Picking up your good vibes Wolfman. Know they're warmly, graciously, gratefully received. Thank you for the thoughtful attention.
"Truthful explanation" resounds. I WANT to be truthful, open, honest, direct, but so often that creates such controversy (ESPECIALLY regarding matters of spirituality, beliefs, drug use) I opt for avoidance. Which is also deceptive practice, and generates problems of its own.
Because "alone time" is pretty much all the time, and knowing my propensity for avoidance, I suspect "isolation masquerading" is the true answer, but don't know why. Both directions seem riddled with potential threat, being open and honest and engaging has inherent risks (of exposure, and of hurting/ disappointing/ frustrating/ angering people), being silent and hiding and isolated holds greater risks (re-opens the door to complete withdrawl/ retreat.)
Oh yes that IS "paralysis of analysis" in action. That phrase rolls through my head frequently, though not always quick enough. Not before I become paralyzed--stuck--does it come to mind. Part of the problem of living in one's head, I realize.
And again you touch on going "easy" on myself. You know I was third and fourth and fifth guessing myself just before coming here to SR today, and found your post. So I'll be knocking that off now and go back to what makes sense. Trusting that the answers will come, in time, and with patience. And with sound direction. It's knowing WHO and what to trust/ believe that trips me up so. Thinking and living in the positive always proves helpful and forward-moving. It's a gorgeous sunny day. The natural world is ALWAYS straight-forward REAL. I know to trust it, it's where life makes simple clear sense. A small dose of positive encouragement goes a long way with me. I return the favor in well-wishes for a peaceful day to you as well, my friend.