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Originally Posted by Cococo
(Post 5853522)
If somebody has looked you up and then you press the recommended friends button then it comes up with people that have looked at your fb profile and linked friends (in common). so they have looked you up |
Originally Posted by OldTomato
(Post 5853528)
Is that what it is? It scared me that I suddenly had their faces looking at me. |
Yep, my profile is ultra private so they wouldn't have seen anything interesting anyway. :24: |
Hey everyone just a quick check-in before I hit the hay. Very busy week at work and I've been there too much. Still attending a meeting every day right now though, and reading and journaling when I can too. Without getting into the details suffice it to say today was rough--really rough. Work and all the rest of it--it was just a really bad day. Everything that could go wrong, did. Just one of those days. I left work in a huff and everything else for the rest of the day pissed me off too. It was just one trigger after another. I went and got dinner at a Thai restaurant and thought to myself, man I really don't want to be sober right now. But I want sobriety so I'm not going to drink. I drank tea with dinner. Then as I was walking back to the car I suddenly realized I was now walking past the main bar where I'd always drank which is just down the street from my job and I looked in as I passed. I had no intention of going in but I just looked in. There was a pretty big crowd tonight. The negative memories and the negative emotions and the consequences came flooding in. And I thought to myself, man I'm SO glad I'm not in there right now. The discomfort associated with drinking is actually WORSE than the discomfort of not drinking. And that turned out to be a comforting thought. Anyway, 23 days and surviving. Actually, 24 :) |
That's brilliant Violet, you faced so many triggers today and you got through them. Well done!! |
Checking in, Early day 2 at work. MAN I'm 5 pages behind every morning now. That's good though. Day 23. Had bad crazy dreams last night. I hate that. I'm starting meal replacement drink for supper tonight I think. I'm just flat out eating way too much. Think it's making me feel bad, BUT it's not a hangover ! Lol Sadie I'm sorry you're feeling bad. I saw where Sonebody said turn off the tv or cable or something. We turned off ours and just have hulu and netflix. I don't see the news, and I say ignorance is bliss. TMBI. Too much bad information. I don't feel like I miss anything useful that I can affect, and none of it helps me stay sober. That's got to be my focus, and I'm trying hard to keep it. Congrats on milestones. I feel rough today, think allergy or something taking over on the sinus infection. Swapped from Mucinex to Claritin. See if that makes a difference. |
Do whatever makes you feel better and stay sober JL. I hope your day at work goes alright. |
I'm thinking now that alcohol may have wrecked my marriage, because there's so much you don't see when you're drunk , detoxing, drunk, detoxing. My wife is so sick and hurting inside, and maybe I drank partly from it, but I know I didn't contribute a thing to help it, and probably made it worse for her. Whew I gotta get off this train of thought. I'm not so stable today. Bleh She still stays at her moms, 3 days a week, but it saves her driving time in the mornings, and her mom helps out where I can't cause I'm at work. She told me that she loves me and she's trying to get better. God it's frustrating, not being able to help somebody, and everything I say gets taken the wrong way. There's never a " right" time for us to go through the pains of getting better. I know for me it's like waking up into a bad dream, instead of from one. |
Morning all, day 17 for me. Husband's mom had a stroke and is in the hospital, it's looking like we'll be in charge of her affairs so life is about to get complicated. I'll check in when I can. congrats to all staying sober, and prayers for those struggling. . . |
I really appreciate the messages--the adventures, challenges, insights. My day is work then gym. The work part of it is going to be rough. But I will get through it, like some kind of cross between a three-legged horse, a badger, and a Tasmanian devil. And throw in a few genes from a stomping cassowary . . . . |
Eowyn - sorry to hear that! You're in my prayers. JL - we also have only Netflix and Hulu now. Working just fine. I don't post as much but I'm following your story and am proud of you for staying the course. It's great that you can share your feelings here and even though it doesn't always feel like it I'm guessing...you're really going in the right direction by not drinking, despite anything else. As Dee always says, we did this for a long time; we can't expect any other associated problems to go away in the matter of weeks. OT - congrats on a month, you've come a long way! I totally get the 30 days vs month thing, as with having babies we measured pregnancy and infancy in weeks versus months and the month is always the same calendar day. In any event, another day sober, eh?! :) I had a very terrible dream last night. That I actually said screw it - and started guzzling wine. It was so real - I even felt the mental battle begin - one side of my brain reminding me to slow down and that I would soon feel like garbage - the other side saying well you already drank, may as well go for it! I woke up sweaty and scared, and then relieved that I was actually about to begin day 17. I never believe my AV tells me drinking is a good idea. It just tells me to do it and deal with the impending consequences. It also reminds me of my OCD tendencies and tells me to be sure the bottle is emptied, and we will start at day 1 tomorrow. |
I'm sorry to hear about your MIL Erowyn. Best wishes to you and your family. D |
Eowyn I'm sorry to hear about your husbands mother. I'll pray for y'all. |
Just checking in. Bizee day yesterday and another one today. I DID walk on my treadmill for 30 minutes yesterday, but it was slow. But that's ok. Will check in later today :-) |
I didn't sleep much last night. Now it's time to get up. Day 42? Whatever Badger has. |
Originally Posted by Outonthetiles
(Post 5853336)
Hi Sadie, sorry for the late response. 1. Marriage. You're staying in the marriage because you're afraid of alcohol related accidents, and you don't want to be eaten by felines if you died alone. Not sure if you're serious about this, but here goes: if you stick with SR you'll be sober, thus eliminating drunken accidents. Only after you've been sober should you evaluate your marriage and whether you want to stay in it. Until then, you're acting out of fear, which is how people make serious mistakes. 2. Being eaten by cats: after you're sober, you can avoid drunken falls, so being eaten becomes a more remote possibility. 3. Politics (I assume that's what you're talking about): GET RID OF YOUR ******* TV, ESPECIALLY THE CABLE ***** It's all ******** and I believe that you're making yourself sick by paying attention to that crap. Just ******* throw out your TV. I got rid of TV three years ago, and even though I was barely functional due to drinking, I nevertheless felt mentally better after I pulled the plug. Especially the cable news ****, which is toxic and mentally damaging. You may be concerned about the state of the country, but you;re just making yourself sick worrying about it. Also, your preoccupation with politics is a form of avoidance or procrastination. Your only job is to get sober and stay sober, not to worry about some high functioning socieopathical politician. By worrying about that sh!t, you're just avoiding your own problems, so don't do it. Hopping off the soap box, now. |
I'm glad we can have coffee, because I sure need it this morning. For some reason I couldn't sleep. I guess the one thing that hasn't improved is my sleep patterns. I'd still rather live with Permanent Jet Lag than live as an untreated alcoholic. My life was completely unworkable. Thank God I came to my senses. |
Man I hate this. I am on a downer. I could kill for a bottle of wine. I don't know if I can nor want to do this forever not drinking. I don't think I can. Day 51 and I really fancy a glass of wine or four. I know I am an Alki and I know I can't moderate but I just want a day to drink and then get back on the wagon. |
My freaky dream last night said it all to me. God. I have a doctors appointment Friday morning. I shouldn't drink before then. I was gonna give up the sugar but I don't want Tom Omg. I am so miserable I could cry. My head is in a right run. So angry �� |
I can't do this!!!! |
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