It sounds like everyone is doing really well! Day 20 for me...I think my body is confused by my intake of seltzer water. I can have a full glass in front of me and my mind still goes, "Uh, don't you need something to drink?" Is that weird?

By the way, sobering up in October has wreaked havoc on the Halloween candy supply. I was never much of a dessert person, but Hershey stock is probably skyrocketing now...

Weatherman, looks like we'll both turn the corner on three weeks tomorrow!

Chosingsober: those times apart from my wife are some of the toughest for me as well, because I was kind of a secret drinker. When I'm away from family and there is no one keeping me in check it can be hard (for me). Stick with it, and check in often here.

I'm on the evening of day 5 here. Man these afternoon/evenings are kind of tough for me. I don't know if it's just a case of "the Mondays" or what. But today has been tough with the AV whispering in my ear. Not going to give in though.

I'd love to be able to type well, but there is a overly snugly kitten vying for my attention. She seems to be intent on laying against my chin.
She isn't mine, but I'm finding her presence and purr very soothing in a way I haven't felt in a good while.
Had an extremely hard day at work. Pulled 14 hours and still had a mountain to do. Exhausted. Frustrated. Stressed But sadly not abnormal in my work. I've gotten very used to it

I should be sound asleep but I'm finding sleep difficult this last few days.
I only got two hours last night


I crashed at a co workers place cuz I was too tired to drive home and we have to be back at it in six hours.

Was offered a beer and I just said no thanks. No drama. No overthought. Just a simpl politeno.
This tiny kitten is more relaxing than any drink ever was.
But. It's now chewing on my back pack.

I'm so tired. So happy. So peaceful.

Morning everyone

Had a drinking dream last night...Someone handed me a glass of champagne and I took a swig and then thought "What the hell am I doing? I don't drink!!!" and I put it to one side and went back to killing zombies. Bit of a weird dream :)

Day five here as well, I've been up since 4 am. It's amazing! I woke up sober, without a hangover! Waiting for it to get light so I can take the dogs for a run.

Wonderful as well to wake up and not find the kitchen is a mucky disarray (I tend to cook elaborate meals while drinking, then forget to eat it and everything is congealed on top of the stove, ugh.) A clean stovetop, clean counters, I remember every bit of what I did all day yesterday...it's a beautiful thing.

Good morning fellow sober Octoberites! :)

Pushkin, I had a drinking dream too! Augh! In mine, I was sorting through a box of junk, drinking like it was water, but knowing that it wasn't. In the dream, my ex -fiancé, ex-best friend, alcoholic father, and boss showed up. It was awful. My mind and heart are having to deal with many thoughts and emotions that have been hiding for so long. I logged into here hoping to shake it off and focus on forward progress.

Day 11 is new territory for me. I haven't stomped these grounds since I was 14!
It feels different this time with SR in my toolbox, like a secret weapon.

Keep at it, Octsobers!

Stevie, I am loving my clean stovetop and sink, too! It's so nice to wake up in the morning and come home in the evening to a clean house. This extra energy is golden.
Enjoy your early morning run!

Welp it just started raining really hard, poo. So we might not get that run, unless I just take the Labrador - the other two act like I'm punishing them if they're out in the rain!
I'm alternating between being very tired and irritable to having bursts of energy. I'm all over the place right now.
But I've really gone into a drinking tailspin since October last year so that's to be expected. I've let so much go, including my house...I've probably done more cleaning, organizing and fixing up in the last five days than I have in the last five months. It's great.

Looking forward to day 4. Still not sleeping well and finding it difficult to fall asleep, but overall feeling pretty good and thankful for SR. Off to work. May catch a meeting after dinner if time allows.

Great work, Brighterdayz! I love your username. :)

It is amazing how fast I could drink an alcoholic drink, especially if chilled like a beer, or cocktail, or white wine, but even my favorite red wine, compared with how long a glass of seltzer can sit by my side. I do drink lots of regular water, but I was thinking about how quickly I could consume the alcohol vs the seltzer I have swapped out for it. Your post reminded me of that thought.

