Thanks for your replies guys - it's really touching to know that people are out there listening and who know what one is going thru.
Rose i have been to AA before and am doing so again. Funny cos i made more friends in the few weeks that i atteneded meetings than i have done since drinking got stupid. And i find everything so much more fun when sobre, which ar mostly the times that i spend with my partner - who doesnt know the extent of my problem when im alone.
Carol - i don't have much of a plan really. No detox programme as such except for trying to do it by myself, going to meetings and reading lots on the net. The thread you linked is very useful thanks.
Im up late cos i cant sleep, but the most enjoyable thing for me so far is going to sleep and actually having dreams - i can't wait for tonights!
Adam