Well, yes, I see where you're going with that. And, if you feel close to going back to the lifestyle, then it's clearly a concern. Let me see, I'm not an AA person either, so I don't go to meetings. My recovery has involved books, which have been the pillars of my life and coming here to SR which has helped enormously. Here I have the benefit of learning, of being helped when I'm down and of sharing what I know with others. What you're talking about I think, is balance and that's something I've tried to maintain since being sober. I know and accept there are things I can't/won/t do now, that I would have before. For example, if my social interaction is for a prolonged period (having guests staying with me for several days) or being with people all day long without a break, I start to regress. The spirituality is the first thing to go because I become so focused on the people that I lose the perspective of myself as a spiritual being. So, I think balance is crucual. Maybe talking to some people about your addiction might help you. The main thing is don't force yourself beyond what you know you can handle. Pushing yourself can be a good thing, but forcing is another thing. Above all, be kind and gentle with yourself. It is my firm belief that we know ourselves best and we know what we need. We must only listen to hear what it is.