I'm a failure. :(
 

I made it one week and was thrilled.

I slipped.

I made it two weeks and was doubly thrilled.

I slipped.

Maybe some people just aren't strong enough. Maybe some people have a brain chemistry where success is not possible??

I remember feeling like that.

I drank every single day for over 27 years. The last 10 - 15 years I knew I had to quit drinking. I tried everything.

You will stop when you sink low enough and you can't do it anymore. That is how I stopped. I haven't had a drink in over one year.

Let me see if I understand you correctly. In the past fourteen days or so, you were sober for thirteen of them, and not sober for one of them. Is that right?

It sounds to me like you were successful on over 92% of those days. Hardly a failure, IMHO.

Now just try to improve your success rate.

Thanks, Doug. I just don't want to slip further. :(

Wow. That's a really neat way to think of it. I'm so grateful for these words.

Well, when I first tried to stop I made it three days. The next time I tried to stop I made it three days. The next time I tried to stop I think I made it four days.
I've made it as long as seven months. I've made it as little as a day.

But you know what? I never gave up trying and I mean I tried to stop for years.
Many years. Sure it was demoralizing, but I finally sought help because it became obvious to me, through my thick skull, that I couldn't quit on my own.

I came here. I went to AA meetings. Still I would relapse.
It took a particularly bad withdrawal, after a five day binge, that I realized I had to stop or die.

You're not wired to not be able to stop drinking. No one is. And I was a bad drunk for over thirty years.
I hope you can seek help and save yourself the nightmare that was my drinking life.
You can quit. I know you can. The only thing you need is to keep trying.

Best to you.

Maybe some people need to stop listening to their addiction, or stop giving so much strength to their negative thoughts.

No I don't believe that.

If you have enough cognitive function to use the internet you can stay sober :)

Obviously whatever your recovery plan is - the things you're doing to stay sober - it needs some work...or more elements.

start from scratch - make a plan.

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...very-plan.html

I really don't believe sobriety is something where we can just 'wing it' and hope for the best.

You're not a failure :)

You can do this - just focus and make the changes you know you need to.

D

Just keep trying, so hard. That’s all any of us can do. Words like failure to describe yourself aren’t cool though. You failed to stay sober, but you are strong and beautiful, not a failure. Try again, my dear. Don’t sink further, it won’t help.

Doesn't sound like a failure , sounds like a classic success story of the person that never gives up.

:You_Rock_

Sohard - I felt the same way a few times. Here I am with almost 10 yrs. sober, after drinking all my life. I know it can be done. You are learning something, & will be victorious.

I didn't stay sober after I joined here. Kept relapsing and felt worthless. :( But thanks to the good folks here encouraging me to try again, I did, until I finally 'got it'. :)

Never give up! :) Try until you make it.

Sounds like you are trying. Keep going to bat, you can hit a home run.

SoHard,

Suspecting or believing you are a failure or one of the unfortunates who is doomed to drink until you die is simply your addiction pulling a fast one on you. IT wants you to think you have no choice about drinking. IT wants you to throw up your hands and quit quitting because "what's the use anyhow?"

IT is a selfish jerk that only wants booze. IT doesn't care if that harms you, your relationships, your driving record or anything else. IT only wants booze.

That jerk can go stuff it. YOU are stronger than it is.

Like Dee is always saying, you need a plan and you need to execute it. (He's a smart man, that Dee.) And you need to execute it Every Single Day. You need to practice your sober skills daily so that you will be armed the next time IT comes calling. Then you'll see what a pesky little weasel it is and you'll get busy doing something more important than drinking - which is just about Anything Else.

Ok, first goal: 7 days.
You've done that successfully, so do it again.
Then set a new one - clearly 30 days was too far out, huhn?

Hugs, SoHard, I know you want this enough to do it.

O

p.s. How about those meetings?

Give it another shot!!

Check in tomorrow with your morning coffee for your fresh start. We’ll be here.

One week the first time
Two weeks the second... That's a lot better than the majority of us on this forum do/did, Sohard.
So now - this time around, why not, just for a start-off, aim for three weeks? Once you are there, then you can think "MORE"... But that's what I think might work for you.
Good Luck.

Your not a failure.
Everyone can stop.
Only those who dont want to stop dont stop until their health stops to the stage they lose autonomy.

Sounds to me like you are on the good path.

How you doing, SoDear?

yes, sohard, some people arent strong enough to do it on their own. "im never drinking again" and "im done forever" and "i promoise" and all the other phrases just arent enough. help outside of themselves is necessary- therapy,counselors, recovery programs and meetings- making changes because if nothing changes then nothing changes.

please dont use,"Maybe some people have a brain chemistry where success is not possible " as an excuse to keep drinking.
actually, please dont use,"Maybe some people just aren't strong enough " as an excuse either.

get into action, sohard.
youre worth it.