hello all,
Meg here...
Um, OK.... Tell me if this sounds AT ALL familiar to any of you. My husband has been "working his program" for a couple of months now - he is doing good.
Last night, he was buggin me for sex
... and I have learned NOT to give in, and just do the "mercy" thing - FORGET that! I just say NO now... and walk away. If I feel like it, he'll know
. So anyway, he wasn't too upset... and then again this morning "Wanna get naked?" he says. "NO thanks" I replied. Then he took off for the day, a little peeved.
When he returned at 6pm, he asked me AGAIN!@!! I almost burst out laughing this time "NO thanks" I said holding back the chuckles. So... He says "aren't u gonna ask me if I've been having a hard time NOT drinking lately?". I told him that I couldn't ask him that all the time - That it would be self-defeating for me: I can't be involved in those ways (you know?)... I just have to work my OWN program. I told him that it "wasn't my business". And he was upset by this!
He says that it doesn't matter if he is drinking or not... that people have just gotten USED to him being sober now, so he doesn't the praise and pats on the back for BEING sober. What is THIS all about?! I mean, a part of me wants to be supportive.. but he is acting like such a baby! Should I reward my son each time he DOESN'T hit his brother?!!
Is that what the sex thing is all about? He thinks it is a reward?!
Let me just say that his being SOBER is more confusing that his using - at least when he was using, he was PREDICTABLE!
Anyhow, any thoughts on this would be great
Meg