I will never detox again.
 

Just wanted to write that I am at work and can't believe I used to come in here in a panic, shaking and unable to tolerate even one hour.

I actually enjoy work now. I notice things I never noticed before and don't run away from conversations.

Also, I just realized I am the only person who tries to hide opening a can of pop at lunch (I used to put my hand over it to try and "mute" the sound when drinking so my neighbor wouldn't know how many beers I had). I also just crushed it before throwing it in the trash as paper-flat as I could. My coworker asked me why I do this.

Thanks for the support all.

I don't miss having something to hide :)

It really does feel great to not have to hide anything :)

Great realization BlueEyes, it's really good to hear that you are doing well.

I lived at home for a year and started taking two minutes to take the tops off the bottles....reeeeeaalllly quietly �� I too feel a little self conscious sometimes cracking a can of soft drink in public. It's funny the associations we hang on to.

P

Good for you BBE, its nice being able to look people in the eye right?

"I notice things I never noticed before.."

something that blew me away:
i loved( and still love) being in the outdoors. loved being out in the woods.
a little time sober and i realized i never noticed the different shades of green out in the woods. its not all just green!

I was saying this 100 days ago:

I go back to work after a 3 month leave on Monday, February 6. I hope I end up saying this:

I used to hide at work when I was detoxing all the time.

I agree with tomsteve regarding the ability to discern various shades of color much better.

It was almost like transitioning from black and white television to a color tv.

I learned to open three beers simultaneous so if the neighbors were counting they would only have counted 1/3. So freeing being honest and sober.

Every week I went to seven different stores to buy alcohol - one for every day of the week - so not to look like an alcoholic.

I also used to hate coming home in the summertime with beer and have my neighbors see me bringing it in everyday.

Glad that pain in my a$$ task is in my past.

I am still slowly getting rid of the cardboard cases I would fold and hide. I would never drink when I had my daughter, but she started finding them in the garbage after a weeked at dads. So, I started folding them and hiding them under my mattress. I can't believe how many are under there.

I can't believe how much LESS trash I have.

My recycle bin would be overflowing with beer cans every week - these days I have a hard time filling it with trash.