Have a lovely weekend away Willow, keep safe.

Happy Friendsgiving to all who celebrate ~ Thanks everyone for being here! :FallB16:

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Happy Turkey day to all My American Friends!

Happy Thanksgiving US folk and anyone else celebrating all we have to be thankful for.

Kaptn - you are so inspirational with your crafty ideas and meal preparation - not to mention your silly high energy levels! Great to hear your tales of activities and your sober journey :)

Willow - I'm sure I'm a bit late, but have a great long weekend camping trip. I'll look forward to the photos! We're thinking about going camping over Christmas - just need to find a place out bush where there are no people. All my plans of getting together with my boys have fallen in a heap (Covid border closures made it impossible to plan anything and we can't make it work now), so running away to the bush is my next best way to spend Christmas.

Charon - you are a perfectionist! Your woodwork, yard work and your cooking!

Toots - again, thanks so much for always being here for us :tyou

All is going well in my life. I just need to make sure I don't overdo this working thing - it would be easy to get to burn-out and I can already feel the signs of becoming a work-aholic again.

Take care everyone!

Coz, if you can feel the signs, then actively think of the steps you need got take to prevent getting sucked in. It is so obvious how much you enjoy your work, I can see how easy it would be to forget to live too, so if you make the plans now and stick to them, you will remain in control. We don't want you stressed to the point you either lapse in your recovery or give up the job, as you get so much benefit from both. :)

I have been writing out Christmas cards, and always write a recap of the year (personal to each recipient) and have noticed how many times I have said I'm so thankful none of my loved ones have overly suffered through this year. I realise how fortunate I am compared to others who have lost loved ones or lost livelihoods.

Keep Safe my Undie Friends

Thanks Toots - yes, I too feel very fortunate that Covid has not impacted on me too badly at all. The biggest challenge for most in my area is sticking to Covid-safe rules when we haven't had any cases near us for over 6 months - what an easy problem to have compared to many.

I do enjoy my work, so it is easy for me to pick it up after hours and on weekends. I enjoy what I do and I feel better when I get more than expected achieved. I guess it is my way of fitting in - being 'good' at something. But I also know that there is a line that I have crossed before, so yes, I will need a 'stop burn-out' plan. I am such a planner - I seem to have multiple plans for all aspects of my life.

Big hug to all the Undies and our support crew :grouphug:. Have a great weekend!

Coz, this is my perfect Christmas! “We're thinking about going camping over Christmas - just need to find a place out bush where there are no people.” :)
I love being out in the Aussie bush, with no people, it’s blissful.

After being away camping, I’m back to reality with a thump and need to get organised for my working week. I’m being very mindful to not take on too much :) I used to work too hard, but have vowed to not become a workaholic again. Coz, it’s good that you recognise the signs. Be careful :hug:

I hope everyone had a good weekend, and have a great week!

we need a Pupdate FK and Charon!

Pups are chewing and peeing and pooping everything, everywhere.

They are awesome though

Poor Ruthie - she had to get a buzz cut because her coat was so knotted - never brushed till I got her and they were just too tight and deep to work them out. On a nicer note another orchid opened. This is only it's second bloom from seedling and I think it's stunning. Only 2½ inches across but very cheerful.

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Look at beautiful little Ruthie!!! :love:

Aww Charon she looks as cute with it short as long!

FK your house sounds fun right now! I bet Christmas will be a riot with all the decorations getting 'pupped'!

Hey Purp, good to see you. :)

Beautiful charon!
Ruthie and the orchid

I have found the site of newspaper works wonders. 😁
This will be my go to decoration demolition deterrent.

Bought new rugs for in front of couches so my older chi can jump up and within an hour the pups had started chewing on one. 🤬

They will not lead me to drinking but I may develop an ulcer or 2!😀

Hello Undies!
I recently hit 160 days. WooHoo!! Some of them have been great, others quite ugly, but I'm thankful to have made it this far.

The other day I was chatting with my daughter and she joked that she didn't know what to get me for Christmas as her go-to gift was the biggest bottle of Don Julio Blanco she could afford for the past few years. I giggled and joked along telling her she could still buy me one as it would make a great paperweight and the happy banter stopped cold. She got serious and told me there was no way in Hell she was buying me booze. The sting of reality was quick and deep but I was happy to hear that she has my back on sobriety.

I've had very little AV recently but other issues have cropped up.

