Trying to quit.
 

I have been an alcoholic for over 10 years. I have had brief periods of sobriety during that time, the longest being 2 years. For the past 4 1/2 years I have been drinking vodka every day. I am at the point now where a 1.75 liter of cheap vodka lasts about 3 days. I have to take at least 3-4 shots as soon as I wake up every day. first thing it effected was my eating. some days i don't eat at all, some days i eat 4 or 5 full meals. now i sweat all night, wake up at 5 am even if i went to sleep at 1 am, i poop at least 7 times a day, if i eat i get tired and take a nap and when i wake up, i feel sick and drink water and throw up. i throw up at least once if not twice daily. i sweat on my forehead, upper lip and hands without exercise unless i have enough liquor in my system. Ive had a pain in my lower right side that doesn't go away since October. i cant afford to see a doctor. AA doesn't work for me. Ive had just about enough of this and was wondering the best way to quit while avoiding the side effects/cravings. somebody please help.:a108:

Why not once again do whatever it was you were doing when you put together the 2 years? And then instead of drinking at the end of that time, continue to do it?

I was in prison for the 2 years. i don't want to go back there! i have 2 children that need me. sober living or rehab is not an option.

Ok.. sober living, rehab, AA are all not options. What about counseling? Outpatient rehab? I found I really couldn't commit to and succeed with recovery until I was at a place where everything was an option, I was desperate. Ultimately, I saw a counselor 2x a week for half a year or so, participated here a ton.. just passed my 3 years and have never been happier.

Welcome!

I can tell you I was on a spin for the last 10 years, and was constantly telling myself that i needed to stop. I can tell you that during that time i did not stop. I can tell you that during the last 2 months before I stopped, I was late on a couple of bills.

But I had money to drink, every single day...and because I didn't stop on my own, eventually something bad happened and law enforcement became involved. That was 14days ago, I'm now on day 13 sober.

Although my current problems have and will continue to cost me a lot of money, I will probably be able to pay that and keep up with my bills since the bars no longer are getting my cash. You stated you cannot afford health insurence or a deductable, consider this dynamic.

If you are unable to stop on your own, by whatever means that work, chances are sooner or later you will be interacting with law enforcement again. This is what made you stop last time, and you stated that you never want to go back. Perhaps use this is one of several motives to do what is required.

Being in my own struggle and a newbie in recovery, I can't add a whole lot more then the above, but I do wish you the very best and hope you continue on this site. I hope you are able to find a way to do what must be done.

You can read the Big Book (free online) without going to AA

Hi stress case :)

Welcome

There's many different approaches and methods of recovery around - here's some links to some of the main players:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html

I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum if you think you may benefit from a non 12 step approach.

As far as not being able to see a Dr goes - I think it's important especially if you're experiencing pain.

Many areas of the US now have free or low cost clinics - check your local area here:
Free/Low-Cost/Sliding-Scale Clinics

D

Everyone here advises people to go the ER. I think that would be your best option to start out with. If you don't stop drinking or you die trying to stop, you are not going to be around for your kids.

Welcome stresscase,

I will offer my two cents worth, because I can so relate to where you are at right now. In your condition, I am not sure there is a way to quit without going through physical withdrawal, unless it is done under the guidance of a physician. You should become informed of the health risks of suddenly stopping cold turkey without a doctor's guidance.

That said, if one quits cold turkey from your level of drinking, there will likely be physical discomfort for a least a few days; as well, there may be a lingering psychological depression of sorts; and, there will most likely be CRAVINGS. Getting past the physical and psychological initially may be easier than getting rid of the cravings. But, sometimes the cravings largely disappear with a profound change in your thinking. And, fortunately, there are ways to reprogram your thinking.

It wasn't too long ago that I was in your shoes. I would begin drinking often at 4am, and drink all day long, until passing out at night. This went on for more than a decade. I am very familiar with all of the physical symptoms you are describing. I know that pit you are in, but I am not there now.

So, it is obvious to you, and to anyone reading your post, that you need to stop drinking. Please get involved in perusing all different sections of this website, in all the different areas. The SR site is a treasure trove of information, direction to other resources, as well as support and insight from others who can share their wisdom and experience. I was in a state similar to yours, but because of my interaction with others on this site, and because of what I learned through this site, I overcame my addiction.

Somehow, through interaction with others here, I realized that I cannot drink ever again. For years, I could only get 1-2 days at a time without alcohol. Usually it was 20-30 units a day. Long before I actually quit, I knew I was in big trouble. There is no moderation for me. It is full-on or nothing. It sounds like you are pretty beat up by alcohol. ARE YOU READY TO QUIT YET?

Then quit. You may need help to sustain your sobriety once you stop, but first you must stop. Again, quitting without medical supervision is done at your own risk. But that is what I did.

So, if you ARE able to quit, then what? Well, of course, you are aware of AA. That is good that you are aware of it. It works for many, but not for all. It was not the answer for me. I never could swallow that I was powerless. I want you to be aware of another, completely different approach. It is called AVRT, and is presented in its complete form in a book by Jack Trimpey, called "Rational Recovery: A New Cure For Substance Addiction".

Whatever path enables your recovery, I am for it. I am for AA if it helps an individual, and I know many who have recovered this way. I can tell you that, for me, rehab did not do it, nor did multiple serious attempts at 12-step recovery through AA, nor did Smart Recovery meetings, nor did counseling in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, nor did anti-drinking medication, nor did religion. I tried all those things to cure myself, but all of them absolutely failed (this is just MY history...those methods clearly have clearly proven effective for certain other individuals).

What did cure me is that somehow, some way...I FINALLY realized that I CANNOT DRINK. I CANNOT DRINK, OR I WILL BE WHERE YOU ARE NOW.

