Hi donweezy - great thread.....

I have noticed several posts (at least 3) to newcomers, that did make it sound like it they weren't in AA working the steps, they would fail in their sobriety. I remember being taken aback and cringing at the thought of how the newcomer might read that. I think that kind of thing would be fine in the AA forum and after people had been doing the program for a while, but NOT to someone just trying to get sober. I

I'm sure the posts are only meant to help. I think some people just forget (in their enthusiasm) the state of mind they had when first starting out. I felt so sick and shaky (and isolated) it would have been impossible for me to even entertain the idea of a meeting.

My two cents.............

That seems to be my understanding of it as well. I think the meetings are initially to get in there and get a sense that you aren't alone in your situation and that there is help. Also, you realize that there are people there who can help you get through the steps.

One of the difficult things it seemed for me (I got really burned out on the same cast of characters, who didn't really care to be there but felt somehow "obligated") was to find someone to get to know well enough to trust to be honest with to get through the steps. I think I've stopped caring about what the truth is and just want to face the music so much, that I'm going to talk to my best friend about it He's been sober 7 years.

Try what ever you feel comfortable with.

AA was the only recovery program in my area some years back. I take what I need and I leave the rest.

I'm an AA'er. With 34 years of being sober. THAT'S SOBER!!. And ya I could say that AA played a "major" part of my being sober. There is alot of alternative paths that is just as good or even better than AA, that someone could use for a worth while soberiety. Heck, I also been on alot of dry-drunks. And believe me if AA was not there. It would have been easy to start those abusive patterns again. I would suggest you make some time and go to the 2010 International Alcoholic Anonymous Convention in San Antonio, Texas, July 104, 2010. Anyway take this: :a043:. Love an Peace!!!

There are other ways
 

AA does work for some people. However, others have a hard time with it. Sometimes it is the "god" concept and for others, it is their position in the community which makes attending meetings difficult at best.

"There are many roads to the top of the mountain, but the view is the same once you get there."

For me, the key was pursuing the spiritual experience. The Big Book refers to it as "psychic change". I found this by pursuing metaphysical principles and applying them to my daily life.

What are the other ways?

That's a pretty broad generalization you're making there. How many meetings have you attended, and how many people have you met in the program?

That's better.
Jme, but the majority of the folks I encounter at meetings use the "I" statement, not the "you" statement.

"I feel that AA and the 12 steps saved my life"

When I was very new to the program, I always believed they were talking about/at me, when they were in fact using the "I" statement

My best thinking has led me down some pretty twisted roads.

Yes, there are probably any number of people out there that have managed to maintain sobriety without the program of AA, but I don't personally know any of these people, and therefore can't offer any advice as to how they did it, and in any event, it wasn't my experience.

I can tell you of my experience at 'going it alone', managed to maintain a period of almost 14 years of abstinence without AA in the last 11 odd years of that period. It was not a happy life during that period of time. And not one I would characterize as a period of 'sobriety'.

And of course I went back out again for another round after that 14 years

I've found AA, with all of it's repetition and boredom, is what I need to maintain some semblance of a sane life. These days, I prefer to let others do the experimenting for me. Good luck, let us know how it goes.

That's because AA has become about the meetings you make regardless of the content.
It has nothing to do with the original intent of AA.
It's all about meetings.
We can thank Rehab centers for this.

For me I do a lot of martial arts and have met some great friends in there who do not drink. We train hard and then do sober things outside of class. Also I started going back to school, these two things along with my full time job helps keep me sober.

Some people would say I am abstaining but not recovering. I disagree. I'm on here quite a bit and read "Under the Influence" before seeing it on here. I just went to an AA meeting last week because my friend engouraged me to go and she presented me with a 6 month coin. It was nice, I will probably go back from time to time to hear other speak of there struggles. It's just not feesable (spelling) for me to go there several days a week. I support anyone who is getting sober, now matter what path they take to get there.

There's a whole sticky about recovery programs...

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...resources.html

I don't use AA/NA in my recovery, but I don't knock anyone who does. Whatever works..

As an AA member I certainly don't think that way. I know around 5 people who have quit using other methods.

ALL people?
I rarely find it repetitive because I go to different groups, and each group is different. And, every AA group I know of has a rotating format that ranges from big book readings to theme meetings, to speaker meetings, etc, etc. Perhaps you found your group repetitive because the format was not changed enough? I understand that some AA groups can be too open theme-oriented, and I suppose that could get repetitive.

You've got some good suggestions here for alternatives, and someone provided a link to some information here on the site. Hope you find what you are looking for!

This is why I no longer attend AA. Don't get me wrong, it was crucial for me in my first few months of sobriety, but there's no way I could have done it long-term. My sponsor told me, among other things, that I would go back out if I left AA. If I didn't pray to God, her God, on my knees and out loud daily. If I didn't wear nice clothes to meetings (she actually had the nerve to tell me to go buy new clothes so I'd look right at homegroup). Et cetera. Obviously, she was an atrocious sponsor in more ways than one, but the "my way or the highway" sentiments she expressed weren't hers alone. When I left the program, everyone expected me to go back out. Nearly two years later, I'm still sober. :)

Ranting aside, AAers tend to feel strongly about the program for good reason. It does help many people, and it's certainly the biggest and most well-known sobriety group. Small wonder it creates some fanatics.

If you don't like AA you can always do it the Matt Talbot way:

Matt Talbot - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I've been around the rooms of AA since 1986, and I've never told anyone that AA is the only way.

I can tell them what worked for me, and walk them through the steps if that's what they want.

If they prefer something else, that is entirely their right.

AA is the way for me. :)

I actually think we can thank ourselves for this. It's our (the AA members) responsibility to uphold our Traditions and carry a message. It's not the rehabs job to make sure we stuck with the original program of recovery.

i like AA. Anything that scares the average person must carry a good message. Boo! I'm kind of responding to another thread saying AA is a cult also.

I like that.
The same has been said of Allen Carr. I also thank Allen for that.
People always try to see the complicated issue but the answer really is very simple-DON'T DRINK POISON.

I LOVE AA and some of my strongest supporters are from the AA path.
It did not appeal to me personally.

Yeah, but we were out numbered!
Rehabs sent in the masses raving about 90/90 and slogans to get the job done.

AA is not the only way to get sober. I got clean using SMART Recovery. When I felt that wasn't enough, I began to supplement it with AA meetings. I asked a friend with over fifteen years clean time in AA for the best type of meetings. He recommended to me Big Book meetings. I mix my meetings up this way: Big Book, 12 and 12 study, discussion group, As Bill Sees It meeting, and speaker meeting. This keeps me from having to hear a bunch of people moan and whine.

I also work the steps in conjunction with SMART. This has been a great program for me. Everyone is different.

I could never live without my iMac and the internet... :-)