Marcher,

I know this time of year is stressful for everyone, the great news is that you've got approaching 2 years of sobriety behind you now, and the tools you've learned will help you through these times.

In my experiences using these learned tools really helps me anticipate and plan for the times that my stressors normally acted up. It's all a part of accepting who we are, who we were and who we want to become.

And of cours you know we are here whenever you need!!!!

(((Hugs))) to all of us at this challenging time of year. I now get it - even if we do not drink and do not plan to drink, the thoughts do pop in occasionally.

Marcher, thanks for your kindness in representing all of us tomorrow! I'm glad you were able to let out all the feelings.

North, that is an incredibly precious pic - perfect!

V, it sounds like that was a very unpleasant dinner. Good for you for taking care of yourself.

Marcher, You remind me of myself... If I have a safe place to express my feelings and thoughts and others understand that I do not need or want advice unless I specifically ask for it - basically I am needing respectful witnessing of the emotions I share - I am almost 100% of the time relieved of any obsessive or self destructive thought that has been planted by my AV.

For me, to keep those thoughts that trigger troublesome emotions secret or repressed, is what strengthens my AV... how it loves the dark recesses of my soul.

When I work with couples experiencing distress, it is amazing how often partners, usually male, want to "fix" the others feelings. The intentions are loving, however. But, to be actively listening is the greatest healer of dysfunctional and broken relationships.

I think, and this is just my opinion, that the need to express ourselves fully without interruption contributes to the success of online forums like SR... how I love to be able to take my time posting, how my search for the exact word or phrase is to my benefit... it allows me to understand what is distressing me... secondarily, it then allows those reading my posts to know me a little better.

North... I love that picture....they are so beautiful!

Toots: I hope you feeling better.

Bud, I did have to chuckle at your posted pictures and I do hope that issue of the doubling and tripling of posts is resolved soon.

I am so happy to report that Berkely has been accident free well over 24 hours!

He and I are working out our communication glitches, and he now sits by the front door and tilts his head and just stares at me to signal his wish to go outside. At first, I didn't understand this action, as he needs to go out in the backyard but I realized he was adapting to the fact that I spend most of my time in the living room where the front door is in sight. I think I am getting attached to him.

I know of people with diagnosed mental illnesses that have companion dogs... I bet our pets are also healing companions to those of us in recovery from substance use... giving us unconditional love and comfort when we are unable to love ourselves or feeling isolated and alone. Even though I experienced frustration at the beginning of our time together, it is awesome how now I am so happy and free from any whispers from AV.

Such thoughtful and insightful words 1Day. :hug:
I imagine the couples that you work with benefit a great deal from your wisdom.

And yes, the dogs are gorgeous North!!! :)

V xx

Lot's of testing going around it sounds like. You're all pros, you'll handle it. PM me if you need, I'll be around the house all weekend. I'm working a concert tomorrow night but will be around.

I got almost all my Christmas and grocery shopping done in one stop tonite after work. I have to exchange one item and get one more thing and I'm done. Three hours at Wal-mart. OMG, I am a misanthrope. I hate people. :lmao: By that time I had all four aspects of HALT. When I was pushing the cart to the car, the lil beast piped up: "Oh, look. A bar!"

**** u, *****.

We got this, crew. And I want to correct something. I don't have to deal with HALT anymore. Only HAT. I'm never lonely because of y'all.

Thanks, Trachy! Sorry to be the one to let you in on a little secret ... many of us hate shopping, especially this time of year ;). My sibs and I decided about 15-20 years ago that instead of sending each other gifts for Christmas, we would donate to a charity. Less stress, especially since we are truly scattered on both coasts and don't really know what the others could use or might like. No muss, no fuss :-). And someone who needs things more than we do, benefits.

That's lovely Sass! :hug:

The best thing about not having Christmas is that I don't have to go through that.
The shopping nightmare, I mean.

Hi Marchers! :wave:

Just three more days of work and then off until January 5th. I'll try to post more during my break. My holiday plan is to make a meeting every single day, watch every single episode of the Walking Dead on Netflix, and sleep at least 8 hours every night.

I've got lots to catch you all up on, good and bad, but it will have to wait until I have some more time. It's already past midnight and I have an 8am meeting to attend.

Night all!

Really nice to see you dig! :hug:

Hi again Marchers, thank you all so very much for the lovely words, messages & dog pictures! I feel a bit better this afternoon, it did me good to speak up instead of "brave it out" with a stiff upper lip. I had a good blub this morning which is most unlike me, then I repaired my face and went to work.

It being so close to Christmas some of our lovely customers are dropping off cards and the occasional gift. Prepare for a laugh: today we were given a bottle of champagne, one bottle of red and two bottles of white -- how ironic!

Now don't worry about that: I'm used to alcohol being in the house and anyway I left the bottles at work to give to our two staff next week. I took Dee's advice from the other thread and brought home some ridiculously rich chocolate ice cream, I wiggled out of something unimportant we were going to tonight and I'm taking it easy.

Thank you, all of you.

Glad you are feeling a bit better Marcher love. :hug:
Enjoy the ice cream! And have a lovely evening. ♥

V xx

BTW, V I think your sisters' and nephew's drinking at the dinner last night was probably indicative of their inability to cope with your Dad's condition. I'm glad you had that dinner with him.

I'm glad too Marcher ~ I really think that was the last dinner we will all have together.
And thank you for that ~ I hadn't thought of that at all.
It is definitely true that no-one else in my family is coping with this.

I am really impressed with all of you young people dealing with the challenges of life while living sober. :scoregood

It is great to be one of you. :ring

Marcher, love, sorry you had a moment. Glad you knew your strength. Can I buy you a cookie?

Y'know what? I hate, I mean HATE shopping for me. Even groceries. But I love shopping for others. I love giving presents. I could do Christmas without getting anything and be in bliss.

You can certainly buy me a cookie Trachy, I'll have a macchiato with it please. When we finish I'll treat you to some of the coffee granita I made this evening, I'll have enough spoons for all Marchers.

Trachy, you have a delightful spirit. It sounds like you are one of those amazing people who have a "crusty" exterior and a lovely, warm and caring inside :-)

V, yes, so good that you could be there for your dad! I'll bet that makes you feel even better about staying sober!

Marcher, I'm so happy you followed Dee's advice! You had been sounding "under the weather". Although I wasn't worried that you would drink, it did sound like you may have felt a bit overwhelmed.

Grtgrandpa, we're happy you are part of us!

As for me, fever finally seems to be on the downswing but deep cough is no fun. Hopefully ok by the 25th!

I hope you all have a good day!

I hope you feel better soon, Sass. :hug: