When you turned the corner with alcohol
 

Was there a specific moment in your life when you remember you made a conscious decision to drink heavily for a while or was your problem drinking totally progressive with no big turning points? I remember losing a job about 3 years ago and telling myself right after I was going to get well buzzed for a few days..maybe a week tops. Two and a half years later I was still stuck on that thought. Almost immediately I was up to a 18+ beer a day habit about 3-4 days a week. I made a decision I was going to abuse alcohol at a very vulnerable time in my life. It served a purpose of letting me sort of forget about things. That was a luxury I couldn't turn down for a while. I went from a social drinker to a heavy binge drinker overnight.

Yeah kind'a. I had quit on and off for a year or so. Then last year I just finally got sick of it all and all that goes with drinking. So I just flat quite then one day.. Been about 6 months now, hope it's for good, we'll see. Was Dec 16 right after my 41st B-day lol

It's not important to me as I concentrate on recovery not escape. BE WELL

My journey was a progressive one - I made no big decisions, just lots of small ones.

I got carried along in the tide, really.

D

None of the decisions I made felt like decisions at the time. I can recall wishing that I didn't have to always decide to have another. At the time, all those little decisions seemed overwhelmingly inevitable.

Now of course it all seems silly.

Same here.

I remember the exact spot where I realized I had a big problem. I think I was 20 yr's old. I played in a band,and we were hauling band equipment to a party.
I knew I needed to slow down,there was a long night ahead. But I remember the exact stop light where I said the hell with it,I'll drink another one.
I drank "another one's" for 30 more years before I quit.

Fred

I used alcohol for many reasons, one reoccurring reason was to stop thought. It did work for a very long time. I was too ashamed to seek help for my mental disturbances so I kept on self-medicating. The problem of course was that alcohol was a greedy and needy remedy: eventually I found myself either drunk or recovering from drinking. It took over more and more of my life.

I try to sit with pain now and realize that my thoughts are temporary and will soon pass. I meditate often now and really enjoy just experiencing life As it comes, sober.

The only decision I remember making was the one to stop drinking.

I've turned the corner with alcohol enough times that I've ended up right back where I started.

Drank for 15 years, quit for 7 years, drank for 1 year, quit for 7 years, drank for 8 years, now sober for 49 days. I have gone around the block and looking to avoid any more corners. :)

When I was eleven I got drunk for the first time. I loved the feeling and from that moment on it was out of my hands. I hit the bottle at every opportunity.

things that I would have never chosen to do
 

I always knew I had an addictive personality and that I used substances and behaviors to "escape" life and uncomfortable feelings. So for decades I was vigilant against booze and drugs. Then...life happened, a LOT of life happened at once and I decided "hang it"...most people my age drank to relax, why shouldn't I? And I let my guard down and in no time at all I was out of control. Being drunk/high became my new hobby. All encompassing.I surrendered to it, then pursued it with a sick passion.

My story is similar to Threshold's.
I was never a social drinker. When I was a teen, I drank to get very drunk and not feel pain. Then I did not drink for 16 years. Then I drank and alcohol was immediately a problem again.

I don't know that I ever made a "conscious decision" to drink heavily. Small amounts of alcohol stopped giving me the buzz that I was searching for, so I gradually increased the dosage to get the same effect. There eventually came a day when I would black-out before the buzz showed up.

My drinking was mostly binge drinking, so I did drink quickly and a lot. And I do think a lot of that was a conscious effort on my part, yes. But over time, from my early 20's to my mid 30's it progressed some... my typical was 3-4 nights per week, up to 2 bottles of wine a night. I certainly didn't start out drinking that much. But, from the beginning I knew I was drinking to get a buzz and to get drunk.

I was having a difficult time at work due to a position change and alcohol-driven anxiety. I was so stressed that I just said "___ it" and just stopped going into work. Didn't quit, didn't get fired. Just stopped going. LOL? Dropped off the grid and started drinking, full-time. I remember thinking that I'd worked for 10 years at this job and made a lot of money, and now would be a good time to start spending it. A year-and-a-half later, I was broke, alone, and in the hospital.

I prefer to focus on my positive memories, like the first day out of treatment, when I got off the train and walked right by the liquor store and didn't stop in there. It was a real hard thing to do, I remember it vividly, I can remember the weather and everything. That was a cool moment, I look back fondly on that one.