Good to wake up to another sober day here. Still touchy with my daughter who is bning ver stubborn, as am I. I do think she needs to apologize to her father and I for her behavior this weekend, and she needs to do it well, not in a text message(Ugh, hate that all kids communicate with text only), but face to face, with some understanding of what she did that was inappropriate. You know, have a good talk and hug it out. Not possible with a text.

So, that has me down and sad, but will plod along with healthy distractions and maybe some ice cream. ;)

Oy, Stevie, I hear you on letting the house go. My husband also wastes a lot of time drinking then sleeping in on weekends. Our house needs purging and a deep cleaning. Plus there is all the stuff that any house needs coming up of 15-20 years, like some new carpeting or flooring. But we have too much stuff around. So, I plan to dig into that too. I am very tired still, though.

If I get back to daily exercise, rather than sporadic, I think I will perk up. Sometimes I am just so tired, it is hard to force myself.

For me, I think my husband does not like losing his drinking buddy. If I do drink, he brightens up and ends up drinking with more abandon. He knows I go through fits and starts with abstinence, and I have had big moments in the past where I have talked to him. But he does not hear it. I think, because it may mean facing his own demons. He is not a good talker about deep matters. Great father, very invovled, easy going, but not deep, and not into uncomfortable topics and an avoider of conflict. Is it suprising he grew up with an alcoholic father where it was all hush hush around the kids?

Kids. My older child is 15, and we discuss drinking, of course, due to her age. She thinks my drinking is more like overeating. Bad habit, could be healthier and she knows I try to avoid it at times, as part of a larger effort to be healthier, eat better, exercise, avoid the bad foods and drinks. Much of that is actually true. I deal with food binging too at times. Not crazy, but more than anyone needs of some things at times. like chips, or ice cream.

So far, the kids do not seem to see either my or my husband's drinking as a very bad thing. I think, if they compared notes with friends, they would suddenly see it as excessive for sure.

Hopefully I can finally make a permanent change there. But one day at a time right now.


Sorry for the serial posts, guys. Just catching up on all the posts. Was a busy day on here, yesterday and I was out all afternoon with my son. So, responding to ones that stuck a chord or were addressed to me.

Good Morning all, a cool sunny start to day 9, Went to bed early actually slept all night and did not even think about having a drink. At one point I went to the fridge and grabbed a water , a nice cold beer sitting right there looking at me, looked at it for a second and I thought about how bad I would feel if I drank it and I would probably have drank the remaining 5 and then looked at the liquor cabinet for more . This post would be a lot different and I would feel like crap which would spark another day of drinking to feel better. What a vicious cycle I call it circling the drain . Feel much stronger by not having that drink, I know that one is to much and 2 is not enough. Well I have a lot of work to do on the cabin,today, installing windows, a new front door and some stone work on the fireplace I have put it off The last time I was up I did not get it done due to drinking and not wanting to or really in no condition to. I enjoy doing that type of work. again that little bottle took that away from me for a while , well not no more. Hey facing future thanks for the post. Got to go Dakota wants to go for a walk and play ball, and so do I. Have a great Sober day . Paul

Good Morning Class! On Day 2 today. Usually I can get to day 2 and be fine. Tomorrow will be the real test.

Thanks for the reminder! Almost like I was on auto pilot. No thought or consideration when the drink was in hand.

Slept better last night. Have a busy day today which is good.

So glad to hear everyone's stories. They really help keep me going strong. Have a great day everyone!

Half victory, I want to see you do this. I know you can. That is exactly how I started. Quit one day then 2. Then crash. Then 123, then crash. I started feeling better when I made it to 4 so I went to 5. Crash. 2 weeks, crash. And deep regret. Now here I am day 23 and I wouldn't trade it for anything. Don't look too far ahead. Focus on, well, one day at a time. The best feeling is climbing into bed at night knowing I was victorious another day.

Bit of a tiny personal victory to report.

I’m off back to Ireland for the weekend soon and I have been dreading it. It won’t be the first time I’ve gone home and not had any alcohol and it wouldn’t usually be a big deal but AV has been going into overdrive. “You’re going to feel totally left out”...”You’re going to ruin everyone else’s fun”...”Why can’t you just be normal”...The usual rubbish it spews.

