Class Of February 2014 Part 7
 

We continue from here:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-6-a-20.html

D

Thanks Dee. I was thinking about you today bc I hadn't seen you posting. Glad you're feeling better.

So I am sitting here kind of agitated and feeling blue and realized I'm annoyed with myself for eating so much junk today (and the past few weeks). I had three cupcakes today, plus a lot of candy and all other kinds of junk!!!

My healthy eating starts tomorrow. I did buy a lot of healthy food that I used to eat when I was bodybuilding at the grocery store today so it should be good. I just have to remember not to fall back on food for comfort as I tend to do as an addict.

Other than that, staying sober. Tomorrow makes day 28!

Good Morning Febbies!

How is everyone today? I hope everyone had a nice weekend. We actually stayed in all weekend. I went grocery shopping on Sat. and my wife ran a few errands yesterday. Otherwise, we just hunkered down. My son and I played (the board game) RISK on the PS3. Kind of stumbled on to that looking for something to do. It was a good geography lesson for him as well and fun to play again.

Had a few urges that I manage to control.

My new hobby/challenge is to budget money better. We never had a budget and we waste a lot of money. So, I came up with a plan and that seems to be occupying me. I hope I can keep the family sticking to it!

Well, hope this room has some chatter soon. Have a great day!

Hi Febbies

How was everyone's weekend?

Saturday I felt connected to and accepted by others, and it was only possible because of sobriety. I was able to get together with a couple of different groups of friends. There was no positioning myself to try to snag an invitation, or pretending to be something I'm not, just people who like each other getting together.

Sunday I had my mother and mother in law over for a very casual dinner last night. We watched UConn win, caught up on dishes and laundry - and waited for next season's youth hockey travel teams to be posted. Once the teams were named, a supportive, fun blitz of jokes and congratulations followed on Facebook. Again, like Saturday, I felt a sense of connectedness.

One of my kids was named to a different baseball team than the one with many of his friends and the folks we know. In the past this would have sent my fear of missing out into a panicked overdrive. What fun are they having without me?! What invitations am I missing out on?!

My weekend showed me that I don't need to be in a million different places for people to think about me, like me, and want me to be a part of their lives.

It's shocking how insecure I am! :)

GEAH and NT, combined you've both hit on what I know I have to tackle next, healthy eating and financial planning.

For now, I enjoy that I slept well again and that I am on vacation from work. Good coffee in hand, thinking of breakfast. Oh, did I mention that I'm enjoying a CLEAN house as well?!? Have a great day all. :-)

Hi Febbies!

Day 8. Sorry I didn't get a chance to post yesterday. Had a really good weekend, even with hubby working most of it, hmm ;) It was cool and rainy out all weekend, but I kept busy and was in a good frame of mind. Yesterday my mom, daughter and I went to church, lunch and then shopping. Sure beats last Sunday when I was sneaking sips of vodka all evening. This time around feels different. I hope it lasts.

Have to get my daughter to preschool and then off to the gym, but will post more later.

Have a great Monday all!

I, too, need to focus on healthy eating and getting our finances in order. I am pretty much in charge of our money and while we are in great shape overall, I feel like we (ok, mostly I) blow a lot of money on stupid unnecessary things (impulse buys - like the Target scarf sitting in my closet with the tags still on it) and I really want to get a better handle on that so we have more money for things that truly matter to us, like taking nice vacations. I have heard great things about a program called You Need a Budget, so I just signed up for their free 30 day demo and online classes to see if maybe this is a tool that will work for us.

For eating, I need to reign in the sugar and the carbs, but for now this is a little lower on my priority list. My main focus right now is mental health (i.e. anxiety), so today I plan on taking the plunge and calling and setting up an appt with a therapist. I think this will really help me in a lot of aspects of my life, but it is so nerve wracking to me and something I have been putting off and putting off. I'm gonna take a deep breath and just do it today though.

GEAH: I ate an incredible amount of sweets this weekend. Even for breakfast, ice cream and cupcakes. This week going healthy too. For me it takes about a week of behaving and the sweet tooth goes way down. Don't forget healthy sweet fruits, and herbal tasty teas.

