congratulations Eli :)

D

Wow , lots of great posts and sobriety!

Well done SBTS , Eli , JimUK , Well91 , Ozark and my gosh IWW , that's a lot of a plate in early days , well done and well done all and anyone I missed ...

Day 128 rolled in today and have felt out of sorts the last few days and down but it all feels a lot better than early September did. Even when I feel down and/or sad I know it will pass and I don't feel physically like a bag of crap. I truly don't miss that hell....but would like a few days of feeling more energetic and more prone to smile or laugh than frown would be nice. They will come in time.

This is the longest sobriety I have had since the age of 17 and well ....that's a year or two ago :c031: Seems like I never knew any answer other than to drink when things came up ...good things...bad things...other peoples things...err anything. I still don't know a lot but being okay with that has helped and the feeling I was alone in not knowing what do has gone away.

My visit with my kids is but a week away and I am surprised I feel kind of ambivalent about some part of it. Its just the feeling I have and it just is , neither good or bad. I suppose I had thought all this excitement would swell over me but that has not happened and that actually may be a good thing. No trough of deep sadness and fear nor any mania of some rainbow dream of all being fixed. I just sense a calmness and I do want to see my kids and be there for them in total presence in the moment. I know the visit will be good with tough parts mixed in and it will be difficult to leave but the story will continue and the end of a trip is not the end of a story.

I will find my way to a meeting or two and kind of like seeing how different meetings work in other places. I guess for myself , I get a centered feeling at and after a meeting whether I shared or not. Maybe the reminder of what is was like helps me reflect that today's troubles are a lot less formidable than they were and when finding a bottle was the only next best thing to do.

So wish every a great 24 and thanks for the inspiration your posts give me. I am grateful for you insights and sharing of your path to sobriety which ever way you choose.

Good morning all,

Hang tough YVR, thanks for sharing and your post.

Morning all, well done Eli big hugs to you. YVRguy you're an inspiration, I hope you find you smile again soon. Have a happy Friday everyone it's going to be another podium this Monday for me, working over the weekend so I won't have time or be thinking of drinking.

Hi September friends. Eli, that is AWESOME!!!!!!

YVR, hang in there. I think it is good that you're feeling level right now... I guess you would expect a degree of manic, but you still have a week to wait so it looks like you are in a good place.

Jim, I look forward to the podium too. It is such a great short term goal...especially for those of us who slipped and have fewer consecutive days right now.

Happy Friday everyone!

One of the better quotes I've heard that has heped me in the past....

"The elevator to success is out of order. You'll have to use the stairs...one step
at a time".

Joe Girard

We can do this folks !!!! Keep at it.

Great quote, Ozarkcowboy.

Good morning from Scotland everybody. :ring

Last night I was sober and today I wont drink either.

We can do it, the longer you stay sober, the easier it becomes. :tyou

Thanks guys. Hope you all have a good weekend. See you on the podium on Monday.

Hi Everyone,

Great quote Ozark! Have a great sober Saturday!!!

We are having company for dinner tonight and I am not going to serve wine. I normally do, and just tell myself not to have any, but these are dear friends and they won't mind. I can offer them beer - not my drink of choice and not at all a temptation for me - and that will be fine.

This is good...

Hi All

I like that quote Ozark and one step and one day at a time sure applies to me. I tried to skip over a lot of stuff.....and it did not work out well for some of those things.

Nice to wake up sober Saturday from a sober Friday and I am grateful for that. Saturday has two great local meetings I like so I look forward to those each Saturday I can make them.