I’ve been making plans with my best friend and I’ve been putting off saying anything about not drinking. Every time she mentions wine or the pub or anything like that I just skirt around it – classic pre-relapse behaviour. I know exactly where it’s leading – I say nothing and then I have nothing to explain if I pick up a drink.

So I bit the bullet – when she made a joke on e-mail about a drinking game I sent back a breezy reply saying I wasn’t drinking but I’d happily pick her up off the floor if she liked. And she sent a jokey reply back about how that was terrible because now I’d remember all the rubbish she spouts and she’d be mortified and that was it...totally normal and fine and now I feel much much better.

I know it will still be challenging but I’m so chuffed that I was able to recognise exactly what my AV was up to and to scupper it.

Day One for me everyone. I am starting over today, but feel that I can now do this. I am embracing AA and their ideas and realize that I really am a control freak. It is no wonder I can't stay sober on my own.

One day at a time. I am taking it slow from now on.

brickthrowing: Love the snuggling kitten. How cute.

:ring

Fellow control freak fist bump :)

halfvictory & Cecilia44 you can do it.

Yesterday went well for me. Taking each day one at a time. day 9.

I'm so proud of you all! :hug:
Day 5 here, that feels pretty good. I haven't gone this long since August. I had 16 days then. And have only done 2 or 3 days since then.
I still have a sick little one at home. I think he will be good to go back to school tomorrow though. I finished a knitting project yesterday and started a new one to keep me busy. ;)

Awesomeness. A day at a time. 9 days is great. Double digits tomorrow! :)

Again.
 

so, back to day one again (had two drinks last night, but stopped, and didn't have a hang-over). Just talked with my new "sponsor", and she wants me to call her every day, which is good for my accountability, especially since hubby has work dinners every night this week.

Someone on here posted about getting sober in October. . . . yeah, I bought 2 pounds of halloween candy, and have already eaten quite a bit of it. I know I'm going to have to deal with my sugar cravings at some point . . .. but it's kind of fun to allow myself to eat what I want (my deal with myself until I get 30 days sober - eat what you want, THEN cut down on sugar). I had poptarts for breakfast. Haven't had those in like 10 years.

I'm also loving all the different countries represented here. Fun to hear everyone using different local colloquialisms. All you Brits referring to your "pints" etc. And someone said "chuffing." Is that like "chugging?" Anyway, love it.

so2014' I'm so glad you didn't let that little stumble get you off course. Sounds like you really have your determination. I'm proud for you.
BTW, I also enjoy all the different regions represented in this common effort. I hope your day is a good one!

Went to the A.M. meeting this morning
 

Even though the daily reflection was "Nothing grows in the dark" a lot of people shared about vigilance... which is where almost all of my energy goes every day. I don't have a job, or any money to go anywhere or do anything, so I'm at home like a hermit.

Today would have been the 1 year anniversary at my job, if I hadn't gotten "let go."

My AV keeps telling me that the day would go by so much faster if I'd get drunk and pass out.

So... I spend some time here reading, I crochet (almost done with my blanket), and I do some cooking (for lunch I made some yummy salmon cakes with some leftover salmon filets).

I'm eating way too much.

But I'm not drinking.

Day 12.

ClubMed, I'm unemployed, too. It definitely makes it harder when there's all this free time to contend with. Even if I see each of my friends once a week it still leaves me with just hours and hours to kill. Mostly I've been doing yoga once or twice a day and then scouring the internet for free or very cheap events to get me out of the house in the evenings. I should probably start crafting, too, that sounds like a good way to spend time!

Ok guys. AV hitting a new low right now. Trying to make me feel guilty for giving up drinking (the catholic guilt, ugh!) Making me feel sorry for myself. I'm not giving in of course. Just surprising. Afternoons around 3pm seem to bring on thoughts. Pushing though. It shall pass...

So 2014.....Chuffing means letting go of a botty burp in this part of the UK. and something a bit worse in the south (as I found out to my embarassment once)....

Day 3 done here, again! still keeping on, glad to hear you all are today...

Had a medical prcedure today, and after the AV went straight for 'you deserve a drink for coping with that'...so i bought steak instead!!! woooooo... much yumness!!! And no alcofolicks!

You will be beaten oh alcoholness of doom....