found it. He said that's fine and continued what he was doing.

Now we have no hot water. I'm so f*king pissed and my hormones are raging to make things worse. It's so hard to find strength, but I have to some how. I can't let a little hot water cause me to throw my sobriety out the window, but these are the kinds of stupid things I would drink over. It wouldn't solve the problem, but I sure wouldn't worry over it.

I need to go cry and pray for strength.

janeeyre 08-24-2006 08:12 AM

Oh dear, C'est & Max. I'm sorry you two are being hit with some of life's junk right now! I will pray for STRENGTH for you both to get through all the "little" annoyances with your sense of humor & hope intact.

Max, your poor arm! How do you feel today? Hang in there, buddy.

C'est, I would be pretty cranky without hot water, too. I hope it's working again by now. :hug:

Aw, Little Penguin--don't be embarrassed to share stuff here! I'm glad to read your posts and get to know you better. And we're ALL "oddballs" together.

Dreamz, you and your pup are so cute! Is Jingle a beagle? Maybe a basset hound? (I have a beagle and a greyhound, and just love them to pieces.) And WAY TO GO getting past that darn craving! You did it! And you really inspire me. You showed wonderful strength there.

I'm OK today, but think I'm coming down with a cold. My husband has had a whopper of a cold for the past few days, and my sons are catching it, too. Ugh. Believe it or not, our BEAGLE seems to have a cold, too, the poor little guy! (I hope it's not that canine influenza that's been going around--they recently put down all the dogs at a nearby animal shelter due to an outbreak of it. TOO sad.)

Well, I need to quit "awfulizing" this. With any luck, the rest of the family won't be as sick as my poor hubby was, and my daughter is healthy, so that's good. And our little beagle is a young, healthy dog so even if he does have that cruddy influenza he'll likely come through it just fine. So far, the greyhound is as healthy as ever. (Positivity in action...:)) Things could be a lot worse, and they aren't--so LIFE'S GOOD!

Also, one good thing about my catching a cold is that it totally removes the craving for alcohol. Even during the years I was at my alcoholic worst, whenever I had a cold or some other garden variety illness, I never wanted a drink. Kinda like a temporary safety net, huh?

Well, I hope ALL of you HATZers have a good day/night. You are all strong & admirable people.

Take care,
Jane

Jersey Nonny 08-24-2006 08:43 AM

One of the words suggested by DREAMZ reminded me of an old song by Bing Crosby...if anyone knows the tune, please sing along:

You gotta accentuate the POSITIVE,
Eliminate the NEGATIVE,
Don't mess with Mr. In-Between!!!

Sounds like you're still going through a rough time, Max...better the stinky old cigar, than that you "medicate" with you-know-what!

Gotta go...aide is fixing my lunch. How I wish I could "take a walk"...have to be satisfied with going about fifty feet each way on the walker through my apartment. Oh, well...it's better than it was a month ago.

BTW...I quit drinking at 48, and I'm coming up on 75 with almost 27 years of sobriety...but, I remind myself daily that I'm only an arms-length away from a drink, and one drink away from a drunk...doesn't matter how many days, months, or years one has. This is definitely an equal opportunity disease.

expenguin 08-24-2006 08:55 AM

Oh my gosh......What a bunch we are and I love ya all......GOOD MORNING to everyone out there in the big world we live in.....
MAX....I do hope you are feeling better and know that I can sympathize with you as I am in pain from pulling a muscle in my right are two weeks ago.....Not it is not doing any better and I have not seen anyone for it in fear that I did more than pull a muscle.........................

janeeyre.....Thanks for the words of encouragement.....You make me feel better about myself.......I am sensitive about my past and want so much to be part of the group ........Just don't want to be judged...........

raeob.....I do remember Old Bing himself....He liked having my dad around to watch over him during the Pebble Beach,Ca. Golf games way back.............Dad would bring Bings jokes home and so much more.................What a man he was back then and his songs will live on....................I am not that old and I respect my elders........You have lots to share and One day at a time with the Recovery is the way I go.........No pushing the buttons for me either..................Nice to know someone else with lots of years of recovery under their belt...............Have a wonderful day .........Little Penguin

expenguin 08-24-2006 09:02 AM

Today is going good on my end and I have a wonderful fuzzy cat that likes attention...............She is a pushy thing and that is ok..................Reminds me that I am paying too much attention to everything else except her................Still early morning here and my coffee is getting cold......Must finish it while I can and move on to the next thing in my life..................................Lots to do and so little time....................One moment at a time .....Just for today....................Love ya all........Little Penguin

janeeyre 08-24-2006 04:32 PM

Good morning!
 
...to all you HATZers on the other side of the world from north america! I hope you all have great days :Val004:

I'm off to an evening meeting, so I'll see y'all tomorrow!

