Morning Tobies!
 

Welcome jonny55 and snipe. Nice to have you aboard.

SoberMarathon, if you have a chance, check out my question posed yesterday at 6:55 PM. Id really like to get your (and ctrl's) insights.

Pumpkin Pie, you are in new territory here. It's bound to be a little uncomfortable and cause a bit of emotionality...just let it happen. No sense fighting it. (Fiance seems like a cool dude, btw).

Let's kick the crap out of this weekend Pumpkin!

Great news ItsViolet. Glad you are still with us. Been wondering about ya!

RiverFriend, OK, so you fell off. No time like the present to get back on. Don't let your slip turn into a weekend jag. Pulling for ya bud.

Nice Sarah. Now sending vibes for an even better day today; stick to your plan: stay way from the Vodka.

Zombie. I get the despair. The car situation and the DUI sucks. Try to find the bright spots though. DUI=traffic violation. Given the circumstances, can't get much beteer than that...the stars are already lining up for you!

Damn, DoubleDragons! That's some pretty powerful stuff. Thanks for that food for thought. Hope you have a terrific Friday DD! and GREAT WEEKEND!

Happy Friday all.

14 days in- really? I made it 14 days? Anyone else wake up and go "wow- this is my life- a REAL LIFE!" Still finding myself in that morning haze kind of going "oh ****" what do I need to try and remember from last night"- and clarity hits and its"NOTHING!" I remember every good, bad, whatever aspect of the night before! Cravings are starting to get tough- but I vow to be tougher.

I'm checking in this morning. I slept reasonably well last night, though I woke up probably a half dozen times. I certainly feel better this morning that yesterday thanks to getting rid of the vodka. I'm having some withdrawal symptoms but nothing severe yet. My plan for the day is to increase my physical activity, which has been nil so I'm weak as a kitten. Even walking to the mail box makes my heart pound and my legs collapse. Why do we do this to ourselves?

Well done liberator! You are living up to your handle and freeing yourself. I feel exactly like you do. Real life worth any craving. Stay strong and the cravings really will pass.

Those of you who are worried or wondering about what causes relapse check out this website:

Developing A Relapse Prevention Plan

The thought of food is nauseating but I need to replace the calories I was getting from the booze. I think I'll start with some small bites that I can keep on the coffee table in front of me — grapes, cherry tomatoes. When I get hit with a craving I'll reach for them. Maybe some melon. Other suggestions?

DDs, it's pretty much true. I cannot be a so called functional alcoholic thats why I stop. I know so many people that can go to their jobs and school and drink their butts off. And they are killer at their jobs and school. But, they must be miserable anyway. And like you said, killing themselves. My sister eats a super healthy/clean diet and one beer or wine will make her hung over the entire next day. Says something.

Hey all, I had my last drink on Sunday 6th October so today is Day 5.

I'm doing well so far but trying not to become complacent and doing alot of reading here, eating right and trying to up my exercise levels.

I felt a little anxious yesterday so it was helpful to be here and understand that these feelings are normal in early recovery.

It's a tough road so I genuinely wish everyone (and myself!) the best x

Today
 

So...

...today is day 12 for me no beer/alcohol. Last summer I went 11 days days when watching my nephew. But I had no plan to quit and went right back to beer as soon as I got to his parents house.

Anyway, I have not been 12 days sober in 20 years.

Day 54 no smokes.

Day 14 flossing every morning (hee-hee!).

Let's all put a big whooping stick on this weekend!

:supernan

Hey Driver1 What an outstanding accomplishment! You are kicking all your addictions this year, and flossing to boot. I have never even made it past the 3 day "bleeding gum" stage in flossing--is that dental withdrawal?
I'm seriously impressed with all of the above and not only that, you've been a real support to everyone here. Have a lovely sober weekend :c011:

This is what Gorski has to say about relapse:

"People who relapse aren't suddenly taken drunk. Most experience progressive warning signs that reactivate denial and cause so much pain that self-medication with alcohol or drugs seems like a good idea. This is not a conscious process. These warning signs develop automatically and unconsciously. Since most recovering people have never been taught how to identify and manage relapse warning signs, they don't notice them until the pain becomes too severe to ignore."

Following my intention to be more "active" today, I am managing to get some stuff done around the house. I have almost no stamina so I am setting the timer for 5 minutes up, 20 minutes down. So far I've loaded the dishwasher (it's been a while) and sorted through some laundry (also been a while).

