You know, my H who is recovering, hasn't gone to a meeting in 4 months and I am not worried about him relapsing. Why? I don't know, I guess maybe because he owns his own well-being and I cannot control what he does and what he does not do.
Now my husband stopped going because he works 7 days a week and M - F he leaves home at 6am and gets home at 9p. Sat & Sun he works from 9am til 8pm. He really has no time to go. He speaks to his sponsor daily and his AA friends probably weekly, I'm not sure about those folks though. Actually it's not my job to monitor who he speaks with.
What is important to me that my H, although not currently attending meetings because of his work schedule, is still working the program even without the meetings
You see, I can whip myself right back into that co-dependent state of mind and mode if you will if I CHOSE to worry about my husband .... but I won't do that to myself, I've too much to lose.