One Year and Under Club Part 44
 

last part here:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...t-43-a-20.html

D

Thank you, Dee.

no worries Leigh :)

D

Thanks Dee for the new thread! How have you been lately?

LS I hope you feel better soon. I've found writing in a journal helpful as well as posting here when that AV is trying to justify a drink. Also making a list of pros and cons of drinking.

Super tired from womping so I think I will go to sleep early tonight!

Sleep well, BoozeFree, and all the Undies.

I'm good thanks, bf! :)

Back at work after being off poorly. ... very tired and somewhat stressed.
Am going out tonight with mr petals and work colleague and his wife for our Christmas meal in a pub. I will be made to drive....Which is a good thing so as to keep me sober but mr p will hit the beer hard and be loud and obnoxious to me on way home and at home. He will be nice as pie in front of his friends. Somehow being made to drive gets me irratated and grumpy. ...makes me think of drinking.
Then Saturday I've got the weekend away with my night school. ...usually a very drunken weekend

Will have to be careful not to allow myself to feel I deserve a wine as a treat or to make up for none tonight. Oooo my mind is a working overtime. .....

Best get up for womp....
Bye for now.xx

Wine is not a treat--it's a mess! I hope you've had a good day at work, Petals. Try to pray or meditate before you go out to let out frustrations and come to a state of peace with yourself. That way the behavior of the others won't influence you so much.

Petals, Gilmer said it so well. Wine is not a treat. It's poison for us. When you see a bottle or glass of wine or any other alcoholic drink, you might try picturing a skull and crossbones on it in your mind. As recovering alcoholics I think we naturally tend to focus on alcohol. If possible, it might help to see if you can shift your focus when you are around alcohol.

Last night at dinner I was with a drinking group (unexpected). There were 5 of us and 3 bottles of wine. I was the only one not drinking. One person got fairly tipsy. For about 2 minutes when they first poured the wine I sighed to myself, wishing I could have a glass but that thought very quickly passed when I briefly had an image of myself passed out in my apartment and going through treatment again. I happily clinked glasses with my glass of water :-)

Each time I handle a situation involving alcohol, I feel stronger. Clearly thinking about the consequences and especially picturing them seems to cement my will to stay sober. I know I need to always be mindful of that.

LS -

This time around was similar, I was directly tackling my problems of isolation and reoccuring issues with my father by moving out.

New job, new place to live nearer to some friends and a new life. Things had finally clicked.

Nope, because here I am again. Lost it all in the space of a month, maybe it was too much to try and move out there all on my own. I read on here the other day "No major changes in the first year" and I remember reading it before, maybe it was too big a change and I expected too much of myself.

You've worked very hard this past year. I think it's fantastic that you are actively addressing your issues with social isolation and family frustration. Starting a new career, getting a full time job, and moving into your own apartment are healthy, mature things to do with your life.

My life looked good on paper when I was drinking. For me, the key was to understand how I really felt about my life, my home, my husband, my friends, my job. Being sober allowed me to take a deep inventory of myself - and I felt empty, angry, like I didn't have "enough." My choices were driven by my fears and emptiness rather than by peace, love and fulfillment. I'm not saying that's every drinkers experience. That was just mine.

I drank because I am an alcoholic. When I was unhappy, unfulfilled it was a white knuckled ride, but when I began to seek peace and joy, and to be who I truly am, the work of recovery became peaceful, joyful and fulfilling.

Petals - I can relate to your concerns about the weekend. It sounds like your boundaries are screaming for you do to something good for yourself. When that happens to me, as my life is surrounded by drinkers, I try to think of something to do that I will enjoy. :)

Glee has a great idea, Petals. Do something wonderful for yourself!

Agreed!

loved your post glee-----just remember undies we are in this together. I myself am doing fine---trying to stay strong and so far so good, Have a great week-end.
Babs

^^^^^ This.

I hang out in the Class of October, 2014, sometimes; I hadn't heard from venuscat for awhile, went looking for her, found her in that Class and found a 'welcome' there. They started this practice where they would 'hiss' at bottles of liquor when they saw them; I found that so clever and even find myself sometimes hissing at liquor commercials on television.

Silently hiss at that liquor when you see it; Petals. Show it who is boss.

Do you have to attend that night school weekend????

Thanks for the support guys, it means a lot. I have to admit that I just don't feel as though I deserve doing something nice for me it seems a waste....I'm more comfortable doing things for others.
The weekend isn't compulsory but I really do need to go....plus it will be another first ticked off! I'm trying to convince myself that I will have so much more fun by being sober than I usually do after wine and the next day with a hangover!
I also need to post here more often. ... daily posts seemed to keep me focused on sobriety.
My class is pretty quiet so I may make undies my main goto thread if that's okay.
Anyway gotta pop out to buy maggots. ..... mr p is going fishing. .... hopefully with not too much of a hangover!
Back later xx

Life IS so much better sober; it took me a while to get to that 'place' but now I wonder what in the world I was thinking. You can do this, petals. show yourself and the world how strong you are.

Wow, maggots! (Shudder)! Over here they sell big nightcrawler worms for fishing.

Just wanted to check in with everyone, spent the day doing lots of little productive things and getting a handle on what to do next. I have a doctors appointment next week to go a bit more in depth about treatment options and I have a counselling service number to ring so I can make an appointment to see a counsellor.

Still fighting.

After the storm,
The sky is clear,
But the roads are wet
and the trees are broken.

That sounds good, LS!

It is good, it's been a good day. I managed to support my sister with a few things and that always does wonders for your self esteem, and she had a few insightful things to say about my situation too.

I've noticed that since I've been very honest with the family about the addiction they have been much more able to help, same with the doctors as well.