This realization IS possible, stresscase. One can tell themselves for years that they must stop the misery train they are on, repeatedly wrecking themselves with addiction. But, even after years of this ineffective internal conversation and half-hearted resolution to quit, a mental shift can occur in your mind. This is where your thinking changes completely, and you realize in full truth the meaning of the statement "I MUST NOT DRINK! I CANNOT DRINK!" If/when this occurs, your entire reality can be different. Do you have any dreams you still want to realize? Can you imagine yourself without alcohol? You haven't given up yet.

It does not necessarily take long for your life to completely change, and for you to be back in control, living a clean life, feeling gratitude for being free of the poison.

For me, I had to realize that I CANNOT DRINK. AND I WILL NOT DRINK. The Rational Recovery book is a guidebook to help facilitate this mental realization, and to nurture it after it happens. There are no guarantees anywhere, my friend. I am just telling you how I quit. I wish I had known about the RR book long ago, which is why I feel compelled to tell you.

Whatever way it happens, you gotta quit. The party is clearly over. It was over a long time ago. Please keep sharing, as we are all here just to help you.

Rather, I think we are all here to help each other.

hereigo,
i like what you wrote. The way I visualize things for myself is: A few years ago I began drinking too much and I knew I was getting on a "slippery slope". Well it gets steeper and more slippery as time passes. I was drinking more and more often. At first, little funny or embarrassing things happen that you may or may not regret. Then you start to lose important things & more humiliating things happen. Then costly (expensive things occur.) Later the police come to your house for one reason or another. You get the picture.

Now if I can do 3 days sober, that is where I was 3 months ago, if I can go 5 days, I was where I was at 6 months ago. One month sober-that is where I was 5 years ago. I could slowly claw out, maybe still drink? But I have decided something-I want off the slippery slope all together. It just isn't where I want to be anymore. There is only one way to be free for me and it is complete abstinence. I want that freedom!

Another thing I think is it is hard to realize is that you probably have the answers already. They are buried deep in yourself. AA is not for me because I was so beaten down my early life I can't take the "you are powerless". I needed to learn to harness my inner power that was there all along. I needed to believe in myself. I was severely abused for the first 18 years of my life and it profoundly shaped my personality and of course contributed to some of my problems. So certain types of support such as mind training or relearning of destructive attitudes towards myself were most important. People are unique and complicated. And they drink for different reasons. If you look at yourself you may already know what will or will not work for you. I think programs are just tools to examine yourself. Don't just follow a program do the self work necessary to get well. Hopefully we all find what really works for us.

Hereigo, It took you awhile but that is what you did.

It's AA or die from this condition.It doesn't matter if you like AA or not,there is no other way to survive this.You can't just sit at home and read the AA book and get sober by yourself.

Well there are ways other than AA but you have to find your own unique way of recovery. For me is a combination of AA, this website, and keeping myself busy at all times so that I dont drink

I'm sorry Steve, I respect your opinion and i'm glad AA has worked for you but I do not believe statements like this are going to be of much help to the OP. There ARE many, mant other ways to treat alcoholism. The people of this board can attest to that; many use a 'toolbag' full of ideas and behaviors garnered from numerous recovery programs.

Admitting you have a problem is a start. There is no easy way. Keep trying different methods until you find one that works for you.

WOW! There is some real good advice and experience in this post.

Stresscase, I hope you find your way on your terms, if that is what it will take. I do not think it is a one size fits all program. I am only on day 4 myself and I am still dealing with physical issues. I know I have to go through this to keep progressing. I wish you all the best. I know for me I have had to let go and let someone or something take it out if my hands because I can not do it myself. Being here with others that understand me realy is helping. I know for me in the past when I manage to be either sober or abstonate from alcohol whetever method I used worked if I worked it. I hope you find what works for you, until then as hereigo said, we are all her for each other.

Yes, I believe that people can recover successfully from addiction in many different ways. I know AA works for many; I have seen it and I know many people who are living testaments to it. I have also seen people recover in a more specifically religious program, such as dedicating their life to Christ. There are many other ways, too.

But, for me, AVRT is a perfect fit. It is understandable how people want to share their experience, and that is what this site is about. We have to be careful not to step on each others' toes, because this site is about helping each other. I am learning this, more and more. I am stoked that I finally found my path to sobriety, and I want to see each other person find theirs, as well. Even if it is different than mine.

Still working at it
 

I haven't quit or cut down as of yet. After researching the subject of detox, I've come to the conclusion that cold turkey could kill me at the level of alcohol I'm consuming every day. I'm going to start with a pint a day for a week and go down from there. Not sure when I will start. I keep telling myself that today is the day and end up drinking too much. I guess I will start tomorrow. Thank you everybody for your support. One day at a time.:c020:

Alcohol will stop you soon,you'll end up in hospital most likely.There is no way that a broken mind like yours is going to fix itself.You are an alcoholic that is going to have a crisis in his life.It won't be pretty.

Cheers,Steve

The above is one of several things that I have come to accept and is among the many reasons that I have decided to stop TODAY. Not next week, not after the Superbowl, not after the next party. NOW! There is no reason for me to continue drinking, absolutely no reason whatsoever. I stopped for 10 days two months ago in Dec, 2011 and not a single withdrawal symptom. I actually felt great and empowered the minute I made the decision in the morning of Dec 2, 2011. Every day I felt better and even the bags under my eyes cleared up within a few days and the redness in my face must have cleared up at least by 75%.

I believe the longer I keep drinking the worse things will get sooner or later, I will experience some tragedy and will look back and wish I had stopped sooner when all was realitively well. Even now I reflect and look back and think if only I had continued when I stopped in 2007 I would be 4 1/2 years without a drink. How much better would I have been.

Stesscase - Make the committment, get assistance from the pros for your anticipated withdrawals and do it now.