Too Proud!
I finally got my a/h to say why he wont go to my weekly counseling sessions for co-dependency (been going for 2 months). He says he is too proud, that he was brought up to believe that strong men dont go to counseling and that he doesn't buy into AA and 12 steps (he went many years ago). Too proud to help his wife that has stuck by him for 25 years drunk or sober!! I ask him every week to go, that he is doing this for me and our marriage and he keeps saying no. It hurts too much to keep asking and the wall between us is growing higher--so I have decided to give up. He is sober at the current time (3 weeks) and is doing positive, healthy things for himself, he really is trying hard but he won't reach out for any other type of help. He has stayed sober for months, years at a time without outside help. But, I know he will drink again--when, who knows. Going to counseling has become almost as painful and as lonely for me as what I go through when he is drinking. Am I totally off the wall the expect him to come with me--just once. It's killing me because I really think one session will really make a big impression on him and give him a dose of reality regarding how his drinking affects me and him. I guess this is what is means to let go of something, because I feel like Im beating my head against the wall and I just cant do it anymore.