:rotfxko too funny!

I don't know if you're meaning to be so funny jeni and I apologize if you truly are suffering but you are cracking me up! Cars have been invented, haha. Give it some time to possibly work on the insomnia. I'm so proud of you for doing these things outside of your comfort zone.

Yes OLL was thinking just the same thing. Holy sh*t Jeni is doing two big things this week - working out and going to therapy!!! YOU GO GIRL!!! What amazing things you are doing!! Our little Jeni is getting so growed up, so strong!!!:baby::Squat:

Oh and where is the therapy session smiley? Should have one with a couch with a box of tissues next to it and a smiley with a clipboard..so cliche!:)

Speaking of which I am going to be ending my therapy for now, I have been seeing a counselor through my relationship problems all the way through divorce, and through now more than 1.5 years after divorce was finalized...off and on of course, lately I've only been seeing her every 6-8 weeks. I feel I've plateaued for the moment and need to just live life using the tools I've gained....I am going to have one more session next week and then it's off....of course an appt with her is just a phone call away if needed. WOW!!
Thanks for the kind words about the HH next week. Can I tell you how good it feels to know you May-bees are behind me supporting me AND know exactly what it feels like and give lovely suggestions for ways I could handle it!!
:Valdog::ValA006::ValB011::Vhearts0102::VA016:

XOXOX

Hey Kitty, yes, I too understand about stopping or taking a break from therapy. I think we periodically need time to integrate all those amazing insights :-) Wowee! A couch? a Smiley with a clipboard? The box of tissues is, of course always necessary but the others???? I once had a boss who was a p-doc and he had a sofa but I wouldn't have wanted to lie down on it!!! Yuck. It was old and ratty and sagged!

And Kitty, I know you will be fine, whatever decision you make about that HH next week. You have become so strong that I think it's time to put a grown up pic of Crispin as your avatar :-)

sas

Yeah I was being lighthearted OLL xxxx.

But it's now 2 a.m and this insomnia is not funny.... I think this is the one thing that makes me so desperate I would take anything to sleep. Luckily I don't have anything really I suppose. Self medicating would definitely be appealing to me right now.

(((Teacher Jeni))). I'm sorry you're up and struggling with insomnia. You are one strong chick, girlfriend. No self-med needed. Sending you big hugs. I hope you're able to get some rest tonight. Catch up with you tomorrow. :)

Hope everyone's doing ok :)

Busy days.

I feel my role here is changing, at least for now - more mod stuff, less posting...still rewarding, just... different :)

glad to see the support here :)

D

Best wishes to you in your role change, Dee. We love you here! Hugs to you. :)

Hope your role change works out well for you Dee. You are a great support to us all. Lots of love to you xxx

I'll still be around :)

D

Thank goodness :supernan
You have helped us so much

:lmao

didn't mean to post a goodbye note...just trying to keep you guys in the loop :)

D

How are your muscles this morning Jeni? Did you get some sleep?

My legs, stomach and neck muscles ache and I've got a pain in my elbow!!!

I slept for about 3 hours. This insomnia is the pits, it really is. I'm at a loss as to what to do about it. I've got such a busy day but I'm getting forgetful and I 'zone out' when people talk to me, which I can't afford to do because I might miss something important. Therapy is my last hope really. Big sighs.

How are you doing HRB?x

Sorry to hear about another night of insomnia. I hope therapy will help, but if you still have trouble there are other options like a sleep study.

The pain is good for you...lets you know your alive and you overdid it:)

I am doing pretty good. I had a major day of the lazies after my night from hell last night. I didnt even get out to jog. I did get a bunch of orchids a friend gave me tied up on the palms, so I'm glad about that.

I hope we have a nice day when I wake up so I can get out on my kayak.

Have a good day and stay safe.

Good morning, Mayans!

Jeni, so sorry to hear you are still plagued by insomnia! Rock's mention of a sleep study reminds me - my therapist sent me for a sleep study about 20 years ago and it showed that I kept dipping into a very shallow sleep and then jerking awake again. I didn't think I slept at all but they measured that I got 3.5 hours of poor quality sleep. They felt that the pattern of starting to fall asleep and then jerking out of it was typical of unresolved trauma -- essentially I was terrified of going to sleep. The p-doc gave me sleeping pills to use temporarily until we worked through the underlying issues. It was totally awesome how that helped and made every minute of therapy worthwhile! I still occasionally have a bit of insomnia but I don't panic anymore and it doesn't become a vicious circle. You will get through this and I totally believe you will be so glad you did. Trauma survivors usually feel enormous panic at the thought of dealing with it but it can be a very healing process and isn't terrifying as we think it will be. Keep taking long, slow deep breaths and tell youself that this, too, shall pass. Try to think beyond the terror and imagine how you will feel after with all of that weight lifted from your shoulders.

Rock, I'm happy to hear you had a lazy day! The kind of work schedule you have is, IMHO, difficult to say the least. And I know that the kind of work you do can be intense and exhausting. I hope you have a beautiful day to go out in your kayak. It's so great for our minds to be out on the water and in a kayak I always felt like I was "in" the water or even part of it. So soothing.

I hope everyone has a good day!

S

Thanks Sassy. Your words mean a lot to me xxx

Em-how are you doing? We need to hear from you xxx