Originally Posted by whatsername
I love my mom so much and I have tried to be as supportive as I can....I just don't know how to rebound from this. It has seriously affected me, and I am just stuck.
Hey Whatser,
First, I want you to know that I believe you. My situation is a little different (more verbal/emotional/psychological mind games than actual physical abuse), but still more the same than not.
What struck me about this statement you made is that you say you love your mom so much...but, one thing I've learned since being in program is that I have to love myself first.
I constantly remind myself of the SCUBA rescuing scenario I once learned about. The rule is that if you have to rescue someone underwater and there is only one tank of oxygen, the rescuer must take the oxygen first, in order to have the strength to provide any help at all to the victim. So, I'd like to tell you, TAKE THE OXYGEN...that's one of the first and best things you can do.
She's obviously very sick, but I'll borrow a line from Al-anon...you didn't cause it, you can't cure it. You can still love someone without allowing them to pull you into their drama...take some "time off." Even if it is only for a few months to pull yourself together.
Check out some more support-type groups. Is there an Al-anon or al-ateen or ACOA group meeting in your area? How about a Codependents anonymous? You don't have to talk...but it's amazing what a relief it can be when we realize that others really do understand and really do care.
"Did you wake up today? Then, it's not too late" --Maya Angelou