Conversation occurs after I have spent the entire day taking care of our 1 and 2 year olds and AH's 6 year old nephew, and AH has been at work (taking swigs off his vodka bottle throughout the day). I'm giving the kids a bath, but have to go upstairs to grab soap and washcloth
Me: "Can you sit with the kids for a sec while I run upstairs?" He does, but when I come back into the bathroom, he says:
"You know, no other guy would do this much for you after working all day. I have had to deal with people asking you to do sh** all day and then I come home and it's more of the same. You guys are all driving me insane. And you wonder why I need a drink to calm down."
Ummm... I've been dealing with three kids all day long!!!!!!!!

Um wow, that is absurd... Really? You asked him to... sit... That is the very LEAST he could do!

We've been together for 13 years. He is currently unemployed, but being a stay at home dad. This is the conversation that we have pretty much every time he falls off the wagon:

AH: I mess up once and you act like it's such a big deal (I know full well that it's not going to be just once since I've been down this road before)

Me:.....

AH: I think people forget that I've taken care of you for 7 years.

(meanwhile, I've been working to pay the mortgage, his credit card- although thankfully, he has no other debts, my credit cards, school loans, food, clothing etc). For the 7 years that he "took care" of me, I paid my own credit card bills, my half of the mortgage/rent, utilities, loans, etc. He paid for groceries, his half of the mortgage, day care and his bills. It frustrates me to no end that he doesn't see the difference.

This is my new favorite thread. It's sad that it's funny, but I've had similar conversations so many times that it's humorous. I wonder if my alcoholic, "I pride myself in being unique and rebellious" husband realizes just how cliche he is.

Sometimes you have to laugh, right? It's either that or cry and I'd rather laugh.

I just thought of another one - after his latest relaspe

me: It's sad to think that you went 6 weeks sober and now you are back to day 1.

AH: No, it doesn't.

me: um....yeah.... it kind of does, especially since you have a bottle hidden in your drawer which leads me to believe that you don't have the intention of stopping any time soon.

Now that I'm thinking about it, I don't know how the days work. I just assumed that if you fell of the wagon, then then you go back to day 1. That seems to be the most logical, but maybe I'm wrong?

For some reason, this is on my mind and bothering me this morning...

My xabf used to say "if I stopped drinking, you'd just find something else to get on me about"

Seriously? Try me.

Ugh!

Reminds me of an introduction to a course I had in college:
"The benefits of a course in Logic, are hardly debatable.":a122:

Broken - I've heard the same thing.
Over and over.

"if I stopped drinking, you'd just find something else to get on me about"

My answer is "maybe - but you would have to stop drinking to see if you are correct in predicting my future on that."

Firebolt and the milk induced heartburn -

xabf used to blame his pancreatitis on eating brownies or drinking milk the night before.

My xabf would get horrible, nearly debilitating stomach pains. He claims to have been to the ER in the past - on morphine - because of it. He'd have a bout of it every 6-8 months or so.

The last time it happened (while we were together) he went to the doctor, who gave him pills for indigestion.

He said before the appointment, "I'm willing to do anything they tell me to do just to get rid of this pain. I can't deal with this anymore". He thought maybe it was lactose intolerance or gluten intolerance (because, despite eating dairy and wheat products every day, that happens only every 6-8 months, right? lol)... anything BUT the alcohol. When I said "what if they told you it was the scotch?", he replied "it's not the scotch".

Ugh.

AX-"I'm going to be driving out there pretty soon, is it OK if I stop and see DS5?"

Me-"When are you coming?"

AX-"Oh, I don't really know, soon."

Me"We'll see."

AX"We'll see? WTF does that mean?"

Me"It means that IF you show up, and IF we're not busy, and IF you're sober then I will meet you out someplace so you can see DS5. And if this is some half-baked plan you and gf/aunt have cooked up to try and take off with him, then don't bother."

AX"How would I be drinking? I'll be driving. I haven't had a drink in months!"

Me"Good for you." Click.

My exabf after rehab
Ex: I never used to get sick when I was drinking the alchohol killed the germs and kept me healthy!!!

Smdh

My XAH...
Him: You know why I went to rehab really?
Me: Hmm...why?
Him: To get away from you!

What an idiot. One month with no pay, thousands of dollars for rehab, just to get away from little ole me:) *wink*

I have a talk with AH after finding another stash of bottles inside the drop ceiling and under a recliner - during this talk I tell him that when he has lied to me before when I asked him if he was drinking, it was really damaging as I decided back then I had to believe him and destroyed myself for his sake. (Took me long enough, but no longer believing anything he says these days)

Cut to 2 weeks later.

AH goes downstairs, comes back up a few minutes later, reeks of alcohol.

Me: Did you have a drink?

AH: No, I haven't been drinking! I just had some garlic bread, that must be what you're smelling.


'Cause garlic and wine, they smell exactly the same, right?

For future reference, other things that smell "exactly the same" as alcohol include but are not limited to: cat sweat, gasoline/diesel fuel, strong tea, vitamins, anything given to someone by a neighbor and pond water.
I'm sure I missed something, but those are the ones I remember hearing about from the exhole (thanks to NWGRITS for one of my favorite words of all time).

Apples. Nice, healthful apples apparently smell JUST like wine.

This made me laugh out loud - a nice way to start the day! :tyou

I only had two beers (after coming home from baseball game I wasn't allowed to attend BC no Sig others go, smell of alcohol coming out of his pores. Come to think of it he always only had two)

I sai d I go to AA when I was drinking alone. I'm not drinking alone. I was at a pub (by himself)

I never drink during the week ( he was drinking daily)

I don't need rehab alcohol hasn't interfered with my life (he blacked out from alcohol and didn't come see me in hospital, he had to call I'm sick to work, in Sig debt from drinking, has several DUI and no longer drives)

Oh forgot:

My therapist says I don't have a drinking problem and don't need her (after two sessions)

I can quit drinking by myself.I don't need a lesbian therapist or AA

Those darn lesbian therapists! Always telling us we don't have problems and don't need them!