After several attempts to quit and stay quit on my own over the years I finally decided to give AA a try. AA is working for me. AA is not for everyone and at 20 meetings I think you did a pretty good evalution of the program.

If you find you are having difficulty quitting on your own, or you relapse after a period of time, you can always come back to AA.

Good for you RU. You went to some meetings and now you're not. And you don't think you'll need to go to any more ever. Completely understand, as I was a few months sober once too.

Not sure why you'd think anyone would be concerned. I wouldn't expect you to get riled up if I did or not, and I doubt if the hundreds who came and went during your months of attendance are realistically on your mind much. Doubt if you gave or nowadays give them much thought at all.

For clarity, people care about your situation as much as you cared about all those strangers.

If you decide that you will never again ride the bus, or to change the brand of handsoap you're using, expect that to shake the world just as much as announcing you've decided to not go to AA meetings.

People usually care about what affects them. This doesn't.

But, thanks for the notification. If next month you decide to go, that's nice too.

I guess my question is why are people so adamant about proclaiming they don't use AA. Its like a sorce of pride "and I quit drinking without AA" I see it quite. Frequently on here. I mean...there is no special. Reward for getting sober without the help of AA, a spo
nsor and the steps...or is there :)

Of course it's a source of pride any decent alchie or drunk thinks they are unique and can do things there way, look at the stats most go on to death after a long life of misery for them and anyone who comes into contact with them with this belief...i absolutely relate to this and held the belief i was the "exception to the rule" for many years and it nearly killed me too...No friggin way i would have gone to AA and done what was suggested until it was last chance saloon, i couldn't relate to a bunch of sad losers sitting round a table sharing feelings...pshhh didn't you know who i was?! lol

I guess I get it. I was more exhausted from trying to quit on my own than I was from actually drinking. AA took a big weight off my shoulders and Im not ashamed to admit it.

That's great that you like AA and find it useful. I didn't.

I posted because I had some kind folk ask me to give AA a try. So I did. And though I would post my experience. If I found that I really liked it after my 20 meetings, I would have posted that too.

I don't really care what people use to stay sober. And I'd hope most people feel the same about me.

Spent the morning in the garden pulling weeds and tenting to plants. It is beautiful here. I am enjoying a beautiful sober day. Hope the same for you all.

I guess some people feel that way because over time some get to thinking that AA is the only way.....I don't think, at least for me it was a sense of pride or anything because I didn't stay with AA...just pride that I've done my time with drinking! it's over! that I am proud no matter how I got here!

The reason why people post they are sober without AA, is really just the opposite. We are all unique individuals, and one size doesn't fit all, and if you looked at the real stats most people mature out of their addictions they don't "go on to death" without the use of AA or any other formal program.

When I initially found SR I came here for support and for knowledge about my problem, I didn't come here to find a 12 step program. If I wanted to go to AA I would have researched AA programs and found one near me. That wasn't what I was looking for and even thoug I mentioned that I wasn't interested in AA I still felt that many in the forum felt the need to try and sell it to me. I knew beating addiction would truly be hard, but I also knew that a faith based program wouldn't work for me. So I started taking offense at the posts that continually told me I would either fail without AA, or if I was able to quit on my own I wasn't a "real alcoholic". So at least for me, I took the AA postings as a challenge, to show that I could accomplish sobriety without the use of AA.

I know most AA members mean no harm, in fact they are just doing what their program tells them to do, by helping other alcoholics to find AA, but to closed minded people like myself it seems almost insulting. I am curious as to why there are so many people who have bad things to say about AA. I don't see websites and youtube clips bashing and debunking any other program. Why is there so much hate for AA and why it it so controversial if it works and helps do many people, and for that matter if it works for you individually why do some feel the need to defend it? If you do AA and it works for you and you post it I don't feel the need to tell you why you will fail, or that AA is OK, but you should really try my program because it's the one that really works when you have no chances left.

RE:So, Last night I attended my 20th AA meeting . . .
 

Nice take Supercrew. When I use the term "real alcoholic" it's within the context of AA's definition and isn't meant to offend. The definition of an alcoholic in the book is described as one who cannot stop on their own resources. That's what the book, that spawned the fellowship means when it uses the term alcoholic. There is actually a difference made between an alcoholic - by the book - and a hard/heavy drinker who might drink like an alcoholic but one who can stop entirely if given sufficient reason.

Science, the science of psychiatry and psychology know more things than they did in the days the book was written.

The truth of the matter, for me, is there isn't a doctor in the world that can fix what's wrong with me. Add to that, I have a mental thing that disallows me from using "rational" thought to stay away from the first drink, delusional thinking - which isn't rational though. Plus an adverse physical reaction to alcohol once I put it into my body.

I can look at my own life, my own experience, and my own truth to see that I fit the description of an alcoholic as defined in the Big Book. So, I'm a "real alcoholic" because it's shorter to say than "I'm an alcoholic as defined by the big book", it isn't meant to be a symbol of pride or arrogance - in fact it's quite the opposite.

I ain't right in the head, body and soul. I need help that no human can provide. I meet with fellows in the fellowship because it's nice to be around people like me, because people were there to help me understand the program, and because it's fun most of the time.

I'm not there to convince anyone they should be there. I'm only supposed to be there to help if help is asked for and part of that help - with a "newcomer" is to help them understand what the Big Book means by the term "alcoholic".

Thanks TheJungianThing. I was also a "real alcoholic" as described in the big book and for a time I could not stop on my own resources, so i sought out support and knowledge for my problem and something clicked and I matured, and I no longer drink and I no longer consider myself an alcoholic. I am now a non-drinker period.

I was given sufficient reason to quit drinking for well over 15 years, and I have the physical craving after it hits my lips. I think it is great that AA works for you, but I found a way to beat it without AA.

Awesome stuff. Reconciles with what Dr. Jung said to Roland H.

LOTL, it isn't a pride thing with me either. I even liked going to the meetings and being with the people. It was just the program that I couldn't find meaning in. I took a hard look at myself back in December and new I had to stop drinking. And I drank for many years. It was a very hard thing to do at first, but now it is the new normal for me. I choose not to put ethanol in my mouth and swallow. I try to find meaning in my days. I try to be mindful of each moment.

Now I enjoy life. I enjoy being with my kids and wife. I enjoy simply puttering in the garden. I have a sense of peace that I haven't know for most of my adult life.

Supercrew, I can relate to what you write.

Principles before personalities.... Always!!

AA and the spiritual principles mean something different to each and everyone of us. If I were to judge AA, and I am not going to, based on what I read here on SR, I would be very confused. Get your own experience... And ru did just that.

Try to be open to new experience though... In everything, and nothing is ever final until we are done here on earth.

:)