prayers to you and your son, wascally. it's a hard day, i understand. blessings, k

((((Wascally)))
I am so sorry. Please know that what you are experiencing is many of us parents' worse nightmare, but in the end, as you've shown, we can get through it.
I admire your strength.
And please find comfort in that what you did was probably the most difficult, but most loving thing you could do for your son.
Prayers are with you and your family.
((((hugs))))
Cece

IM SO SORRY ABOUT YOUR AS. MINES IN JAIL NOW TOO. I KNOW THE EMABARASSMENT YOU FEEL ALSO. YOU FEEL AS EVRYONE THINKS YOUR THE HORRIBLE ONE. YOU FEEL AS THOUGH YOU FAILED THEM SOMEHOW. AS HAS BEEN SAID HERE IN THIS ROOM MANY TIMES , I JUST KEEP THINKING 3C'S 3C'S 3C'S. I THINK ITS THE ONLY THING THAT GETS ME THROUGH. IM AFRAID MINE IS JUST STARTING YOUR AS'S CYCLE. HE CALLED AND COULDNT BELIEVE I WOULDNT BAIL HIM OUT. I SAID JUSTIN, YOU BROKE INTO MY HOUSE, YOU SMOKE CRACK WITH A 15YR OLD AGF. WHY WOULD I BAIL YOU OUT. HE SAID ILL PAY YOU BACK. I SAID JUSTIN YOU DONT HAVE A JOB????. HIS COURT DATE IS MONDAY SO IM SURE IT WILL BE PROBATION AND THE START OF MANY COURT DATES TO COME. SOMETHING ELSE SOMEONE IN HERE TOLD ME THAT SEEMED TO COMFORT ME A LITTLE IS HES GETTING 3 HOTS AND A COT. MAYBE THAT BEATS THE STREET???? ILL SAY A PRAYER FOR YOU AND ALL YOUR KIDS.

these stories are just heartbreaking. again, i am so sorry wascally and laketime.

blessings and extra prayers, k

"They are all in jail. It's a terrible legacy to leave behind, isn't it?"

Don't think that for a minute. Your legacy is wonderful. Anyone can be a good mom when the kids are in college and the mortgage is paid and the world is shiny.
What you did is so much harder, and so much more loving. You walked through all that darkness with him, and when it was time, you knew how to let him go. It takes my breath away.
((((((hugs & prayers)))))

There was a time the thought of jail horrrified me. Now, I'm grateful AS is in a regulated environment with buddies, fed, clothed and safe.
Moose's sons were both in jail not long ago and they've found recovery. There is hope WW.
I honestly believe our addicts know they can try and get themselves together and even get a rest in jail.
Certainly it's not any Mom's dream for a child. Remember son's actions got him where he is...not you or anything about you.
Hugs

I am stunned and extremely thankful for all the responses.
This is what gets me through the day.

The codependant in me wants to run down to the jail, give him money, and spend my retirement money on a lawyer.

The alanon in me says I would only be intruding on his recovery. I would be in the way, an obstacle, a roadblock. And, with that, he might never come to the realization that he is powerless over drugs and his life has become unmanagable.

My HP will help me every step of the way. He already has already given me this website, and a meeting to go to.

I think it's time I wrote a gratitude list, and started filling up the God Box!

I love you all, each and every one. Thank you so much for being here for me.
Wascally!

Wabbit,
Don't let it get you down.
Personally, I think prison was the best thing that ever happened to both my sons. At least for today, they are both sober, and moving in the right direction.

Legacy, smegacy...that's what I say. It has NO reflection on the way we raised them, or guided them. After all, WE`are not, nor were we ever in control.

Sometimes, I seem to forget that, and blame myself, but that's hogwash.

Hugs to you Wabbit, enjoy the peace, quiet and serenity....

As the mother of an addict I feel your pain. We can only learn to detach. Our child has his life to live and we can't live the life we have if we are trying to live the life that we had planned. Letting go is something to do because the pain will be less than the alternative. Thanks for sharing it helps all of us let that pain out. No mom wants to admit their son is an addict or in jail, but reality must be faced. Stay strong and think about what brings you joy and then go in that direction.