I'm really sad today.
I just found out that I'm on probation for my financial aid at college. That is due to me not earning enough hours this past year because the whole year I kept falling back into drinking/drugs and you know what, at the time it seemed like nothing *BIG* was happening.... *BUT* the whole time when it seemed like nothing big was happening, the small things were adding up. For example, I just couldn't function as a student. I was hungover a lot and too messed up to study or go to class. All of that finally added up and took its toll on me. I've messed up so much and I can't fix that. It really, really hurts so bad!!
All I have it today though and I can't change the past. I am saying the serenity prayer because I need it now. All I can do is to learn from my mistakes and make better choices in the future.
I am on probation for a year. I can't afford to screw up anymore or this will fall apart on me. I just feel soooo hurt, upset, and very shocked after reading that letter.