TAC, Welcome to Sober Recovery, this is the greatest site ever, however sometimes Sat and Sun are slow days for replys'. Just keep checking in,
I like everything mega above said. Yes, it is only human to be angry, to get even, to build walls etc. However leaving might be the best thing you have done for you both.
Have you read everything you can find on alcoholism ??
Read as many of the threads on here as you can. Stickies at the top and power posts. Might I ask if you have gone to Al-Anon meetings, most of us found help there along with this site. I feel we need both.
Keep coming back and always remember to take what you can use and leave the rest, but I feel the more we can learn the better life is for us. Understanding the terrible thing addiction is, at least helps us understand even if we cannnot help them.
Really hard to learn and to understand, but if we help ourselves first, and get a better outlook, it helps them too in many cases they hit bottom and start to get sober, or in some cases, we see there isn't any help.
Just remember, we did not cause it.
I am so glad you are here. BIG HUGS