NT: that is great you fought off the urges and started looking at finances. It appears you've motivated some of us to do the same! I have to taxes.

DI: you have been sounding so much happier lately. It is good to see.

SD: therapist is scary but I've been to a couple. They do help. You can make the call. I find once the first meeting is over it gets way easier.

LB2: Congratulations on making the weekend. Isn't it nice not sneaking shots? Worrying when you can sneak again?

GLEE: I enjoy your posts too. You bring up lots of personal inventory that gets us all thinking. I see you are building a foundation for better self worth. That what I want to do too. It helps keep us sober.

DEE: Glad you are feeling better.

OK Febbies, let's rock this Monday sober!

Made it through the blues this weekend. Staying extra aware that this week will be very dynamic. I start a new job, feeling excited and nervous at the same time. Definitely a positive bit I do have a pattern of drinking when I get over stimulated, even if it's a positive experience. Staying mindful and remembering to breathe.

Have a great Monday everyone!

Isn't it, though. I've been reading this morning and trying to catch-up on everyone's weekend, and my thoughts keep settling on how very much alike all of us are.

Shouldn't we be on part 7?

Several of you have mentioned that I am sounding happier and more positive. I appreciate you noticing. It's a conscious effort on my part. Naturally I am more able to be positive because my head is clearer. Many have been analyzing their lives and why they drink. I of course, have been as well. I have been living in a world of depression because of reasons that are beyond my control. What I can control is whether I choose to dwell on my pain or to focus on the multitudes of positives in my life. Don't get me wrong, I struggle. My AV tells me that I'm walking away from too much, taking too big a risk and then the anxiety pops up. When the anxiety pops up I want to drink it away. You all have taught me tools that I use daily. The scorpion, the weight training, the tape, so many tools. Add on to that the boost I get from just logging on, reading that I have this core of people who are not only supporting me but who absolutely know what I'm going through first hand.

I am more positive and happier. But I still have many moments. I never want to forget what has happened to me and how alcohol made a bad situation nearly unbearable. I want to move on, but I want to remember too. Thanks to you all for the support through this difficulty. My addiction will neither define nor defeat me.

(Part 7, at least. We are a very verbose group!)

Just getting caught up on all posts - was away for most of weekend without wi-fi access. Am struck by the common threads of our lives, common experiences, common triggers - have the feeling that it is no coincidence that we all came together.

Hi February friends... I'm back to work and checking in with all of you on my lunch break. What great posts this morning! I don't have much time but each post has inspired me and reminded me how great it feels to be in the right track and grow each day, rather than drowning our fears and anxieties in alcohol.
I'm actually glad my vacation is over. I don't think I'm quite ready for that much free time. The structure feels good right now.
Have a good Monday, I'll back later as my day winds down.

So good to read this it sounds like you're absolutely nailing it, the strength is shining through! From what you describe I feel exactly the same!

Glad you're well
Stay strong

The thing about fear and anxiety is that it's often so much worse in our heads than it is in reality, when you face it directly you realise it's not that big, and when you face it and overcome it, not only have you stood up to it but you've beaten it back and you think 'Wow that was so small, what else am I running from that I don't need to?" with each victory you get stronger and stronger until these things don't scare you anymore, but you have to face those anxieties and fears the instant they show their ugly heads lest they grow and grow until all your courage has been sapped.

Fears, like limits, are often just an illusion.

Lunchtime. Going for a walk before the snow hits later this week.

One heck of a winter.

Well, I managed to call for a therapy appt. :) Their process apparently is that they take your info, verify your insurance, then call you back to actually make the appt, they said I should expect a call by the end of the week. Wish I could've actually just made the appt and been done with it, but I did start the process so am happy about that.

Checking in all good.

Going to join a gym this week. Dont intend to use it much once a week sometimes twice. Id rather walk along the river than on a tread mill, plus my job is physical. Its so cheap it wont matter. I brought a nice new smartphone for half the money I saved by not drinking last month.

Tired of analysing my past, not sure its effective, surly its more important to treat the problem as it exists now for whatever reason.... not sure.

Find out my job is safe for another 5 yrs so thats good.

Take care all
G