Crewisms, why don't you pick up a movie or something nice to cook for yourself on the way home? It's really important to have a plan for evenings home alone during these early days, at least in my experience. Stick with it. :)

You can do it crewisms! The tough evenings only show us how strong we are.

You guys should see my incredible stash of yummy non-alcoholic beverages. I've got about 8 different kinds of tea, vitamin water, etc. I'm sampling a few different drinks for when I want something refreshing and cold. I had to move my husband's beer to make room, so I shoved it to the back of the fridge behind a bunch of other stuff. He'll have to excavate to get to it.

Thank y'all for the kind words. Just took a walk to breath in the fresh air and breath out that ugly alcoholic voice. I work on a hilltop in a valley with views of Mt. Hood, St. Helens and other beauties. I came back to my office to find the office cat basking in the sun next to my window. Tonight I'm gonna watch my 7-year old son play his baseball game, then go home and chef a fine dinner. I think I'll open up a fine bottle of ginger-ale to celebrate the end of Day Five. Thanks Deserto, Luling and Dee.

Hey all, Day 13 for me. It's been a bit of a strange day, but drinking hasn't really crossed my mind so that's good. I woke up feeling great with tons of energy, and at noon time went to an awesome AA meeting. It was a "speaker" meeting, and it really hit home with me and gave me a lot of hope and inspiration.

After the meeting I was feeling on top of the world, and then as the day progressed I was finding out and dealing with all the people close to me having rough days. I tried my best to be there for them, and had definite feelings of selfishness when I had thoughts like "why does this have to happen to me today" and the like. Needless to say, it was a pretty draining afternoon, but I'm feeling better now. I guess it was a necessary reminder that just because I'm sober doesn't mean I don't have to deal with the rest of life. It reminded me of a quote that goes something like: "If all a drunken horse thief does is get sober he's still just a horse thief."

The bright side is that I feel I was able to be there for the people the best I could, and didn't feel I needed to drink to deal with it. All in all I think it was a day of valuable lesson learning. Much love to all of you and stay strong and sober!

Dang it, Deserto. Scrunching into the front seat with Payton, are ya? And "bugling elephant?" Huh. None of Chuck's leftover famous potato salad for you.

Sheesh. Foiled again. Dadgum desert sidewinders...

:)

That's wonderful, Payton! Ditto on what Deserto, Crew, and Uninvited said. Isn't it nice to actually see a benefit to quitting drinking in addition to feeling better? Face isn't red and swollen, eyes are clear and not bloodshot, no dark circles, skin texture is better, heck - even my eyelashes are starting to get thicker again. I'm so glad your pictures are a lovely reminder and inspiration for you. Way to go, Payton! :)

Hey, Lilac. Sorry to hear about your relapse. We've all been there and understand. You know how we do it here, get back in the wagon where we're saving a seat for you!

Luling, you sound great! I'm for AA because it's working/worked for so many, but the 12-stepper deal isn't for me, either. Reading more about quitting and staying quit is a good idea, and doing this as a group - as Harpo intimated - keeps the one-person-island loneliness at bay.

Go, Lee, Jeni, and Crew, go! Great job and congrats on your continued sobriety. :)

Welcome, goldie5, schwarz73, and OneLessLonely. Lots of great people here for terrific support. :)

Hey, Seahorse. Thank you for picking up the torch. Your rhyme sounds great...and makes sense, unlike some of my silly ramblings. :) I posted my daily rhyme earlier this morning. Probably still stuck back there in Part 2. Here it is again:
Acting as a teen.
Shake a tambourine.
Dancin' and groovin'
on Day 17.

So far so good on this evening for me. Quiet streets and easy commute this morning. Most of the vacationers left earlier today. Only blip on the personal screen is this ongoing family feud. Thought we'd nipped it in the bud, but looks like the engine is revving up higher. Crap. At what age am I too old to run away from home? :)

Your poetry is improving. ;) LOL

Hope everyone is great. My internet is back and running and was driving me CRAZY. You guys are an integral part to my sobriety. I never realized how much posting on here means to me until this weekend when my internet was spotty. Didn't want to drink or anything but was missing my SR peeps! :)

Tomorrow is day 27 and I am kind of in shock. It has been a long time but at the same time I am so proud and amazed. Have not gone this long since my fall in March after 29 or so days, but I think I was white-knuckling around then--just "not drinking" instead of true recovery...I'm proud of those days in March and April but I see my recovery as so much more comprehensive now.

How are ya, FDM?

Hope everyone is great. Welcome to all the new peeps out there and I am SOOO proud of you Payton! You are really grinding it out and your tone is so very positive!

I do say we have rocked May!!
Have a great night, everyone!
Lee

Good evening, May folk! I really love this group and am so grateful for the support and lack of judgment I received regarding my brief fall off the wagon.

Went to the counselor today and am really glad. She was terrific. She was able to identify that alcohol is a form of self-medicating for me and told me that I'm dealing with quite a lot and I am a survivor. It felt so good to be validated. Alcohol was peripheral to the stuff she identified to help me work on. She also gave me a book to read on Buddhism, "A Path With Heart" by Jack Kornfield. I almost bought it on Amazon a few days ago, so when she suggested I read it I was floored. I'm thinking that a regular meditation practice should be added to my toolbox of sobriety and personal growth tools, so I am interested in hearing more from those of you using meditation. I also learned that one of the women who works at the tribe's social services department (in addition to being a prosecutor I also represent social services in dependency and neglect cases) is a Native American healer. She suggested some crystals for me and was able to pinpoint that I am carrying some old baggage that I need to let go. She could get that just from me being in her office. I'm thinking I'll make an appointment to let her do some intense healing work with me. I really feel like a weight is being lifted just from today's experiences. And as the weight goes, so does the thought of or desire to drink.

