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-   -   Why did it take so long..... (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-alcoholics/107446-why-did-take-so-long.html)

UhaneKai 11-09-2006 04:58 PM

Why did it take so long.....
 
for me to realize COMPLETELY. I mean, I knew that my BF had a problem.....it had been worse, it's gotten a lot better....but it all makes sense....HE'S AN ALCOHOLIC.

- the little lies or being late because he's out drinking
- the urge to have a drink in his hand all of the time
- the selfishness he has but he accuses me of being selfish
- the little quality time we spend together
- how he 'picks' on me like a kid, he can't sit still and just cuddle
- we never have deep conversations unless it's an argument
- always a bottle of wine at home
- always wanting to 'go out with the guys' or be 'social'
Plus- he's a bartender, trying to support his 2 girls who have moved away again for the 2nd time. Okay- see, right there....I just defended him. I have to stop doing that. "But I don't understand", "I'm not in his shoes"....blah blah blah. I'm sick of it now. I love him, I care for him....but I gotta quit giving in.

FriendofBill 11-09-2006 05:19 PM

Why?

Denial.

Same as the rest of us. No one is immune to the affects of alcoholism. You are not that lucky.

FormerDoormat 11-09-2006 06:02 PM

Some of us are a little slower than others. It took me 24 years to come to the same realization.


I love him, I care for him....but I gotta quit giving in.
Sounds like a very good plan!

parentrecovers 11-10-2006 06:50 AM

we see what we want to see..denial. k


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