Great news Pamel! 6 months will have passed before you know it. Glad we could boost your spirits, it's one of the things I love about this forum.

I'm sorry your BF is not able to be as satisfied with the outcome as you are, but please try not to let yourself feel guilty over it! He is choosing to let your consequences determine his choices; he doesn't have to, he's an adult.

I am so happy for you, Pamel. I also love traveling alone! As far as your BF goes, he's just going to have to get over it. I'd think he'd be happy that you didn't have to serve time in jail. I'm sure he is but sounds like he's caught up in poor me me me mode right now. Hopefully that won't last too long. Continue to work on your recovery and do your thing. Good luck and hugs to you.

Was not just speaking rhetorically about Do Good.

Do you know that? Really -- Do Good.

Really, we change our world by doing so. It is that reaping what we sow thing.

You have 6 months, are not doing pointless jail time, know where and when things are -- that is TOTALLY stable -- Now just add some Intentional Good.

Help you start a list if you want? Would bet you will find 6 Months is not enough to do the Good you could.

Good Things To Do When Parked for Six Months on Probation.

dunno what YOUR list would look like, but here is where I am guessing my 6 Months of Good List would start.

Volunteer at a Women's/Kids' Shelter.
Take-A-Meeting-Program to a Local Rehab or Lock Down.
Be part of, or help run A Step Study Program.
Teach English (or Chinese for you) at a local Community Center.
Volunteer for Reading to/with Kids at a local school or library.
Be part of some Adopt-a-Roadside with some local group or business.
Drug and Alcohol Education Program to local Schools, Scouts, Churches, etc.
Be a Speaker for "Speaker Night" at some of your area's AA.
(dunno, but maybe?) Go help your local MADD?

(anybody keep going)

Six Months. hmmm. Six Years would not be enough to the Good We Could.

Maybe get your grumpy guy to help you on some of those? If he is like me, he will (look like) bitch, pisss, and moan a little -- but will actually cherish the time with you and be thankful you have let him be part of something bigger than his own selfish interests.

I'm glad the court went better than you expected Pamel - and congrats on 90 days - awesome :)

D

Thanks Dee, for the congratulations. I am very fortunate.

Hammer, I appreciate all your suggestions. Don't mistake me, it is not me who is upset about the extra 6 months probation, it is the BF.

Currently, I:

Speak whenever asked at AA (I go to a meeting a day so a lot of people have asked). However I was a long-time member in NYC where being a speaker requires 90 days. That said, when in Rome… so where I now reside, if asked, I tell them my day count and if it is OK with that group I do it.

I speak often at the rehab as a recent "graduate".

My volunteer work at SPCA is ongoing, I volunteer with computer teaching at an assisted living facility, and will volunteer soon with underprivileged kids to teach them my craft: illustration. That is being arranged by my probation officer as per my request in December.

Have worked for a long time with our church with neighborhood clean-up efforts, and homeless outreach.

Teach English (as a second language)? Good idea. I taught at Berlitz in Paris about 100 years ago, so I know the program.

I am finishing up three illustrations for free use by the rehab and a couple of others. Then will list them as "stock" (I still need to make some money here!).

Putting together an art therapy program for the rehab at their request; should have the prospectus done next week.

Re the trouble with the BF:

Instead of being so defensive and guilty I decided to become pro-active and help him with some of his "messes". Heretofore, every messy area in our house (read: his house) has been "my" fault. Even his former MIL told me: "Why are you apologizing? You moved in to an already-occupied house!" True. However, if I help him sell a lot of his stored art collection (which he wants to do) using my major knowledge of Ebay and auction houses, and one of my dormant websites, two things are achieved: He gets going on something he needs and wants to do, and he has a project other than me. Things are already better between us and he spent yesterday shaping up that collection so I can code a template for him.

Usually creative "response" is better than "reaction". So far, so good.

Time for an update.

I am still a number, but with "privileges" (because I have gone over the top in behaving myself).

My probation may end as early as May (my court date went well-the judge added 6 months to the probation but may consider reducing that).

I couldn't be more happy that I am back to AA. Two service positions, a great sponsor, I have two home groups and go to at least one meeting a day, and give rides to some ladies in a halfway house.

The illustrations are almost finished and I have thought up more…

My freelance business is going well (almost TOO busy, but hey, I am not complaining!)

I can go out of state when I want as long as I inform probation.

The bf and I are in good standing. Occasionally he gets irrationally mad but I attribute that mostly to the stress of having my drunken self around for 3? years.

WHAT WAS I THINKING TO GO BACK TO DRINKING!!??

Answer: I wasn't thinking, I was reacting to too much stress and trying to do too many things with no relief. Well, the drinking REALLY helped all that.

I have no doubt that so much as one drink will refund all my misery, as they say in the rooms.

Thanks all, for putting up with me, for your valuable posts, and letting me "horn in" on Family and Friends; listening to your pain has been a great help in my staying sober.

More TK...

Pamel... there's only one way for you and that is up.

Stay sober and strong and life will treat you well!

Pamel, the system is not fair and is not designed to be fair. I have never met anyone with only 1 dui. Most people I know in recovery have 3 or 4 DUI's. The system is suppose to scare alcoholics into sobriety but it fails to do so.

Thanks for the update Pamel. You sound great! Keep up the good work.

Hugs!