Welcome to our new folks! You will really love the support in this group. And congrats to everyone on another day sober.

Thanks again, everyone. Your support means a lot and I feel loved here! :)

Payton - I think yoga does much of the same thing from the time I practiced it (which reminds me that is another thing I want to restart but I'm trying to pace myself). I attended a mindfulness meditation workshop last fall. A lot of it is learning to accept whatever is going on in our minds. One exercise I'm doing now is the 3-minute body scan. I just sit up straight and breathe, focusing first on the breath and then gradually expanding my awareness to my body and reminding myself to be accepting of whatever comes up. It's a very short yet very refreshing break.

The CD I use is attached to the book "The Mindful Way through Depression: Freeing Yourself from Chronic Unhappiness" by Mark Williams, John Teasdale, Zindel Segal, and Jon Kabat-Zinn. The last author is also the narrator on the CD and he is, imho, terrific -- perfect voice for this! The book is also very helpful.

During the 10 weeks of the workshop, I didn't drink at all for the last 2 weeks. Unfortunately I didn't keep up my practice so now I'm going back to that.

I'm heading for bed so will say "good night" and good thoughts for all.

Saskia
2 days sober
--------------------------------------------------------------------
"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning how to dance in the rain."
--- Author unknown

Day 1 for me. I really like what I've read so far. Thanks for the welcome.

Glad you're here! This is only my second day.

Saskia, thanks for sharing about your meditation experience. I agree that yoga gets the same effect. I was doing lots of drugs and booze about 6-7 years ago when I signed up for a 30 day yoga challenge. I felt so centered after just the first class that I didn't have any desire for drugs or alcohol. A couple years ago I did a kundalini yoga DVD every other day or so and it helped to stop the desire for alcohol, too.

I have lots of yoga DVDs, it's just a matter of making a point to use them! I've read a book by Jon Kabat-Zinn called "Wherever You Go, There You Are." It was over a decade ago that I read it. I think that will be in my book lineup to support my sobriety and personal growth and health. Thanks for the CD recommendation.

Schwarz, this group is terrific! I am glad you've joined us here!

I'll be thinking of you tonight crewisms. I raise my glass of emergen-C to your ginger- ale in celebration of day five for you!!

lilac, how brave of you to stay here in SR, call a counselor…nice work.

Payton, day 15 wow! I admire how you take on your issues with such determination and openness, you are an inspiration.

Congrats Luling on Day 9. I also will not be doing AA. I am still in the early phase figuring out what will work longterm for me, I started doing yoga six years ago, I believe it saved my life, and now I have SR to add to my sober living tool belt.

Thank you everyone for the other night. I'm still hanging in there and not drinking. The woman who I'm moving in with told me that I'm welcome to start moving in anytime within the next month. So I'm going to start as soon as possible.

I went to a new doctor today to get my ritalin prescription that I've had since I was 6 years old. It was odd because I was downright honest with her that I had problems with drinking so she gave me a blood test to check my liver and adrenal function. I also had to do a p*** test and a breathalyzer because she won't prescribe controlled stimulants to anyone who has substance problems. Same goes for my other psychiatric prescriptions she won't treat me if anything ever comes back positive.

I have never ever run into that before or even heard of it. I guess it makes sense though you don't want to prescribe a potentially abuse-able substance to someone who is using anything. It's actually a really good motivation to stay clean though because I do need my prescriptions, not just the ritalin but the other medications I take on a daily basis.

Hey Crewisms Congrats on day 5!

Nice to have a fellow Oregonian on here, as well as its nice to have a clear day again to see the mountains from here in Portland (for the rest of you we've had a run of dark rainy days over the last 2-weeks)

Isn't it great to be enjoying your kids and the rest of our world with a clear head?

Keep up the good work!

GingerBeer

pink62 -- Yoga is amazing; I'd go every day if I had time. There's a hot yoga studio near my house, and I end up feeling like an overcooked noodle at the end of it, just so limp and relaxed. At takes all of the tension right out of me, leaving no room for cravings. This forum is a sanity-saver too. It's important to not have to do this alone.

Flick! I was worried about you! Glad to see you back and that is great news about moving in with the new roommate early! Keep posting on your progress and success!

By the way, I too was diagnosed with ADD at age 38. That was 8 yrs ago, one of the OTHER times that I tried to moderate my drinking). The Dr. tried 6 or 8 different brands and strengths and I couldn't handle the way the meds made me feel (all speedy) so I never have found a prescription to help me ongoing. It's too bad because it really impacts my life and I struggle to apply systems and behaviors to be functional despite being a very classic ADD (struggles with hyper-focus, time management and organization etc.) I'm glad for you that you have an Rx that works for you.

Flicked, good for you for being honest with your doctor. That took some courage; I've always lied to my doctor. Do be careful with the Ritalin; I've taken Adderall for my ADHD and in my case I found that as the medication wore off, I really craved a drink to calm the jitters. I've decided to stop taking it for that reason. But of course maybe that's just me.