Where do I start
 

I've logged on and off so many times wanting to write this and I always think I'm being stupid and no one will understand but I've been a heavy smoker for 22 years since I was 17 I have smoked heavily every day....it started when I was in an abusive relationship every morning he would roll one and life was so ****** my young brain knew no better...I've fought alcohol addiction but I just don't where to start with giving up weed....every day I say I will cut down but within 10 minutes of me waking up I'm crying and can't cope I smoke one and can get on with my day...I know I have to go through uncomfortable feelings withdraws etc but I'm just so scared I know it's time my soul has had enough...my whole life is getting weed worrying about running out juggling finances and I actually will go without a meal and walk to work...it's become my top priority financially I have had enough. The amount of money I spend on it is disgusting and makes me feel so ashamed i...I'm 40 now and I just realised that half my life has just been stoned I'm waffling on now but if anyone has any tips on just where to start I would be grateful... I can't believe how daunting this feels and why can't I use the same tools I used to get rid of alcohol this just feels so normal to me like having a cup of tea I just don't know how to even get to 12 hours xxx

Hi and welcome Louise

Support made a big difference for me - I hope it will for you too.

Getting all your weed and assorted paraphenalia out of the house and thrown away is a good start I think.

It won't be pleasant and you may think about rooting through your bin a few times but its a start.

There's also some links at the top of the forum.
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ful-links.html

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...hout-weed.html

Not sure on where you stand with meeting based things like Marijuana Anonymous or SMART Recovery but if its in your town, that could be another line of defence.


I smoked for 30 years and quit - if I can do it anyone can - you're gonna be ok Louise :)

D

Hi Louise, welcome.

I feel you, I've been where you are now. I suffered a lot. I'm sorry you are suffering now, I know it's very tough. There is a way out, for sure.

For me, the greatest first step was giving up the idea of trying to cut down my smoking, trying to moderate, trying to smoke once in a while, or once a week, or once a month, or only on weekends, or only by the end of the day.... I tried it all and it never worked, I tried and suffered for years. When I finally gave up that idea then things started to get better.

Listening to Dee always helped a lot, I'm very grateful, so make sure you listen to what he says. This forum in general helped to understand a lot of things (it took me years though). Hope you can learn faster than I did and snap out of it.

Withdrawal is rough but it sure goes away. We are here to help you go through it, you are not alone. I'm 2 years sober and I feel good, I don't want to smoke ever again. If I can do it, you can do it too.

This happened to me as well. The more I smoked, the greater the feeling of dread and fear when I woke up the next day. I remember having a profound feeling of deep loss. Everything felt completely unmanageable to me. I remember sitting in the parking lot at work, feeling like I would never make it through the day. I cried often for no reason.

When I quit, it took less than a week for those feelings to go away. I've had some really bad times since then, but I don't think I've ever reached that level again. It always made me feel good to know that feeling that way was a choice, and that I never had to go back to that again if I didn't want to.

Thank you so very much for your replies that have been more than helpful and made me feel like I'm not crazy and I can do this...today is day 1 of not smoking I would have had one by now but I'm just keeping an open mind for the day and just ride with it instead of panicking and fighting the cravings..it's quite nice though as usually my av would be going mad by now but I've replaced her with a voice that keeps telling me I can do this and life doesn't have to be this hard anymore....I know I've got a lot of work today but feeling in control and positive on my day 1 xxx

Congrats on day one Louise :c014:

D

Thank you Dee xxx

Congrats on day 1! Nice mindset. Yes, you can do it, for sure :)

Thanks for your post.

I quit booze a while back and am thinking about trying pot.

My current job might be going away and with it the restriction of no mj.

From what you are dealing with I can see mj would put me in a similar dependent mental state as booze did.

I don't need a new addiction.

As always, sr saved me.

Thanks.