Today I am feeling at least 50% better physically and mentally. Vodka is a killer.

Hi everyone! It's been a busy couple of days. Like George, I go in spurts re: posting. Sometimes when I am feeling really great I get a lot done...but as a result I don't have a lot of time for posting. Sorry for that...you all provide so much inspiration and advice.

Today is day 20.

So Driver....your post about relapses. I have had tons of sober periods, mostly because I would be best classified as a binge drinker, and after each binge I'd "take it easy". There have been periods where I would drink quite a bit daily, but for some reason I could put on the brakes with a ton of effort. Needless to say, this time around I am not just taking a break.

A relapse is a very real danger for me, because I tell myself that I can have one or two and be fine, as long as I don't allow myself to let loose, or vaguely "drink responsibly". That is how it starts. I say I'll never get drunk again. I'll say I'll only have one or two. I count drinks by the hour. I eat more.

At some point, if alcohol is in any way allowed, I will let loose, and the result are disastrous. Also, if I'm being completely honest with myself, even if I have 1 beer it takes a lot of effort to stop, and becomes all I focus on. I miss out on a lot of life.

My method this time around? Focus on the fact that all I want is to be happy. That equation, for me, is to focus on those things that bring value to my life...family, meaningful work, creativity, exercise, to grow and contribute. There are endless paths that I can walk to grow and contribute in these areas...not one involves alcohol.

So can I handle moderation? Will having that one glass of wine ruin my life? I don't know. What I DO know is that is doesn't contribute to making me more happy...so the answer doesn't matter, I drop it, and I move on. In fact, if I need a reminder on how things CAN go, I think about Day 1.

I agree that a relapse happens way before that first drink. It happens when you think that alcohol provides value. It happens when you place alcohol on a higher pedestal than the other worthy things in your life.

Everyday I revisit the fact that I have alcohol locked in a cell in my mind's dungeon. The good in my life is upstairs, and it's where I find happiness. While some of my demons can escape from their cells and create problems that I have to deal with, alcohol can't escape on its own. Only I can let it out. Only I hold the key to its cell.

Everyday I remind myself that alcohol will never be a problem for me if I don't open that door. Alcohol doesn't belong upstairs, but it will run up the stairs and stain everything that is good. Everything good will be tied to alcohol. Celebrations, grieving, relaxing. I don't want that.

Mornin' Tobies,

Man, it's been a busy few days -- keeping me away from the computer. But it's also kept me away from the booze. So cool to be at Day 17! Who'd have thought????

But each day gets a little easier, and the cumulative effect of reinforcement from the prior days, as well as the SR encouragement means that Day 18 is just a few hours away!

Happy Friday, everyone!

Fishy

Hi guys! Day 5 here. Sponsor coming over in a few to work on step 1. Also, got news yesterday that i was approved for counseling at a discounted rate at a center I applied to. Start next week :) Otherwise, I've been keeping really busy going to meetings and working on my career stuff. Tonight I'm gonna go to a mens' meeting w/my sponsor at someone's house and have speghetti. So I should get through tonight ( a trigger night) sober. Getting a plan together for tomorrow night (another trigger night). So that's the latest with me. I'll check back maybe tonight. Have a good one everyone!

You're doing exactly the right thing. You might think about tomorrow morning too. Waking up with no where to go on Saturday morning has taken many a good person out.

You've got a sponsor! That's great.

:ring

Day 40 here and still holding strong. I had a job interview today that went well but we will see.

I found out that my wife wants to host a Halloween part (with costumes) in two weeks. I'm not worried about drinking as it will be her co-workers who I don't know that well. There will be beer and wine (which I am not going to buy) but no hard liquor. Being around people who are drinking, and abstaining myself, has never been a big problem. I'll probably end up eating for two people to keep my stomach full.

Based on my experience, if I were you I would be very worried. These kind of events are real triggers. It might not happen that night, but in a day or so. You may feel resentful, you may feel that you've been very successful and it would be "OK" to have a drink. Stay close, have a plan, be watchful of your moods. 45 days is a big time window for PAWS.

Day 1: Its never too late to start the journey to stop drinking. Here I go again.

I'm right there with you. Vodka free and determined to quit beer too. You're on the road.