Take care,
Jane

janeeyre 08-24-2006 04:33 PM

WAIT! I didn't mean "that" kind of meeting (unfortunately).
--I'm going to a Jr. High school parents' meeting.

Just you wait, though. One day I'm gonna surprise you all and go to an AA (or some other recovery program) meeting. :)

Be well!

expenguin 08-24-2006 04:44 PM

Hi everyone......I just put someone in their place and I am not sure I feel good about it.............Maybe I have been in this program too long..........No doubt I defended how I feel about the importance of recovery .............someone making a joke of recovery and looking for something like a relationship in recovery is in the wrong place? This isn't good and I need to go off and scream..............Oh my gosh...........What has this world come to these days....? I need a meeting to get this out of my head and to get my mind straight...............I have a dream and it is to live my life in Recovery one day at a time......Just for today and not for looking for that right person one day at a time...................Be honest with yourself and know why you are in Recovery..........Clean your mind of the things that distract you from doing a good program for yourself.....................This is your life here and now........................Love ya all and Hugs to everyone........Time to call it a night....................Little Penguin

expenguin 08-24-2006 04:47 PM

Please Lord, help us all tonight and give us the peace we need to see tomarrow......................Help us all understand why we are in this recovery program.............Thanks......................Hi ....everyone.....I pray you all have a wonderful night and get in a couple meetings before calling it a night.................Love you all very much and glad you are here................Little Penguin

Dreamz 08-24-2006 05:59 PM

MORNING HATZers



Now we have no hot water. I'm so f*king pissed and my hormones are raging to make things worse. It's so hard to find strength, but I have to some how. I can't let a little hot water cause me to throw my sobriety out the window, but these are the kinds of stupid things I would drink over. It wouldn't solve the problem, but I sure wouldn't worry over it.

I need to go cry and pray for strength.
I too will pray for strength for you. You're right drinking won't solve your problems it'll just create bigger ones so hang in there - we're all here for you

PS I understand how big of a deal not hot water is so I'm completely sympathizing for you right now.



Dreamz, you and your pup are so cute! Is Jingle a beagle? Maybe a basset hound? (I have a beagle and a greyhound, and just love them to pieces.) And WAY TO GO getting past that darn craving! You did it! And you really inspire me. You showed wonderful strength there.
Jingle is a beagle cross cockerspaniel - she looks mostly beagle but she had massive ears kinda like dumbo had!!! When she was little she used to trip over them when she was running, and when it was time for a drink she used to get her ears all soaking because they'd fall in her face while drinking. I love her - she's about 14 or 15 now - we got her a xmas when she was a puppy (hence the name jingle as in Jingle bells)



Please Lord, help us all tonight and give us the peace we need to see tomarrow......................Help us all understand why we are in this recovery program.............Thanks

AMEN



You gotta accentuate the POSITIVE,
Eliminate the NEGATIVE,
Don't mess with Mr. In-Between!!!
Rae - I LOVE that song - its on a commercial here is Australia advertising private health cover and it makes me smile everytime it comes on.... da da da daaaaaaaaaar da da da da da da da da


Well fellow HATZers, I have had a not pleasant morning but I'm ok. I'm starting to get really sick of one of my friends. He kinda bosses me around a bit thinks he's always right. My ex-boyfriend (who I still love very much) called me and wanted to catch up to say hi, and my friend got really nasty about the resons my ex wanted to catch up. I guess I'm getting a bit sick of people telling me what to do. I just hate being made feel uncomfortable. I try and make people happy and I love to make people smile and it seems that there are people who purposely want to see you miserable or want to control you.
I just want to let everyone know that no matter what don't let anyone make you feel anyless than a super star because all the people here are beautiful caring people and you have all made my life alot easier to live so...


YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL
NO MATTER WHAT THEY SAY
WORD WON'T BRING YOU DOWN

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL
IN EVERY SINGLE WAY
YES, WORDS WON'T BRING YOU DOWN
DON'T YOU BRING ME DOWN TODAY.

A big thank-you to Christina Aguilera


Word for today CONSIDERATION


Because to be a good friend to somebody I think you have to be considerate. You have to let them lean on you when they need support, you have to give them advice without being too harsh - I think consideration is important in every relationship whether it be friends, lovers, family. So my aim for the day is too be more considerate in everything I say and do to my friends!!!

buhda 08-24-2006 06:52 PM

I am Aaron alcoholic I am in Ohio and I was never able to control my drinking till I got the fear of prison staring me in the face!!!YES SOBRIETY IS AWESOME I ALMOST HAVE 19 MONTHS THANKS TO ALL MY FRIENDS ON HERE

HI PHINNY :Val004:


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