Almost 1yr Old
Im coming up on a year and my head is going crazy!!! I know that all I have is today but I keep projecting and comparing and thinking I sholuld hve mroe an I havent done enough and my recovery isnt good enough and blah blah blah. I love my life today and I love being clean and I am so grateful for my higher power. And I DONT want to get high so bad that Im scared Im going to get high, if that makes any sense. I know what I have to loose today. This is the longest time I have ever had clean and I know I have a lot to loose this time around but it just makes me that much more nervous that I will screw up again. I get scared because I am 19 years old and I am a complete junk bomb in recovery I feel hopeless sometimes because I am a junkie I dont know my head is all over the place I just know I have to keep my head where my feet are but right now its so hard. HELP!!!!