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Diary of a Mad Cow, Part III - Beware all ye who enter! 1 Attachment(s) I back bitches! For those who not know Cow, it all start here: http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...y-mad-cow.html Then it go on ad nauseum here, http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...r-edition.html And now we here. Which is where, you ask? Well, I sad to report that I still in furious struggle with self. FURIOUS. I mean is like "Fight Club" Brad Pitt punching crap out of "Fight Club" Ed Norton! Only, we both looking like Brad Pitt, of course, because Cow very, very attractive superstar and such. Anyways, little lambs, I working on it still, and was hoping I come back with better news to you, but, at least I come back. Enough about Cow, how is you all doing. |
I think you just broke the first 2 rules of fight club Cow. Wouldn't expect anything less from you. Glad to see you posting. |
I'm happy to see you too Cow. |
I was just this very moment thinking about you, Cow. Seriously, this very moment. I think I might be psychic or something. Wow. I think of you and there you are. Maybe I will go think on George Clooney now..... Very glad you are here! :) |
Welcome back Cow! How your udder be hanging gal? |
(((((Hooker))))) !!! We moo-sed you. Ok, that was a stretch. But whatever. I can get away with it right now because I'm having a hysterectomy and that gives me carte Blanche for bad puns. Hey - We can be sans lady parts twins. Who's gonna mess with a peri-menopausal cow toting around a 16 lb calicified fibroid ? ;) Have bowling ball, will travel (?) K....stopping now... XO AO |
Hey Cow!!! Glad to see you! MOOHOO!!! |
Glad to see you, Cow. Buildings are exploding & the President drove by yesterday in his motorcade, but that's normal in my neighborhood. Otherwise, nothing to complain of (but I will anyway, loud & often). |
Oh hello everyone, yes, I take time off from SOBER RECOVERY site to focus on my sobriety. Ha ha moo ha! But no! Is true! Was thinking I not sure if this site healthy and productive to me. Is because I a writer for living and for decades have associate writing with drinking. Also, I now willing to accept I maybe bipolar underneath my addictions. Bipolar alcoholic writer. Wow. Can Cow be any more cliche?! Frak! PS. My fibroids is adorable and very petite! |
Writers and alcohol are often bedfellows, aren't they? I was just explaining to my shrink yesterday about how the fifteen years I spent studying poetry / being a poet came with the rider of carefully-cultivated alcoholism as part of one's social obligation. She thought it was pretty funny until I told her how many of my poet-friends from grad school were either dead (suicide usually--very hazardous profession) or now entering late-stage alcoholism. I can't even hang around them (the small group that is left) anymore. Drinking always primed the muse, but lately I am finding she doesn't mind early morning herbal tea and discipline. That's been a revelation. . . |
Welcome back Cow :) D |
Hi, Cow! |
This is moovelous news! Welcome back! |
You mentioned that you were a professional writer--you might be interested in this. One of the requirements is to have a lot of social media connections. I have traveled across the US and Canada by trains many times, and it is life-changing to truly feel how big this country is. It's also cathartic to meet its people along the way. And if you have never traveled in a private room, well--you've never really traveled. Anyway, Amtrak is offering free trips to writers: #AmtrakResidency: Application Form |
Everybody still here! If I not severe anhedonic, that total would make me happy. Hawkeye, you lucky, my muse not get out of bed for less than $10,000 and nice bottle of Malbec. Yes, is lot of writer who is into the drug and drink. Is chicken/egg situations. I think early trauma make for lot of artists, and lot of addiction. D! ... ... wait, you not here to arrests me already, right? Welcome Coldfusion, I not kind of writer where I can travel about and write whatever I wish. I work on shows and advertisements and stuff and has to be available. I does take train trip once, because [PHOBIA ALERT!] I afraid to fly. I sorry but Cows is not belong in sky! Unless I jumping over moon, and I not do hallucinogens anymore. I does love Canada, would be cool to train across Canada. |
$10,000 even without the Malbec sounds pretty good Cow ;) Poets (might as well) work for free. I also thought that was a job requirement. Stoopid me Have you seen some of the amazing trips you can take on Canadian Railways? http://www.royalcanadianpacific.com/luxury.html Packages | Canada Rail Vacations How's Oscar, by the way? |
Cow, just curious - why do you think it is you are still sober? Today I read through a lot of your journey - and I did read the part about the accident - but is the trauma/reality of the accident is what's sustaining you? I am still struggling, so just being nosey ;) |
