I always appreciate anyone's input. As has been said I can either take it or leave it.

I do feel that SR has gotten a little agressive recently. There seems to be a dip in the amount of understaning, compassion, patience and tolerance being shown toward one another. Yet, it is winter and it is the holidays. I tend to think that the dark short days, the cold, the pictures and films of family togetherness and the perfect home life, can get us all down more than we realise. I think they call it 'Seasonal Affectiveness Disorder' or SAD for short.

I have complete confidence that when the days begin to legthen and we begin to see more sunshine, our thoughts and moods will be lifted too.

Please everyone reading.... Please pass any input you wish over any of my threads, you help me grow!

Lily xxxxxxxxxx

Sorry to drag this out of the files... but LTD... you said it best right here!

Very appropriate for this evening!

P.S. I remember when you joined... and thinking about how proud I was of your recovery :)

I came here and was still in a bit of wallowing, victimy mode, lots of reasons why things couldn't change and was hoping for AH to change BUT over the past month a lot of things HAVE changed and I think my frustration earlier tonight stemmed from the fact that I don't feel nor am I acting anything like the person I was when I first came here and I couldn't get that across....

I guess ultimately all that matters is the truth I know and that I am living my life differently day by day.

I think just as we should all be open to what others have to tell us we should do just as good a job of listening as we do suggesting bc I did and do feel that a lot of what I said got lost in the midst of tunnel vision at moments tonight... (not you LTD-- I'm just speaking generically)

Thanks for the bump, GB. BTW, I remember when I first joined how much I admired you for being able to stay and detach. I could not do it. To me, you had more strength than I could imagine.

After my last post, I was going to go searching for some old threads of mine to bump rather than typing my whole story again. But, my daughter needed some serious one-on-one mom time with me. (She's 18 and trying to decide what to do with her life. :))

L

LTD, you're one of the bright shining lights that I've followed since I joined SR. And your journey is ahead of mine, but I can relate to all of it. Except I had not seen the irritability with people who Just. Won't. Do. Things. My. Way. as an extended codie thing. But you're right.

Keep on posting. Keep on sharing your insights. There will be people who don't like what you have to say just like there will be people who don't like what I have to say. But every day I go to an Al-Anon meeting and share, I think "maybe this can help someone other than me" -- and I think it's the same here. You never know the impact your experiences might have. So keep sharing. You are loved.

That just knocked me to my knees.

I did stay and I did detach... but I think it was because I was just not ready to sit completely in reality. I had not hit my bottom yet. I worked on me because I knew I was part of the problem. I wanted to know that if the relationship went terminal... I wanted to know I tried and did my best.

The odd thing is... that even though I'm ready to go... I still worry that I should have done more. I still wrangle with the guilt.


Your statement is a nice reminder that we compare our insides to others outsides... and what we "see" isnt' the whole story.