Hangin,
I know what you mean about common sense. I thought I could intuit what was the right and wrong things to do and say, but NEWSFLASH....I can't. And part of that is because of MY codependence. Old habits are hard to break but they can be broken.
As for that book....you didn't get your copy??
Let's see, if memory serves, in chapter one it says that rehabs don't ask for your opinion. I wanted to know the same things you do and Pernell told me very nicely that those things are covered.
Oh and in the last chapter of that book? It says in bold print. It aint over until they decide it's over! There is nothing the center can do except give her the tools and the strength to do it when she is ready.
So grab a mint julip, a juicy novel and climb in that porch rocker and try to get her off your mind. She is in God's hands.
Hugs,
JT