Hawkeye, Oscar is have huge bloom right now and as tricksy as ever. Thank you for links. No, I not get $10K day rate, I just making Linda Evangelista joke. But my muse certainly not getting out of bed for tea. Freethink, no, I not sober. I was for short times during my tediously verbose threads, but it not take. It not stick. So I still struggling with you. Right now, I working to improve my physical health and bipolar condition, cuz is always when my brain go off/manic that I end up face down in bowl of Malbec. |
Originally Posted by Cow
(Post 4525783)
Hawkeye, Oscar is have huge bloom right now and as tricksy as ever. Thank you for links. No, I not get $10K day rate, I just making Linda Evangelista joke. But my muse certainly not getting out of bed for tea. Freethink, no, I not sober. I was for short times during my tediously verbose threads, but it not take. It not stick. So I still struggling with you. Right now, I working to improve my physical health and bipolar condition, cuz is always when my brain go off/manic that I end up face down in bowl of Malbec. I know you don't like to post in other people's threads for some reason (so I don't expect you to know my situation), but I am struggling with "mental" stuff as well. It can be a whole, complicated mess, huh. Anyway, please keep posting when you feel fit to. I enjoy your "cow" honesty. |
Cow ive been reading your threads, they have made my day, as you combine the awfulness of dealing with addiction/withdrawal/consequences with comedy, and have mad me sad and happy in equal measures. Best wishes to you, hope you make it x |
Yesssssssss the cow is back. Missed your posts. |
I don't know you, Cow But I love you already. |
Dear (((cow))). So glad you're back. My psychiatrist told me he thought being creative was a way to survive. I, on the other hand thought maybe I created my own trauma dramas because I was bored and not creative enough to be constructive. LOL. it took me a long time to learn to roll with it. These days I remember I don't have to sparkle daily. LOL love to you. Lenina Moonpie |
Moo Mwah, sweet Lenina. Trust me, Cow not doing any sparkling. Last time Cow sparkle was in 90's. Freethink, I does post on other thread while I away, just like everybody always have encourage me to do ...and was terrible! Awful! Nobody talk back to me! And poster just disappear! Is much cozier in here. Look, I buy new throw pillows. Plus I not has to watch my language, or be worry about offending -cuz everybody here already know I very offensive and cuss like longshorecow. Okay I just throw out all caffeine, sugar, and wine opener. Landfill already has 5,000 of my wine opener. But, even though I destroying environment with excess wine opener waste, I think is right thing to do, yes? |
OMG and 1/2 Cow, you weren't joking! You did venture out to neighboring pastures…!!!!!:) I am so bummed I missed it, it would have been like running into Prince Charles at the carwash. So glad you are back. I imagine there is a satellite image of your local landfill and some cosmonauts scratching their heads…."it sort of looks like acres of wine screws…" |
Originally Posted by Cow
(Post 4526440)
I does post on other thread while I away, just like everybody always have encourage me to do ...and was terrible! Awful! (I read your outside posts and thought they were helpful. You never know who's getting support from your posts on SR -- it's ok to scatter the seeds widely. You have no shortage of them.) How about you don't buy any Malbec today and tell us something concrete about your life. Are you getting any outside support to get sober? Seeing a doctor? Talking to a friend? I know you have neighbors -- do you have friends? |
Wow. That is one snarky bunny. I has lot of friends. They all drinkers but they does hope I successful to stop drinking. They not "supporting" me, cuz I not even know what that mean. They got they own problems, and I been drunk Cow for decades, so is lot of fatigue about the subject. Even to me, is all blobbity blah blah. Don't even want to hear my own self talking about it anymore, is all has been said. Time to shut up and get it done. As for my family, as has been previously and well established, they is crap. So, I pretty much on my own with this one. But that okay, is down to me, is up to me. I a lone cow, moooooooo. But serious, I feel very strongly is only me gonna pull this thorn from my side. |
Originally Posted by Cow
(Post 4527599)
Wow. That is one snarky bunny. As for doing it on your own, I respect that. It hasn't worked for me. The only progress I've made in the last 1.5 years has been on the occasions when I've yelped for help. |
Cow, you are hillarious; so glad you came back; nice to meet you. I was drinking coffee when I read your posts; almost choked, thank you very much. It was worth it. |
Cow, I am right there with you - unable to find that magic bullet to stay sober. I imagine it is frustrating for our friends when we just can't be told anything. I can't be told much either. But it's kind of like a moot point for me to bring that to your attention. It must be a blessing and a sword to be so intelligent (and I mean that, sincerely). I'm off to pretend to play housewife, will undoubtedly fail by 8pm. Dinner is made at least. |
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