atdawn your situation is very similar to mine. The 2 days is always sort of "I hope she forgot about what she said" (just another form of denial)--but for those 2 days you really are not 100% sure you and the kids are safe.

It took me awhile to leave AH--I am one week 2 (it seems longer). I left, took the kids and stayed in a hotel for about a week and during the week went back to an atty. I saw 8 months ago and told him it was time.

STBXAH is very angry and is playing the martyr--woe is me. I have to sleep in my van (doesn't he have any friends). Woe is me, I cannot afford child support (well if you would get a job instead of letting your wife support you and the kids by working 2 jobs).

The having him watch the kids thing is dangerous. He will not drive with them in the car when he is drinking will he? Even though money was tight (and still is) I put our 4 year old into preschool the day I came home in the midddle of the day to get something and found him rolling joints in the bathroom while our son sat in front of the TV. Did he get angryw hen I put our son in preschool-yes. And now I am responsible for all the financial trouble we are having too (not the fact that he only works half-time and now that he has all the free time--he should have no problem working...)

There is always some excuse and there always will be for whatever they do and nothing is ever their fault. The entire world revolved around them (they truly think they are the sun and the rest of us are the planets).

I am happy you made the decison to take care of yourself and your kids. It is rough and if the last week for me is any indication--he will try to worm his way back into your life because it worked before. He will probably be mad because his lifestyle is now over as he knows it.

atdawn,

The isolation that your husband has created for you is something I see in my husband as well. Luckily, I have been able to reconnect with my family over this, and by confiding in my sister she now sees that the distance I placed between us was really my husband's way of trying to manipulate me. Stillwaters is right...find some support. We are here...go to Alanon...call the hotlines in your area that can help you. Lastly, make sure your psych leaves you a referral number in case you need to talk to him/her while he/she is on vacation. Even just a phone conversation with a professional can keep you feeling safer.

You are in my prayers today!