Where I am freaking out a bit is with my sarcastic mouth and vivid dreams. I recall when my dreams returned following sobriety and my sleep "improved". At that time, I read about dreams being so vivid for some that the sleeper has a hard time distinguishing between dream and reality in the morning, often with the fear that they had drank (or other vice). Lately I have noticed my tongue getting sharper and I have been commenting on things in ways that I used to when I was drunk; impulsive and crass. In my dreams, I pull no punches at all when I interact with people I have issues with. Even people I didn't realize I had issues with! (Ha!)
When I wake, it can take me a couple of hours to convince myself that I was dreaming. It is the same fear as the morning after blackout drinking. What did I do or say? How do I ask without upsetting the apple cart? What kind of horrible person am I with no self-control? What if I'm imagining it all and I don't have the excuse of alcohol and I'm going crazy? And on and on. Each wave wanting to deepen and darken in mood. It is as if I am trying to manipulate myself into thinking that all my troubles are because I am deeply flawed and unworthy. That despair screams for escape. To endure the mental cycle without booze is horrifying at times, can be a sheer white-knuckling event. I have yet to find a way to cope with it other than endurance and distraction. I need to find a solution or at least a coping mechanism that addresses my root cause better. Currently I take walk outside and find that a great way to relax and meditate. When acute stress hits, I become a rabid house cleaner. I am hoping for more skills as I move on. My key word there is hope.

Congrats on another day sober!

Kaptn, Have you ever had counselling? It sounds as if you have deep rooted emotional issues that are rising in your subconscious state in much the way they rose in your drunken state. I also have very vivid dreams, some that last long into the day in my thoughts as I try to deal with the reason behind them. I also used to have drinking dreams in early recovery, but rarely now. I have unresolved issues with my late father and my ex-husband, things I wished I could have said and never did. Of course, it would make no difference now, but the age old suppressed emotion leaks out. I found therapy, especially in early recovery helped. Do you ever think about why you began drinking? Is it possibly related? Think about the dreams, what are you saying and to who? Is it something you can make sense of when awake? Perhaps in the first instance, writing down the dreams as soon as you wake will help to keep it firm in your mind that they are merely dreams, but also may help you to see a pattern. I am glad your daughter has your back :)

FK perhaps you need the dog whisperer!

I did the virus test last night on the orchid I suspected. Sure enough it tested strongly positive. That one goes into the garbage as soon as it's flowers are gone. Worse, I could lose the entire collection if it spread to the other plants. Not very happy today.

An Orchid virus, Charon?

I appreciate the suggestion, Toots. I have been to counseling over the years and don't feel that is right for me at this time. It stays in my toolbox and if I need it, I will go. I don't believe anyone should have to suffer. I feel my emotional situation is transitional, part of my recovery. I'm still making forward progress and so I am doing my best to be patient with myself.
When my dreams returned, I braced for the drinking dreams, but they didn't happen. My dreams were vivid but not irregular or unusual. Those recent dreams were very different. I didn't have one last night, lets hope that continues.

I also wanted to thank you all for the feedback and support. It takes a lot for me to share personal struggles. I spend a lot of time working on sending out positive energy into the universe so it feels all so contrary to what I want to achieve. But without you all, I struggle and I feel alone. Again, I am doing my best to be patient with myself as I have no idea where the transformation will take me, I just know I'm not done. You are the best support I could hope for. It is good to have people who understand.

Congrats on another sober day!

I wonder Kaptn if the dreams are possibly symptomatic of PAWS? (post alcohol withdrawal syndrome) A few of my classmates and I began showing differing symptoms around the 3 month mark but PAWS can kick in anytime around then and after.The brain is actually altered when drinking heavily and takes time to revert to normal neural pathways, there can be many different behavioural issues in early recovery that can be related to PAWS.

Yep, Kaptn. There are a number of viruses that infect orchids, spread easily, and vegetative and floral problems. One is Odontoglossum Ring Spot Virus (that's what my orchid has) and another is Cymbidium Mosaic Virus. Those are the most common but there are a bunch of others - 30 have been identified. Some are common on tomato, tobacco, carnationj, impatiens, cucumber. They are transmitted through the sap so sterile procedures and sterile cutting instruments are essential when working with a plant. And instruments must be sterilized between plants.

I've decided that if I lose all my orchids it will just give me more time to do other things.

Well done on 160 days Kaptn, that’s awesome :)