Seems yesterday and so far today my mood is a bit lighter. We have had some sunshine here which is nice. This time of year can be predominantly cloud/rain/repeat for weeks so the change is nice. I see the constant change going on with me as well with some days being less cloudy than others so staying patient will see more sun and less cloud within me for sure. I guess I am just a bit impatient ....go figure an impatient alcoholic *grin* And darn can't I do something to make it speed up....*grin* ..oh yes my best thinking and some of the doing got me here *grin*

It was funny yesterday that the topic of humility came up and for a long time I thought low self esteem, harsh self criticism and humiliation is what humility was. Well I guess I thought it was funny, or perhaps odd is a better word, as it was a reflection of how my thinking was pretty out of sorts. When I think about humility now I don't have the confusion of being self indulgent in negativity and perfectionism but more just trying to be the best I can with a level head about where I am at and how its progress from where I was . The confusion probably stemmed from my constant obsession of doing, doing all the time, rather than taking any time of just being and being aware. I sure did a lot of stuff , some good and some not so good and I did it all without much contemplation. I am not to worried about how I was other than to try to notice when I am heading back that way and the perils that await there if I continue on a sideways path. I do see how this damaged myself and others but I now have the chance to stop repeating things like this that served no useful purpose and simply created a lot of trouble.

So just stopping drinking does appear to be the start of recovery. I sure like the options ahead sober than the one way path of drinking. If I see it properly I should see no matter how bleak things seem today , how dark and dreary , its a large step above simply existing to find a bottle which is where I had been a long time.

Wishing everyone a sober and great 24

Benice, good luck with your dinner party tonight, stay strong. Do your friends know your trying not to drink?

Ok I failed crashed and burned. I relapsed after almost 8 weeks. WTH? Ive been struggling a lot lately maybe I didn't share enough. Not working, not driving, court coming up, moms divorce ect got the best of me. Pissed but it is what it is....

just an fyi moms divorce, has been a strain bc I have been living with her and her soon to be ex husband.

sorry to hear that hope22.
What have you been using for support?

D

Sorry to hear that Hope. I know you're dealing with a lot of stuff. Get straight back on the wagon. You can do this!

YVR - I like what you had to say about humility. I've never really been able to define it for myself and like you, would have the word associated with negativity.

I'm here! Sober and safe...could not get SR during my trip (Thursday-Friday). I tried EVERYTHING and had wi-fi. All other sites were working but the forums. I was so bummed. Finally had some time to catch up and couldn't get in! I even tried from the business center.

Oh well, I'm here now and so is SR so all good in the hood. Business trip number 2 totally sober and I'm proud. Dad still grave but I can only do what I can do. And the best thing to is not drink over it. So I'm not. Take that Mr. AV!!!

I'm extremely jet-lagged from my quick turnaround but just wanted to let you all know that I had a good trip and no booze. Actually watched Flight the movie last night and that was as good as a meeting or posting here. Great flick about this insidious beast. If you haven't seen it yet I highly suggest it.

Off to try and trick my body clock into normal for the upcoming week of work and dealing with Dad's declining state. Wishing all a sober weekend and hope to see you on the podium Monday!

Sorry about your slip hope :( and your dad IWW...sounds like you are coping well.

Doing fine here still. Went out with some friends for dinner tonight, another couple we know. They have a baby and the mom is breast feeding, so she wasn't drinking either. After dinner the guys had one beer and we ladies had sodas, then we headed home at 9pm. I never thought that I would get to the point where I would be totally okay with my social life being so low key, but I really am.

Thank you for asking Hope. They brought wine and each had some with dinner and I threw away what was left when they left. I drank club soda mixed with raspberry lemonade in a pretty glass. We had coffee and chocolate after dinner so I did Just fine.

I'm so sorry to hear about your slip and you situation at home. I don't know why we do that to ourselves, but I hope you get right back to it. I found it hard to focus on total abstinence after a slip. My AV got pretty strong and cunning. I hope you stay strong and
Put your AV back in its place! Hugs...

IWW, great job on your trip!

SBTS sounds like a nice evening! Ours ended earlier than I expected too and I was really good with that. I felt very content. Yea, I get it!

love you guys, but let me remind you what its like. I drank, Im sitting here contemplating if I should get more.